whether to have another child

[oakpinebeech]

I'm in turmoil lol

Background we have one child just over 1. He was born due to clomid and was late preterm but no health issues. He took eighteen months ttc and seven clomid rounds.

I'm early thirties and DH early forties. I'm struggling to think about ttc again but feel due to our ages we should consider it. However I like having one child and feel it has its pros. How do you decide?

I've made a list

Pros
More money
Only having to go through pregnancy and labour once
More freedom and easier getting babysitters
I'm an introvert so too much overwhelms me

Cons
Usual when we die etc.
Pregnancy might not happen anyway
More pressure on marriage having more than one child

How does your husband feel about it? If he says no more, then your question is answered. As for having an only child, I think you would be very happy. I'm an only child and had a wonderful childhood and I'm very close to my parents.

He's open and has no feelings strongly either way. I would be high risk with another one. I do have anxiety and depression it's just my personality so the worry would be immense.
One point that worries me is that I have known people to lose children

Even if you had 5 children, that would not lessen the grief if one were to die. Death and dying is a part of life but we can't let the fear of it cripple us.

It wouldn't but the pain of losing your only child would push me over the edge completely

I know a lady whose child sadly died and it was the other children that kept her alive reslly

I don't think having another child just in case one dies is really rational thinking.