How to get info out of a potential new boyfriend?

[LemonLimerance]

What would you write?

I have a guy that I have fooled around with a couple of times. I like him, but he does enjoy playing hard to get.

Our last meeting I had to cancel at short notice because I couldn't get childcare. I felt bad and arranged for him to come over on a weekend when my son would be abroad with his dad.

He expressed interest but hasn't actually confirmed if he's coming or not. I don't really like playing games but I need to know if he's coming! If he isn't, fine - I'm finding his attitude a bit of a turnoff, but I'm not going to just sit here waiting.

What can I say to give him a nudge? I don't want to sound aggressive but also don't want to sound pathetic.

hope you're free on the 16th because 'll be waiting for you alone."

If he hasn't replied to that; I think his intentions are clear - and I'd make sure I was out when he was due. I wouldn't be a back up option if he gets bored on Saturday.

It's unfortunate; but he's shown his hand. His game playing is a stalling tactic.

OP.

If this man was by any bit invested in you he would have replied & not kept you waiting hence you having to ask on here?!

Raise the bar regarding your standards. No man that really likes/values you messes you about like this & it would really help you work people out if you read between the lines re this type of behaviour. They would be direct & explain why they couldn't make it etc not ignoring your invite & leaving you wondering.

Definitely NOT boyfriend material as your title suggested.

Ofgs, I think you're getting a bit of a hard time here! You don't sound at all like you're desperate to txt him/ hear from him so given your most recent posts if you do hear from him the night before/ day of your suggested night in with the typical 'We still on for tonight/ tomorrow' type thing just reply with a 'Oh! No, afraid not. Didn't hear from you so made other plans. Take care' jobby and that's it. If you never hear from him again oh well.

Thanks @Yourcupwillneverempty for not piling on! People on here really like to categorise other posters, and like I said I got filed under “loser”, but that’s ok. I think I made the tone of my original OP a little too apologetic and that always gets people baying for blood for some reason.

I haven’t messaged. At this point I simply refuse to chase. Has been very interesting reading these posts though so thank you all.

loopy I’ve enjoyed engaging with people on here, it’s what the site is for. I do consider my texts fairly carefully but I maintain that I’m not obsessing... I did feel rather cross about the whole thing for a while, but I seem to have mostly forgotten about it now, which is nice.

Thank you Anchor I agree with everything you said.

I do resent having to be out on the date in question, because I’d rather be home, but I can always just have the lights off and not answer the door. Be quite satisfying actually

Of course you can be in. It's your home. If he turns up without having confirmed, simply answer the door and say 'oh, didn't realise you were coming... fraid I've made other plans as I hadn't heard from you. Bye'

Just text him that something came up and you're not free. Then he doesn't need to respond to it but equally he knows he is no longer invited so you don't randomly get him turning up. Then save yourself and disengage from him completely.