Does your 13yo have a smartphone?

[Velella]

I've held off getting my 13yo a smartphone (he has a dumb phone that can only do calls and texts) because I think the downsides outweigh the upsides. He has internet access on our family computer in the living room.

However in recent weeks I have come under a lot of pressure from him to let him have one. He says he is the only child in his class without one.

Am I being a Victorian parent? Should I get him one?

Dychmygol, that is helpful. I think we will go down the road of giving him dh's old iPhone and coming up with a compromise we can all agree with. Thank you to everyone else for your comments too.

Thanks too sunnyhazyday.

He had a hand me down for six months then was given a smart phone in year seven. DS asked for a Galaxy S9 for his birthday this year, his 14th. He needs to carry a phone at all times because he goes into anaphylaxis. I know it seems extravagant but he's looked after them all and having a good one encourages him never to go out without it.

Unfortunately I think it is how things are now, they will literally be the only child without a smartphone at 13, I reckon most have them by Y6/7. It is how society is and I guess as parents we should move on with it all.

Mine both have smartphones Y6 and Y8, they are not mega expensive ones but they use them for all sorts, including homework on the go not just for games and messaging. My 12 yo makes his social arrangements on group chats, I actually like that part of it. We have never had any downsides as yet but I monitor very carefully.

I think by this age most do.
I think you are being a bit unreasonable as many children use them for social interaction etc They do have advantages, my son lost a homework sheet and a friend took a screen shot just as an example.
We gave laid down ground rules. I can have access to the phone whenever I want. I must be a 'friend' on any social media and I must know the password. If that is not stuck too then I cancel the contract!

My 15 year old ds got one this week. He's never been bothered about having one until recently (he meets his friends after school and they go to the park) and even then was pretty happy with the Huawei p20 lite rather than an iPhone or Samsung. I was going to buy him a used handset and a SIM but it worked out cheaper to get him a cheap contract. It's £17 a month and the phone is on a par with my S8.

My ten year old has one. Vast majority of his friends do too. I'd imagine a 13 year old without one would be unusual nowadays. In theory I agree with you, in practice, I'd get him one.

My 12year old dd has my old iphone (SE). We have a SIM only contract. She's very heavy handed with the phone and loses it regularly. It certainly won't be resellable when the contract is up. I've told her she can have a nice fancy one when she treats her (and everyone else's) stuff better.

We got DD one for her 12th birthday (didn’t know what else to get her), when she’d just started secondary school last year. She was the only one of her friends not to have one. She’s not allowed it in her bedroom overnight though. We’ve also downloaded a tracking app so as a family we can see where each other is - she’s been caught out a few times by that. I would expect most 13 to have one by now tbh.

from year 7 with all mine. cheap phone first to show they would look after it then smart phone midway through y 7