I am MORTIFIED

[Jammiebammie]

Hurrying to get ready this morning and trying to quickly slap on some make up - couldn’t find a bobble so just grabbed a pair of thongs from my (clean) washing pile to tie my hair up.
Dd was being really difficult so abandoned the make up idea and just hurried and left.

Went to the school and had a meeting with a couple of teachers re dd. Then went to a hospital appointment for dd, and to a cafe afterwards.
Home now, and dd1 walked in and said ‘haaa, mum, why do you have knickers in your hair’
Yup - that’s right. I’ve had the thongs tying my hair up ALL FRIGGIN DAY!!! And dd1 is laughing her head off at me.

Why did nobody tell me?? I know the receptionist, the teachers, the consultants and nobody said a bloody word. 2 women were giving me funny looks in the cafe but as dd has a noticeable disability I presumed they were staring at her and gave them a well practised ‘dont stare at my daughter’ look back.

Oh my god I want the ground to swallow me up. They weren’t even nice thongs - greying, lacey primark ones with all the elastic bits poking out. Dd said they were glaringly obvious.

Would you have said anything? Shall I say anything to the consultants when we’re back on Thursday, so they don’t think I’ve lost my marbles??! Oh no... I might just move countries instead.

Please help me to feel better and tell me you’ve done something similar. Off to crawl under a rock now...

Anthea Turner, I think it was who hosted the program.

@Wellhereweare78 Oh my good lord I have just woken my DD up from laughing so loudly at that! A flipping toothbrush?! I can just envisage a teacher looking up like What the fuck?!?!

My mum was served in a bank once by a woman with a thong hair tie! She didm’t Have the heart to tell her! 😂

Dh walked around John Lewis in a Guinness fleece with a huge pair of my black faded, holey, bleachy crotched (aka russet gusset) size 26 knickers stuck to his back. He wanted to buy a gift card after work so showered and grabbed the first thing out of the dryer before leaving. I was feeding dd so didn't notice
He came back and that's when I noticed. He wasn't amused as he thought people were looking and he was telling himself off for being paranoid.

It had to be those knickers though didn't it?

I frequently grab a pair to use as a night mask

But what will people think, Oldraver, if you die in the night and you're found with your big knickers on your head?

they both burst out laughing and started walking about with my knickers on their heads - no support there!

You're barking up the wrong tree entirely, OP, if you expect any support from thongs. You need some Bridget Jones mummy pants like mine for that.

This is the thread that keeps on giving. Thanks to the OP and lots of PPs, I'm feeling a lot more cheery about being up at this ungodly hour with a DC now!

My own embarrassing attire moment involved a top rather than knickers, although I think my witnessing friend obviously thought that knickers had been involved too. Some years back, I went on a first date with a chap. I went straight round to a friend's afterwards who was eagerly awaiting news on how the date had gone. I took off my coat and my friend immediately noticed that my top was on inside out. 'Get dressed in a hurry?!', she said. The upshot of this was that she clearly thought the date had been a lot 'hotter' than it actually was, if you get my drift. It didn't matter that I protested we'd only met for a cup of coffee, hadn't hit it off, and I hadn't taken my coat off let alone anything else. It didn't matter that I insisted I must have gone out like that in the first place and that I only spent 30 minutes with the guy. Forever after, this friend has called me by the nickname Fast Worker, including in front of other people.

'Friends' in embarrassing situations - who needs 'em.

This is going off on a tangent, but I think I can top you with the story of my first date with dh. He picked me up after work and told me he'd booked a nice restaurant for dinner, I was wearing a halter neck under another top and hadn't had a chance to change at work, so while he stopped to go to a cash point I discreetly removed my bra and stuffed it in my pocket, thinking that once we got to the restaurant I could remove my upper layer and look suitably glamourous. Lovely evening later, I get home and check my pockets. Bra is missing. Greying, really not sexy bra missing. Realised it had fallen out of my pocket into dh's car. Was so mortified I didn't know what to do. We laugh about it now as dh says he found it a couple of days later and did wonder if it was some bizarre kind of come on and just put it down to me being a bit, er, 'quirky'. Dh was gentlemanly enough not to raise it and I don't think I even talked about it until we'd been seeing each other for six months!

We must know what your now-DH did with the bra?!

@Wellhereweare78

😆😆😆😆

When DS was little and didn’t sleep, I once spent a whole morning at work with my top on inside out, and my name badge upside down. I’m a GP. I saw 18 patients plus assorted relatives that morning, no-one said anything.
The Practice Manager came into my room after morning surgery and basically said ‘What the hell happened to you!’
Not my most trustworthy or professional look!

I'm baffled as to how you can use knickers to tie your hair up?! And why???

My embarrassing moment happened when I had a tooth out. I walked home via town (it was market day!) and the shops. Got loads funny looks and wasn't sure why until I got home and looked in the mirror, saw I had trails of dried blood and drool going down my chin. My face was numb so of course I couldn't feel myself dribbling

When I was a toddler my dad let me do his make up with one of those terrible kiddie sets - bright blues, greens and pinks.

He forgot about it and went to the shop

Is this you OP?

Very funny thread

dd says the primark label was sticking out the side of the gusset

Love this!

Note to self: Stop wearing knickers on my head.

But what will people think, Oldraver, if you die in the night and you're found with your big knickers on your head?

It certainly puts a new twist on the concept of ‘accident underwear’

My dad had a comb over. Think Friar Tuck with 8 inch wisps. He had been very Bald since age 21.
He used to fall asleep on lounge chair & I would play with his wisps.
He woke up one afternoon & rushed to work not realising he had a Pebbles flintstone sticky up with a lovely pink ribbon!!!!!.
Poor Dad.

If it's even the faintest drop of comfort I've had a really crap day and your thread has given me the first proper smile of the day. So thanks, Jammiebammie.

Oh God, that brings back memories, I'd a lecturer with a comb over, he clearly sprayed it down, and he once came in and it had blown in the opposite direction, so it was like a handle sticking out the side of his head, with the bald patch totally exposed.

To be fair no one even sniggered, we all just sat there looking like this 😱 .

Aw I didn’t realise this thread had anymore posts! And you’re all still laughing 🙈 Some great stories from everyone else too, what a laugh!

I just found this photo online (ignore the ridiculous title ) and I can guarantee I didn’t look at good as that but it does show how you do it. (I’m wondering if the woman stuck a blue butterfly on to make it look better or if it was already on the underwear?? Maybe that’s where I went wrong!)

Now to me, butterfly or not, that still looks like a woman with her pants in her hair.

And are comb-overs still a thing? Who knew?! I haven't seen one for years. What was that cigar advert?!

amusedbush if I’d had coffee in my mouth I would have spat it all out!!! Thanks for the best laugh I’ve had today

weepat I’m dying here!!!