How do you cope with the fact that housework is an incessant cycle that stops only when you die?

[RelentlessSylvia]

I wash clothes, I dry clothes, I sort clothes, I fold clothes, (I don't iron clothes - don't judge me), I put clothes away then I wash clothes, I dry clothes, I sort clothes...

Same with dishes. Same with vacuuming, sweeping, mopping, cleaning bathrooms, scrubbing toilets, cleaning the kitchen, wiping surfaces, tidying, buying groceries.

Most of the time I just get on with it cheerfully but sometimes I get struck by an overwhelming sense of futility. It's a Sysephian (I can't spell that) task. I can't afford a cleaner. How do you cope with the numbing sense that housework is a huge waste of life??

I hate the thoughts of it but when I start it I like it the thing I hate about it is I take hours to do just one section of the house I’m as slow.
I love cooking to
Me that’s fun and never a bother.
I like listening to my programs in the background.

I try to think of it as a natural system like the tide. If it's messy, the tide is in, if it's not, the tide is out.

The thing is, you don't know when you are going to die. You could work out how much cleaning you have left to do based on the average death ràte but that could end up being a lot less. Nice and jolly

5 dc here 4 with disabilities
Thoroughly recommend the organised Mum method it’s been amazing for us. We do have a cleaner as well but that’s a luxury and actually TOMM would be enough if we stopped the cleaner but it’s my treat to myself each week

We had a cleaner but some stuff went missing so we had to get rid (no proof but cleaner was the only one who could have taken what went missing)

I have Arthritis so cleaning isn't just a horrible chore, it's often something I'm too debilitated to do. Kids are too young and DP is self employed / long hours / woks 6 days per week (but does have a blitz on his day off!)

I try to keep on top of the basics (washing up, laundry, kids uniform ironed, sides cleared and wiped, toys and shite put away) but it's been a while since I've managed to do a complete hoover of the house we have 30 internal stairs that gets left for DP as does all the mopping and the bathrooms!!

One of my precious cleaners stole my clothes. I bumped into her wearing them one day. I kept thinking how worried she looked and that something seemed familiar.,... as I said bye and walked off it hit me ! She was wearing my clothes !!!

Previous

She definitely wasn’t precious 🤣🤣

I have lots of time at home to do the housework. My house is always tidy, but the deep cleaning is soul destroying. I hate it. I don't iron either, straight out if the tumble dryer, shook and folded.

When my DS is away from home, it stays clean and tidy. I'm not going to say I'm looking forward to him moving out, but..... yeah, the house staying clean is something I look forward too.

Yanbu

I totally get you. It's a thankless task.

OP I think that in your case where you are at home full time with your children the task seems more overwhelming. I only have one DS and he has no disability but I do recall the days being home with a toddler, the constant mess and there is no break from it. I understand how it must feel soul destroying for you.

I can advise what works for me - but I totally acknowledge that my situation is different from yours.

Concentrate on 'good enough' not 'perfection' and prioritise. We need to eat but that doesn't mean I slave away coking from scratch. I use online delivery, standard order, changing just a few items. Meals are quick like pasta with jar sauce and bagged salad, or something which cooks in the oven in 45 mins, minimal or no preparation e.g. Ready made lasagne, wedges, bagged salad. I put the oven on when I get in, unload my bag, food in oven, get changed, play with dog for 15 mins (wash hands!!), serve food.

I load dishwasher in the evening and set off, unload first thing in the morning and reload with any cups: plates that were left over from previous evening. Washing/tumble drying around 5 days a week. Load/ unload either first thing or while dinner is cooking. DH puts dried clothes away, we hang as many items as possible to save creasing. Minimal ironing, no more than half an hour at weekend.

As DS is now a teenager we don't have the clutter of younger children but do have dog hairs. DH likes things tidy, more so than DS and myself, therefore he tidies the odd clutter away and empties bins. On a weekly basis I Hoover around downstairs, middle of the room (i.e. I don't move furniture) and dust surfaces. Our bathroom is downstairs so no need for visitors to go upstairs, therefore bedrooms cleaned as and when I have time, no more than once a fortnight. It takes minutes to wipe over sink, mirror, pull shower curtain across the bath. Toilet is cleaned daily.

Every now and then I'll do a deeper clean but certainly not every week. Our house is 'good enough' but never a 'show home'.