Children’s books you don’t like?

[MagnaDoodle]

Anyone got a book or two that makes them inwardly sigh and weep when DC asks for them?

I had to read my most disliked book today. Burglar Bill. Dirge.

I remember a Brownie pack holiday when I was about 8, as were most of the other girls, and I was horrified because they read Mr Men stories to us as bedtime stories, and they seemed ridiculously babyish and dull.

We has them read on Guide camp. Guides!

I also can't see how anyone can hate Alfie. But I have thought of another one. Denver by the man who wrote Mr Benn. A rich man lives in a village, where an evil socialist arrives to tell the peasants it's not really fair he has all that money. Rich man agrees, shares out his wealth and moves away. Feckless peasants spunk away their newfound wealth on crap, while rich man becomes an artist and gets wealthy again. Peasants are sad their village doesn't have rich man living there any more. Moral - if you are rich it is because you are intrinsically better than everyone else and if you are poor it is your own feckless fault and you better hope your local rich guy is good enough to throw you a few crumbs every now and again. My God it is awful. DS brought it home from school and I was open mouthed.

had them read. Not has.

I love loads of books mentioned! I particularly love Burglar Bill. It was my eldests favourite. She used to laugh so much at boglabol.

I detest the Rainbow Fish and the Large Family book where they go on a diet as they are awful messages for children.

Mr Men & Little Miss
Wibbly fucking Pig
The Very Hungry Caterpillar
The Night Before Christmas

If e're on Christmas books, the Polar Express. Creepy as heck and Santa at the centre of a mass personality cult.

Grandads Island. Nursery gave it to my DS as his Christmas Santa gift.

Turns out it's one of those explaining death to kids books

All those formulaic 'fairy school' books. Some of the writing is dire.

For all those who hate the Great Dog Bottom Swap please do try some of Peter Bently's other books. His writing is wonderful and witty!

Sparklyfee OMG i don't know the book but it certainly sounds an inappropriate Christmas gift.

I can't remember what the book was but at the end of P1 my then 6yo was given a picture book. He handed it to me saying I've been given a book for my baby brother. I don't know what the PTA were thinking it was just so babyish for kids of that age.

Sparkly we has similar-"Grandpa's bench" was a Santa present at the Christmas fair at school. They'd just ordered lots of multipacks and that was one. They got a fair number of complaints.
It made me cry but Ds loved it though. The Grandpa was just like my dad.

I don't like The Rainbow Fish. It's meant to be about sharing, but comes across to me like it's about buying people's friendship and losing your individuality to fit in

I don't mind Julia Donaldson, but there is an air of smugness about announcing you're a fan. It's kind of My Child Is A READER who will never cross paths with an iPad.

At the end of infant school, so when he was seven, DS2 was given Huckleberry Finn by the school (children who had a certain number of behaviour points were given a book). I still don’t know what in the world they were thinking.

People who give out books to kids really should check how appropriate they are. I honestly don't know what is worse, giving a child a book that's way beneath them or one thats way too advanced. And thats before you think about the content.

I remember a church group giving me a book that's was like a Schaffer flip flap book - with no words in it - I was about 10. Ok i did / do struggle with dyslexia so they may have had heart in right place but I felt so insulted.

Interesting re Denver - author is David McKee. I've not discerned any particular political message in the Elmer books or Not Now, Bernard but this one does sound rather blatant. Just looked it up on Amazon (not because I want to buy it) and I'm not sure I've seen another book with such polarised reviews - 7 5, 1 4 and 18 1* reviews.

Mr Men
That's Not My...
Meg and Mog
Rainbow Fairies

Really shocked by all the people mentioning the Julia Donaldson books on here. They have to be my favourite, and I have read them so many times I could probably recite a handful of them by heart! DD2 absolutely loves Stick Man and Tabby McTat.

Not a fan of David Walliams either, and agree that there's a massive feeling of 'smugness'.

Mr and Little Miss books...I really want to like them as I'm sure I did as a child, but they're not particularly enjoyable to read.

The worst offender has to be 'Fly Guy'- American, and absolutely horrific.

Charlie and sodding Lola.

Where are their parents and why is poor Charlie having to do all the parenting?

I want to see a book where Charlie gets to have a fun day out doing what he wants to do for a change.

Slightly over-invested .

I used to work in children's publishing and I used to represent many names who appear on this thread

When I say that I covered up the great TTTE sex scandal, you'll never look at those engines and their couplings in the same light again.

Glad to see that other people don't like The Rainbow Fish. I bought it in a hurry because DD likes fish, and I hated the story so much that I ended up making up a completely different story to go with the pictures (DD can't read so wasn't any the wiser). The message seemed to be "give way to other people's massive sense of entitlement or you will end up alone" .

My mum claims she is still scarred by having to read me Milly Molly Mandy books (I am 50 next year). I loved them as a kid, but my god when I re-read them I see her point. Of course there are bad books, and most children's books aren't meant to be enjoyable for adults to read, so we are allowed to hate some of them. I'm another Thomas the Tank hater, so bloody dull to read, although I loved the cartoon as a child. But my son loved them, so I put up with it!. I can't remember anything else I really loathed though, it was a long time ago!

Guess How Much I Love You.... I just wish that big nut-brown hare would stop it with the relentless one upmanship...

Agree about Big Brown Hare or whatever he is called. He could point out to his son that he will be able to jump that high when he grows up

Oh some of my favourites are mentioned here as hates (Love the Oi Frog series and am gutted that DS is now too old for them. Love most Julia Donaldson (the Snail and the Whale is the one I could never get to scan). I have found memories of Roald Dahl from childhood and rereading them to DS hasn't spoilt those memories. The Great Dog Bottom Swap is fantastic, as is the Little Mole who knew it was none of his business).
I hated reading any Enid Blyton as a child and have only read Noddy of hers to DS - it's the only book I've ever hidden. I just don't get The Tiger who came to Tea. Why? What the hell is it supposed to be about? It's not funny, it's not clever it's not laugh out loud silly, but I will forgive Judith Kerr because of When Hitler stole Pink Rabbit. I have read the first 2.5 Harry Potters and was thrilled when DS wanted to stop - I don't understand what grown adults see in them at all.
We are part way through my first ever David Walliams (serves me right for "forgetting" to send his book when he went to stay at Nanny's (the last few chapters of the final How to Train your Dragon book and after 6 months and 12 books I am far too over invested in Hiccup and the Dragons to miss the ending) - DS is punishing me by insisting on finishing the bloody awful Walliams pap before returning to the archipelago. I wish someone would make films of them that are actually of the stories!

Witchend, totally agree about Dick King Smith’s Sophie books. The writing is terrible - how often can one author use the word “plodding”?

Dislike Horrid Henry too - the film is much nicer.