Should I give the new baby my nieces bedroom

[newmummy0094]

Hello

I'm five months pregnant and I have just started thinking about where it is going to sleep.

So here's the dilemma. We have four bedrooms one of which is in the attic. Then there's one at one side of the house and two next to each other.

The two next to each other are the biggest apart from the attic one.
At the moment we have one of the two and my niece has the other.
She sleeps at my house every Friday to Saturday and also comes every Tuesday.
She also come when her parents go on a weekend away or on holiday which is probably every other month.

Me and my niece spent ages decorating it together and we went and got wall stickers and decorations.

The thing is I know that the bedroom is really important to her. However the other room is quite far from our bedroom and a lot smaller.

What should I do??

I think as a PP suggested this should be treated as a older sibling with new baby arriving scenario. No-one would suggest the older sibling would just have to accept they were no longer the priority! Parents mostly try very hard to make the older sibling feel secure when a new baby arrives.

I would imagine this is especially true in OP's case. Her niece has probably had some difficult times because of her mum's mental health and has forged a very close bond with her aunt. Extra care needs taking in this scenario. Not less!

Assuming, OP, that the baby will be in your room for first 6 months or so, I would absolutely postpone making any decisions about bedrooms until that is needed. You will then have a clearer idea of what would work best after your baby is here and home life is established.

Yes, there may be some changes to your niece's routine when your baby is born but I would prepare her just like an older sibling. Much nearer the time though. There are books you could read with her at bedtime about having a new baby in the house and how it might make her feel (positive and negative). I'd have a good Google of strategies to use with older siblings. As I say the solution to bedroom issue will become clear in about 10 months time.

Congratulations on pregnancy and you are all lucky to have each other, including your baby who will have a cousin who is like a sister to her.

My dd had the room next to us when ds was born.
Ds stayed in our room for about 6 months. Towards the end of that time we decorated the big room and she moved in there with her toys. We made it v exciting. At this point she had bonded with ds and helped as much as she could and wanted to with looking after him.
My dd was 4 , so the same age.
So I'd leave it until after the baby has arrived.
I also got lots of puzzle books to do with her whilst feeding the baby so she still had lots of time.
You sound like a brilliant aunt and sister.

@ovenchips
This was kind of my thinking.
My head says that my child should take priority however my heart says I should treat them the same. My niece has been like a daughter to me and I never want her to think that she isn't important.
Thank you for your comment

my heart says I should treat them the same. My niece has been like a daughter to me and I never want her to think that she isn't important.
This is lovely, your niece is very lucky. Go with your instincts. It’s hard for other people to understand the relationship and you obviously know your niece very well and what her needs are. Also, if your niece feels happy and secure, it will make things easier for you when you have them both as when children feel insecure/unhappy/jealous of new baby etc, that’s when they tend to play up and start misbehaving.

@littledinaco
Thank you that is very nice of you to say.

My first was in my bedroom for the first year as I couldn't bring myself to move them.

By that point your niece would be closer to 6? Do you think by then you could move her to the attic room?

I wouldn't worry about moving her just now but explain to her that her room is best for little children and that as she will be a grown up girl soon you'd like to give her a more grown up room. Let her get excited about decorating and tell her you'll need her help to make the baby room new again.