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Original poster

Is there someone who can talk to me??

116 replies

WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 06:54

Here I am again...in the same place I was a year ago. I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks and am on medication. I have to fly today on a 11 hour flight (with a break) and I haven’t slept all night. I’m crying my eyes out...I have thrown up twice and just a wreck, I have a 4 yo dd who is very excited and I cannot ruin the trip for her. But I just feel like I cannot do this...

OP posts:
caringiscreepy · 16/08/2018 08:38

Ah op feeling like that is truly horrible. I hate flying but not to that extent. There was a pilot AMA on this a while back and I found it really helpful. Definitely helped put my mind at ease if you can find it . Thanks

HonkyWonkWoman · 16/08/2018 08:38

I thought that with an 11 hour flight which you have to go on, you were moving abroad but after re-reading I see that this is a "trip", so there will be a return flight I presume.
All I can suggest is to look how calm all the other passengers and crew are, do you think that all these people would be putting themselves in danger.
No! They wouldnt!

You are only doing the same as everyone else and it is actually safer on a plane than say driving down the motorway and you presumably don't panic doing that.
Just rationalise with your mind, instead of thinking "this is dangerous", tell your mind the truth that flying is the safest sort of transport that there is!

Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 08:45

I am flying emirates

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Mishappening · 16/08/2018 08:47

I have not read the whole thread, so forgive me if this is repeated advice.

I have so much sympathy with you as I too hate flying. Unfortunately, all the knowledge that I have about how planes work, how the pilots do this all day every day etc. don't actually stop my brain going off on tangents that are distinctly unhelpful.

What does help is my trusty iPod. I have relaxation sessions recorded on there and use a headband speaker set-up, so that I can put it around my eyes and just focus inwards on the relaxation with no visual distractions. Every time I feel the panic rising I set the relaxation off again.

I know some people who get drugs from GP to help out. For me they are a mixed blessing as it does tend to disinhibit my fear and make me express it more vehemently! - but a larger dose does indeed have a sort of out-of-body effect that helps.

I also find that the presence of a child helps - you have to keep smiling and making sure they are OK.

I do hope you all have a lovely trip.

Mishappening · 16/08/2018 08:51

I am just about to set off on a 12 hour motorway journey, so please will no-one else say how unsafe it is!!!!!

HonkyWonkWoman · 16/08/2018 09:07

Mishap! Crossing the road is the most dangerous, so don't worry about it.
We didn't say that motorway travel was dangerous.
We said, that flying was statistically safer.
A completely different thing!

Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 10:17

Mishap that’s exactly where I am. Although all the messages here make sense it just feels so unreal in the world I am in

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Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 10:17

I have got as far as putting a few things into my bag

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LiveLifeWithPassion · 16/08/2018 10:29

I hate flying and get nervous (not anxiety).
I’m not sure if this helps you, but what helped me was finding out that at any given time, there are around 10,000 planes in the sky carrying over a million people.
If you look on a flight tracker site, you can see so many planes in the sky right now. How often does anything bad happen?
Then think about something else.

Every time negative thoughts come into your head, start thinking about something else. See if you can see 5 white/red/blue/green/yellow things in your room.
That might slow your anxious thoughts down so you can refocus on some practical stuff.

Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 10:40

Thank you Live. I am literally taking one step at a time.

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Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 11:07

I don’t think can do this...

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ShellsBells76 · 16/08/2018 11:19

Can you download a guided meditation from You Tube, a friend of mine swears by them for panic attacks.

Really try to focus on your breathing, big deep breaths slowly, what time do you need to leave?

Cabin crew will definitely help you they are trained to look after passengers who suffer with anxiety so don't worry about that.

StrangeLookingParasite · 16/08/2018 11:45

You can do this, you really can. You are the captain of this ship.
With the AD you started, it's not Prozac is it? I tried that and it was terrible for me (works brilliantly for a couple of friends, though).
Breathe. (this is going to sound ridiculous, but) Smell the flower, blow out the candle, that is, breathe deeply and evenly in through your nose, and deeply and evenly out your mouth.

You can do this.

Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 12:26

Strange- no it is not Prozac. But it is not working as in it makes me feel more depressed.
Shells- I tried the tapping method which one of the ladies suggested but I think I am too anxious to see the benefit.

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Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 12:32

I really feel lonely in all this. I don’t have anyone to talk to about all this which makes it worse for me.

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ShellsBells76 · 16/08/2018 12:43

It is very common to get heightening anxiety symptoms when you start a new medication, it will taper off but I know that doesn't help you now.

Are you keeping busy, distract yourself as much as possible, what do you still have to do today?

sashh · 16/08/2018 13:46

You have all of us to talk to, I know it isn't quite the same but we are here.

Stop thinking, 'I can't do this' because you ARE already doing it, you are packing a bag, you have booked tickets, got your passport etc.

One step at a time.

Come back at each step.

Agree with telling staff, they might be able to have someone sit with you for take off.

triwarrior · 16/08/2018 13:50

I’m so sorry, OP. I’ve had panic attacks and know how disabling they can be. What helps me is focusing on something to the exclusion of as much external stimuli as possible. Books and films mainly. Podcasts. Not music though - too much opportunity for my mind to wander. Wishing you peace.

Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 14:18

Sashh thank you...yes I hugely relying on this thread to keep me gong. I have managed to do pack my stuff and get dressed in between the panic attacks while putting on a brave face for dd. I keep reading all the messages over and over again to give me confidence and to keep me from having a breakdown

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ShellsBells76 · 16/08/2018 14:28

See you are stronger than you think, keep on going get what you need sorted, keep breathing slowly and focus on each thing you need to do.

Have you had some lunch, keep your strength up today.

abbsisspartacus · 16/08/2018 14:33

Practice slow deep breaths and count them in and out

Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 14:36

I’ve had a mug of tea but no lunch. I just don’t feel like eating anything. But as you say I am trying to take one step at a time.

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Original poster
WreckTangle111 · 16/08/2018 14:37

Thank you all for taking the time to post...you ladies are literally keeping me going.

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ShellsBells76 · 16/08/2018 14:47

Do you have much more to do today? It's pissing down here but if the weathers dry could you go out for a short walk, that always helps me focus a bit.

How's your DD is she excited?

Dancer12345 · 16/08/2018 14:48

Good luck. I have anxiety too, and don’t like flying. I take loads of things to distract myself. Break the journey down into chunks. Rather than seeing it as 11 hours, see it as one hour chunks. Even right then down and then tick off each hour if it helps, sometimes it seems more real if written.
Massive good luck, feeling anxious and panicky is so horrible. Fair dos to you for booking it, I might not have got that far! Think how proud you’ll feel when you’ve done it!