If your children are good, non-fussy eaters

[ProgressPenguin]

How did they get that way?

My DC are really fussy, eat a limited range of foods and hate vegetables. Now they’re both well into primary school age I want to
Improve things, and I’m just wondering what the most effective way is

I do think a lot of its luck tbh.
Both of mine ( 4 & almost 2) are pretty good eaters . We just gave them a wide range of foods from day 1 and they've always just had what we have. We also have the rule that you have to at least try something and I just persevere really. The 4yr old didn't like tomatoes until she was about 3 but every lunchtime we were having them I just popped a couple on her plate and every time they would come back untouched...until one day she tried them.. and now loves them!
I do wish I'd started her with spicy food earlier though as the merest hint of warmth has her clutching her tongue and declaring she can't eat another mouthful..

spinach,bacon and blue cheese salad.. he only tolerated broccoli under protest though that was the one thing I used to make him eat. (by bribery/making it non negotiable ..) I doubt he ever eats it after he left home, but I did my bit for healthy veg.. he says now that actually it wasnt that bad..

Luck! Our wonderful CM also feeds them a real mix.

I was fussy eater #1 until I was about 12 (I remember a lightbulb moment in a restaurant in France when I decided that I would eat everything...my DM still speaks of it with wonder as it was such a volt face) so don’t give up hope!

I have no idea of relivence or not but everyone I know who has a fussy eater is not the oldest sibling .

One fussy eater I know mum eats no fruit or vegetables and consequently dc doesn’t either.

My Ds is a great eater . He had his phases . Would only eat jar food at one time. But still re offered foods , limited sugars ( except yoghurts, hidden sugar and fruit till one ) weaned on savoury foods.

I am lucky

I think it's luck. My first was very fussy, would only eat certain textures etc. As a toddler she lived on eggs and yogurts. Broke my heart trying to get nutrients into her. My second ate everything except eggs, and I mean everything, he particularly loved vegetables. Next three were all pretty good. Even with the benefit of hindsight I really don't think that it was anything I did, or failed to do. My only advice is to offer a good range of nourishing foods, and try not to stress about what they don't eat. Easier said than done I know, but my fussy eater is grown up and very fit and healthy. I wasted so much time fretting over every spoonful that went into her mouth (it didn't help that she was underweight in her early years) when I should have just been enjoying her. Oh and my best eater, the one who loved vegetables has a very limited diet as an adult and is quite overweight. Go figure!

It just happened tbh. All 5 of them are good eaters and just get on with it. They understand that they don't always get their favourite meal but know at some point they will! They take it turns to help prepare food which some more than others enjoy.

We gave them a pretty wide range of food once we started weaning so they were introduced to a good variety before they reached any fussy age. Some they liked, some not so much but I had read that babies and toddlers need to try things a number of times before they get used to taste, texture etc so persevered. I do think some parents don't realise that's the case so might assume baby doesn't like X because they push it out of their mouth.

We never used jars of baby food. That's not a judgment but I've read that the processing results in the baby food becoming "caramelized" so the child gets used to food being quite sweet. I can see why that might make it harder to get them eating the home made version.

One piece of advice I was given was not to allow anyone to comment negatively or pull a face about any food I was making. So no "bleurgh fish" or "I don't eat broccoli" from anyone.

Tbh I think it's a mix of luck and effort. I know of people who have tied themselves up in knots trying to get a fussy eater to try new things without success. However I also know people who are very quick to introduce so called children's food - nuggets, fish fingers, chips, beans as the basis of their dcs diet and then wonder why that's all dc eat. The best advice I can give is to persevere but don't turn mealtimes into a battle.

Family food from an early age, no fuss if they didn't eat it. Just tried again another time. Diverse foods, wide range of ways presenting food. No children's menu for a long time. Small portions of main menu foods and offering tastes of ours. Even if we thought it might be too spicy or peculiar. Famous moment when 2 year old son insisted on trying bread dipped in olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Funny as fuck!

Luck.

My dc aren’t particularly fussy eaters and will eat most foods. I brought all 3 of them up the same regarding food - weaned on mostly homemade, occasional jar, got them to try loads of different things.
But their personal likes and dislikes can drive me mad. I only want to cook one meal but one child hates noodles and pasta, one hates all fish, one hates lentils, one hates cheese. I know those are genuine dislikes so I don’t force them eat those things but it still means I’m a bit limited for family meals.

My kids (5 & 2) are fantastic eaters, will eat absolutely anything, DS(2)’s favourite food is broccoli. I did BLW with both of them from 6mo. However, them not being fussy is absolutely luck of the draw, I’m sure of it.

This is very encouraging to read. I was actually going to start a post as my toddler has suddenly gone fussy with food. He'll always eat a good breakfast (porridge, fruit and toast) but lunch is a bit hit and miss and dinner is even worse. One day he'll eat loads of cucumber, the next he won't touch it. Right now, he'd happy live in fruit, yoghurt, garlic bread and toddler snacks (the latter he doesn't have very often either!). He's always been a great eater with a big appetite but overnight just won't even entertain certain meals. We do everything 'right'-- all eat dinner together, eat the same meals, a wide variety of meals, we ourselves eat a lot of veg, don't stress/bribe/make a fuss but inside I was still worrying. Rationally, he's eating plenty of good stuff (fruit, yoghurt, etc) and a good weight, and definitely growing well but this has thrown me for a loop. Its reassuring to see it's just 'one of those things' so hopefully it's just a phase and he'll grow out if it.

He's only 8, so maybe fussiness is to come; but like others, I've always just expected him to eat what I'm eating and try everything going. Never been the slightest bit cross if he didn't like something, even a whole meal; on the rare occasions it's happened I've reassured him that that's fine and given him something else. I can't actually think of a single thing he won't eat; and the only thing he's tried a few times and retained a dislike of is crackling.

And I agree it's largely a matter of luck. I was a very fussy child and consequently often hungry, since my mum refused to make any allowances for it! I grew out of most of it.

DC1 - blw on a wide range of home cooked foods, now very fussy.

DC2&3 - weaned on jars of mush, banana and yoghurt. Will eat anything and love vegetables.

My DS is pretty good really, eats a reasonable range of raw veg, carbs, & protein, eats what he needs then stops, loves cake biscuit & chocolate but seems to have an "off-switch" for them so he stops after a bit (I find this pretty impressive tbh!) Okay with spices. Would be nice if he ate more stuff with sauce in/was less insistent on stuff being separate and not mixed up, but he's only 5 and letting him have some control over his food seems reasonable. He will try new stuff occasionally, when he wants to.

My DPs DS is terribly picky. Never ever cleans his plate. Won't try new stuff even when asked several dozen times in one mealtime. Continuously rejects beautifully nutritious home cooked curry. Will receive a plateful of food & immediately demand something different. Keeps going "off" stuff he used to like.

Same child.

We talk about food: where it's from, how it grows, what it tastes like, different ways to cook it, what nutrients it's contains and how they help the body, what our favourite things are and what foods we limit and why. We cook together and eat together, we all eat the same thing and we compliment each others cooking regularly. We've always done this and our now three year old just wants to be a part of what's going on around him.

I was a desperately fussy eater in the 60s. My sensible dm could not get around me. I eat everything now.
When l had my own l literally never mentioned what we were having. We all sat together for every meal..chatted and no mention was made of the food. They never commented and spent the time just laughing and chatting and anything that was eaten was fine. Anything left was just taken away. I mean No FUSS.
They would eat stones. When we went on holidays abroad they ordered snails etc from a young age.
My parents were amazed mine were such good eaters as l had really put them through the mill. Looking back l realise l got a lot of attention for it and wonder if that was part of it in a big family. My dm was a great cook.

I am sure temperament and luck are important.
DC1 - nearly 4 years, very unfussy. Will almost always give things a go even if unfamiliar.
Was feeling vaguely smug until ...
DC2 - didn’t eat any solids until 1year, very reluctant to try new things. Would happily live off bread, yogurt and fruit. She’s nearly 2 now and has gradually been getting better in the last few months. We’ve tried not to make a fuss, just continue to offer things.

I always say to have hope though because I was a very very fussy eater as a young child and very small which caused my parents much angst. I got better as I got older and don’t think I’m at all fussy now.

I fed them the same as dh and I were eating from early on. Never really went down the nursery food route. I do not recall having chicken nuggets/fishfingers etc in the house they ate the same as us. Fruit and veg was offered daily. Desserts was not (and still now they are teenagers) a regular thing nor is yoghurts.
We do have sweets around and they have had of them fairly often. I never wanted it to be a matter of "this is nicer and I need to scoff it all now"..

Rather controversially I guess. I have never allowed the " I will eat toast/youghurt/dessert as I dont want whats for main course" If you cant eat the main you can't eat the perceived " nicer stuff"..

I have also within reason catered for genuine dislikes. DD 1 doesn't like mash potatoes. So when we have mash she gets boiled put aside. She doesn't like blended soups so I keep a non blended portion aside.

DD2 is vegetarian and has been for 4 years now. I will and do cater for that.

DS for many years was not keen on steak he would get a piece of Salmon if we had steak (not often)

DD3 doesn't care for tomatos as she has got older she has learned to tolerate them better but she is still not a big fan. She has always coped with them in a sauce but I still now at age 14 would not give her a salad with raw tomatoes in. For years she would not eat casseroles as she doesn't care for gravy. So if we were having casserole I would give her a couple of slices of bread with some of the meat.

However the whole " I dont like tubes of pasta only butterflies./ I only want carrots cut julienne not in circles.. " tough this is what is served today"

I will listen when you have genuine / regular issues. however if you simply do not fancy whats there and want something nicer.. not so much.

I have also from an very early age had the " what shall we have for dinner" conversations with the children so they know ok tonight it might be sausages and mash.. but tomorrow I will get the curry I wanted so much" type thing..

I have three nieces - two of them are so picky (the two that are sisters) I try and not pass judgement but anytime I'm round for dinner they eat little if anything but I do wonder is it because my brother then "rewards" them with a dessert/treat. I don't know why he does this as we weren't brought up like this. When they come to mine I make potatoes with meat/veg and they always eat it up - I only make it as I know the girls like it not because of my fondest for it. I have commented on how they like it ,the girls have said it's their favourite yet every time I am round it's the same story. Exact same when we go for dinner too for some reason he always orders them nuggets and chips and every time
I spend half my dinner removing the batter as neither of them like it ! I've tried saying to him numerous times but he doesn't seem to pick up on it or think it's a problem? Should I just ignore it as they aren't my children?

I can't answer from a parent point of view just what I experienced as a child.

Fussy eating was simply not tolerated in our household. If you didn't eat what was in front of you, you went to bed hungry. We were taught to be grateful for the food on our plates. There were no snacks or bread if we didn't eat our dinner. If you said you were hungry, the answer was 'you should have eaten your dinner then'.

BTW the fussiest in the house is DH. We ignore him he is old enough to cater for himself if he really hates it that much (rare he can be bothered)

DD1 is looked on by the others as fussy as she is less willing to explore foods. However now she is at uni she reports her friends is of the opinion she is very " un fussy" Logically I know she isnt that fussy she just prefers a more " British" diet where as her siblings are more a " world cuisine" personality

Eldest was a proper nightmare with food. I did all the right things, varies homemade food, eating as a family etc etc. At the age of 8 he ate fishfingers and chips, plain pasta with cheese and sausages and rice.

He’s nearly 16 now and eats virtually anything. For lunch today he had poached eggs with avocado on German rye bread. The other night he cooked me peri peri chicken with vegetable and tumeric rice and he eats sushi by the bucketful.

I can only hope my other 2 fusspots follow suit