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Original poster

If your children are good, non-fussy eaters

107 replies

ProgressPenguin · 12/08/2018 19:01

How did they get that way?

My DC are really fussy, eat a limited range of foods and hate vegetables. Now they’re both well into primary school age I want to
Improve things, and I’m just wondering what the most effective way is

OP posts:
ILoveMyDressingGown · 12/08/2018 20:24

They never were fussy. I don't think it's anything we've done right though. If anything, it's down to luck.
I didn't go down the baby led weaning route and just fed them the jarred purees as babies. As older toddlers they were in nursery 3+ days a week and ate what they were given. It possibly helped that the staff didn't fuss when they did or didn't leave anything and that they ate their meals with loads of other children who were all happy to eat what was on offer. As older children (who are still young though at 6&7) they don't get a choice at home (I can't do with the arguing when they disagree) apart from what they're given or nothing at all. I don't give them things I know they genuinely don't like though and I have never forced them to eat anything.

2up2manydown · 12/08/2018 20:26

I too offered a wide range of foods from weaning. Everything fresh and lovingly hand made. We ate together, tried to eat same meals where possible, talked about what we were making, have them a pot and spoon to stir etc etc etc

By a year each of my children became very fussy for no reason at all. They eat ok now but not brilliant. I give them what I know they like and we sneak vegetables in but they are not like these story book children who chow down on anything offered and are ordering steak and sushi off the adults menu by 3. No siree!

There no rhyme or reason and anyone pretending otherwise is just being smug.

MrsSnootyPants2018 · 12/08/2018 20:26

We've never let her pick what she wants for dinner

The rule is and always will be here is what's for dinner take it or leave it.

We also offered the same from early on including spices and now we've never had an issue with that either.

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MeanTangerine · 12/08/2018 20:33

On average, a child will reject a new food 14 times before they start liking it. Stick it on the plate, don't make a fuss if they don't eat it. Fussy eating is frustrating but also a very very normal part of child development.

SofiaAmes · 12/08/2018 20:34

I think it makes a difference if the parents are picky eaters and don't role model well for the kids. I eat everything and role modeled that for the dc's. As others have said, I did not let them pick dinner other than within some parameters that were all healthy and well rounded. Everyone eats what is at the table. I started giving them what we ate from the beginning (ie no bland baby food). Dd was a little funny about textures, but we worked around it and just kept re-offering the same thing in different ways and different combinations. It helps if you are a good and varied cook.

SofiaAmes · 12/08/2018 20:35

Yes, don't make a fuss. And DO NOT bribe your kids with food EVER. ie "if you are good you will get dessert."

SciFiFan2015 · 12/08/2018 20:37

Luck! My DS will eat anything, my DD not so much (though she has GORD). I tend to think of my DD as a fussy eater but she eats a wider variety of food than her all her friends and a wider variety of food than I did at her age! So it really is luck and it's a family perspective of her being fussy because her brother will eat (and try) anything.

SofiaAmes · 12/08/2018 20:37

Recipe suggestions: green beans, broccoli and courgettes taste really wonderful boiled (not mushy) and dressed with lemon juice, olive oil, garlic and salt. My step kids who hated vegetables started eating them after having them at my house.
Also kale sautéed with bacon and garlic (and a small dash of cayenne pepper) tastes amazing (Actually anything tastes good with bacon.)

SciFiFan2015 · 12/08/2018 20:40

Also OP I was a really fussy eater when young but this has radically changed over the years. e.g I hated tomatoes as a child but now I eat them like they are going out of fashion. I finally like avocado (last year!). However despite loving salmon, tuna, cod and mussels I can now no longer eat fish or shellfish after an allergic reaction ☹️
So be patient and keep offering new tastes.

DownstairsMixUp · 12/08/2018 20:43

My nearly 9 year old isn't fussy but he did go through a fussy phase. When he was in infants and had the free school dinners they give out, the fussiness seemed to go away. Now he eats anything, spicy things, halloumi... my 3 year old, however, lives on sausages, pasta and pizza 🙄

Leeds2 · 12/08/2018 20:45

My DD, now 20, was weaned on a wide range of foods, which she ate, but became the sort of child that wouldn't touch a vegetable, and only wanted fishmongers/chicken nuggets/chips/eggy bread/tinned ravioli or macaroni cheese. Having school lunches helped - I remember her coming home raving about omelettes - and then at 7/8 going to eat frequently at a friend's house where mum required vegetables to be eaten. And DD was afraid to say no! Mum used to give her raw carrot batons, instead of cooked, but DD soon progressed to cooked carrot, peas and broccoli. She is now a vegetarian!

Labradoodliedoodoo · 12/08/2018 20:45

When mine were little we had no beige food. It just happened that way. I gave them a couple of new recipies a week, would give them all sorts of adult meals and wouldn't offer anything else. They could leave food if they wanted, I didn’t mind how much they ate or left. My kids have only truely hated meals very occasionally.

iamjustlurking · 12/08/2018 20:46

I have 3DC 20 22 and 14 all 3 have been
fed the same home made food while weaning, offered wide variety of foods never forced but encouraged.
DC1 would never eat "lumpy good went from puree to finger food eats well always knew what she did and didn't like great fruit and veg
DC2 complete nightmare from start v selective eater ie 3 foods had to be right manufacturer etc struggles with Anorexia has improved variation loves fruit and veg
DC 3 will eat anything and everything apart from mushrooms Grin loves fruit and veg

Beamur · 12/08/2018 20:47

It's genetics/luck.
3 kids - one will eat anything, one will eat healthy but a restricted range, one was hopeless, would only eat beige, processed foods.
Fast forward a few years, unfussy still unfussy but has chosen mostly vegetarian diet, healthy but restricted is improving, really fussy much much better.
We offer nice, home cooked food, etc, no pudding offered as reward for eating, no treats/threats etc.
My only advice is to chill out, if kids are healthy weight and suffiently nourished all is well. Most kids grow out of it.

evilharpy · 12/08/2018 20:56

Mine is 3.5 and very unfussy. However she refused to eat solids at all until she was well past a year and didn't eat much of anything till she was about 18 months. She eats almost anything now and it's entirely down to luck and nothing to do with parenting or how we weaned her.

She has a few things she dislikes, including blueberries (which I thought all children liked but there you go) and some days she doesn't fancy whatever I've made for dinner but that's fine, we all have days like that, I won't make anything else but she can have a piece of fruit.

I feel lucky/grateful that I got a good eater as it makes life much easier; I see some of my friends having very stressful mealtimes. But I'm not at all smug about it as we really did struggle in the early days to get her to eat at all.

hazeyjane · 12/08/2018 21:00

One eats anything (although is veggie) - (good luck)

One is a bit fussy but eats most stuff (luck and personality)

One eats a very restricted diet (shit luck and a genetic condition)

ApocalypseNowt · 12/08/2018 21:02

When DC1 was little we participated in a study at a local university about weaning. Basically they were trialling a method of weaning, the point being a few years down the line children were meant to eat a wider range of vegetables.

It worked for (both) my DC who are like human dustbins when it comes to fruit and veg and the study showed it did work!

Here it is if anyone's interested study link

glintandglide · 12/08/2018 21:04

Full time nursery from a young age- something about communal eating, and the child focused food they’re cooked really helps! Not for everyone though, lol

Bestseller · 12/08/2018 21:04

It's just luck. DS1 will eat anything and everything and was weaned as suggested on a wide variety of flavours and textures. I was inclined to the kind of smugness some are exhorting here Grin

Then I had DS2, and weaned him exactly the same way and he's a very fussy eater like his dad!

Having done some research on the subject it seems that people's taste buds are different and some people taste things more (or less) strongly than others.

Cittadineve · 12/08/2018 21:05

I never make him eat anything he doesn’t like, never give foods as treats or say you have to finish dinner to get desert, encourage to try new things....but really I think a lot of it is luck/personality of the child

JemimaMuddledUp · 12/08/2018 21:09

Luck. Mine will eat anything, but I am under no illusions that it is anything to do with my excellent parenting skills. It's just the way they are. It isn't even genetic as I was a terribly fussy eater as a child.

Charley50 · 12/08/2018 21:10

Mine's 14 and has never been fussy or had food issues. Partly his temperament I suppose, but also I didn't give him lots of options at meals, but gave him 'adult' food from a young age, wasn't really fussed if he didn't eat things sometimes, didn't make alternative meals if he wouldn't eat something (unless he would have been left very hungry). He generally will eat/ try most things, although he won't even try soup, and doesn't like mushrooms.
Just don't make mealtimes a big deal or a battleground. (Obviously some children have sensory issues etc).

DunesOfSand · 12/08/2018 21:11

I lucked out on the eating. I missed out on the sleeping. 'Tis the luck of the draw.

justcontemplatingsomething · 12/08/2018 21:15

I've got a toddler so completely realise that things may well change, but my approach is to not make a fuss about eating. If she doesn't want to eat much then we just finish up with no fuss. She was in a habit of chewing food and then spitting it out and again I tried not to make a fuss. That doesn't happen too often now. Some days she eats really well and some days she doesn't. She does eat a lot of fruit and vegetables, that's probably just by luck.

I've heard good reports about the Gentle Eating book.

Laska5772 · 12/08/2018 21:16

Ds ( now 27) refused all pureed foods on weaning,(he was BF) and as far as i know has still never eaten a potato in any form (inc chips!) but would eat things like raw carrots , apple ,red peppers cuecumber from about 6 months.
He never liked any cooked vegetables and still doesnt , but raw are fine . His favourite salad was spinach broccoli and blue cheese with garlic oil from quite a young age and he could never understand why other kids (or even his mates now) dont like it !

I was a vegetarian when I got pregnant with him but at about month 6 the craving for a ham sandwich became totally unbearable and I went back to meat..It was him! DS is a total carnivore! loves all meat and always has .. but no sauces gravy what so ever ( and is still the same, except nowadays, he loves a curry )