What to do with kids when staying in other peoples boring houses abroad

[Branleuse]

Especially with language barrier.

We have to go and stay with dps mum for possibly up to a week. Its not walking distance from anywhere interesting. There will probably be a lot of time spent just in the house. We will hopefully do a day out at a theme park but what on earth do you do to keep kids occupied. Theyre french. My french is intermediate. I cant do interesting conversations in it and his mum doesnt appear to do interesting conversations full stop.
Im imagining a week of playing on our phones or reading , but then i feel worried we will be judged. Kids will watch a bit of french telly but they dont follow it that well.
Any tips on things we can do in a boring house for a fucking week without their own stuff?

but people do live perfectly happily in a suburb of Basildon.

Well exactly! What suburbs don't have pubs, cafes, shopping centres, parks and so on. Not to mention "suburb" suggests a city centre nearby so bound to be transport links even if you're reluctant to drive.

I just don't get the "staying in other people's boring houses". What house is exciting?? I've certainly never gone to fetch a jacket and fallen through to Narnia in mine or anyone else's house . I think Op needs to shake herself up a bit!

I also think £600 isn't that expensive for a weeks sanity and your own space to to escape to.

If you can't do it this time, definitely consider for the future. When staying with relatives just hasn't worked for us we have chosen to either rent our own place or do very long day trips instead.
Some of DP's relatives sound plain rude (making fun of your French).

Find the local Tourist office (most French towns have one even if not really touristy), and get lots of leaflets.
Even things like a walk in the woods, rowing a boat in the park etc. would break up the days.
But you do all sound as if you need time apart to recharge.

Library? Free WiFi, magazines, reading..

I live in France. Around here grandparents take charge of the grandchildren for the duration of the holidays. Leave the DCs, and the DH if he can’t be separated from his family, and go have a break for yourself. Mamie should be perfectly capable of entertaining the grandchildren herself.

Uno is a great game to play.

The kids are old enough to be taken out on adventures without dp now. Instill in them an enthusiasm for exploring. You may have to fake your own enthusiasm first. Fake it till you make it. Get on a bus, change buses and go and see some of the countryside or other local places. Take a picnic. There must be places that locals would go to for a day out.
Get the kids involved by looking at time tables, using the internet to find nice walks or things to do. Get them involved in nagging dp to drive you all to places. Even if he doesn't want to go swimming for example, he could drive you there and pick you up later.

The world is out there for you and your kids to grab, but it won't come to you. It's up to you to go and find it. I'd do it with no French. You have an advantage when if you think it isn't fantastic.

Embrace the opportunity. Make it a mission to instil confidence in your kids even if you don't feel it yourself.

Check out summer activities on the local town hall website. There will be some. And the local library. Probably in walking distance. Enjoy some films together with Mamie - Jacques Tati, Mr Bean's holiday, Petit NicolaS - no great language skills needed, mostly slapstick and might get Mamie reminiscing about old days, her childhood...

Thanks for all the replies, especially the ones that "get it" they make me feel less alone. Well we are here. Its ok. DPs sister was here last night which was nice as she speaks english. Shes at work now as is MIL and guess what.... dp is working from home. The joy! We visited his grandmother for lunch. Shes lovely and nice to see her. Now back. Dp is working. House is in silence. Didnt even manage to get board games but am going to look in a bit. Dp is giving me short snappy answers to everything as he is stressed and grumpy to be here. Next time im just going to insist he does this on his own tbh. If he cant make the children come with him without me then thats his own fault for not pushing the grandparent relationship when they were younger or speaking to them in french enough so they learned it naturally. Hes spoke to them in english ever since they were about 3 even though he spoke to then in french until they started responding in english, at which stage he stopped the french and surprise surprise they now cant converse with their grandparents and arent as eager to come.

600 is not expensive for a weeks holiday somewhere you want to go. Its not an amount of money to just throw away either though.
Im understanding though that there are dynamics in my relationship, my partners relationship with his family and my families neurodiversity which are massively contributing to the negative way i feel about this. Ive been here less than 24 hours. It hasnt even been that but i feel absolutely desperate to go home.
The more i say here the more i feel like im having to go into details I really didnt want to and make explanations that are being poopooed. I actually cant help some of this stuff truly and its making me feel broken. I should have saved this for my counsellor instead.
Thanks anyway.

I have a very poised, confident friend who really struggled with this kind of set up, and she was like a new woman when she and her DH agreed to do different holidays. I think they brought the family members over to theirs instead, basically by the DH going over and travelling with them.

I'd be pretty unimpresed that your DH is WFH but maybe it's a sign that it's not working for him either. Chin up, plough through some of the ideas on here this week, and start planning for next year to be different.

OP get your shoes on, tell the kids 'we're heading out' go for a walk - find a bus stop - head into town or get a taxi Find a cream tea.

Your DH treats these trips as if he's trading your home for 'his home' and doesn't get that it's a holiday!!!

Take them out and come back full of tails -

Agree. Find a local destination, download a map and directions and head out - park, pool, cafe, hill. Make it into a mini adventure, so one child has map and other directions.

I know youre trying to be helpful but me taking my two autistic kids out on an adventure on a bus in suburbia sounds really stressful. We even struggle all going out together locally at times. I mean it might be alright because at least i dont have my eldest with us as that really would be a nightmare.
Dp is not being particularly understandjng. Hes just accused me of this being my idea and that he really wanted to do a hotel but i suggested we just stay here. He is fucking deluded or gaslighting me because he knows full well i dont like being here, but when he discussed it with me he said stuff like maybe we could get a pool and take it to my mums, it would still be cheaper than staying in a hotel with a pool, and i said yeah maybe, or maybe it wouldnt be so bad just for a few days. Hes now saying I was the one who wanted to stay here. so i just said well lets pack up and go to a place with a pool then, and he said " what and insult my mum?"

Im so done with the whole thing

If he's saying he wanted a hotel you could develop a sudden interest in a day out a bit further away and use that as an excuse to get a night away, as suggested upthread. But it might not be worth the stress of changed plans now.

You're both wound up and he's lashing out. Don't get into whose fault it is, use it as an opportunity to get on the same team and make next year different.