Would you be mad?

[FuckDietCoke]

If one of your closest friends showed your DP her new underwear (just to clarify she wasn't wearing it, it was in a bag and she pulled it out)

DP went to my best friends house to drop off a cutlery set I received as a gift that I won't use but she would - he was passing by and offered. He immediately rang me after and said something weird has happened, X has been shopping and has got some underwear, she got it out and said "do you like this underwear set MrFuckDietCoke" He said he felt really awkward, didn't really know what to say and mumbled something about having to get back to me!

Said friend has also made a few comments about me in the past but thought nothing of it until now

What kind of comments?

I think it depends on the nature of the friendship I.e if she had been close friends with your DH since being a teen I'd probably think that's fine.

But a not that close friend of yours? Odd. I'd find it quite attention seeking behaviour

Unless she has a bf /dh who is going to appreciate the undies then she was bu to be fishing for comments from your man!! I would let her know he told you in a light hearted way so she doesn't think she has smugly done it behind your back.

It would make me laugh! Some women are silly when it comes to men. Mr Crumbs has had a few odd offers in his time but it is a reflection on the sad women who thought they had fallen in love with a perfect man - when truth is he'd just been kind, charming or witty. No need to fret if you trust your man.

sarcasm she made comments when he first asked me out on a date such as "YOU are being taken out by MrFuckDietCoke" Before me and DP knew each other, she decided to spill the beans to him about a guy I had slept with a few months before (despite me begging her not to tell anyone). Not sure why she told him!

Another was "FuckDietCoke is lovely, she lied a few times about her ex boyfriend but she's alright" I did lie about seeing him, but more I didn't want her to get involved anymore!

I did laugh at first, then my hairdresser said with her being the way she is I'd pull her up on it!

She's been single for years, never known her to have a boyfriend in over seven years so it can't be for someone in particular I can't imagine!

She's after your man, OP. Bit of a last resort showing him her underwear, but she sounds frustrated she hadn't got him earlier.

imperial that thought crossed my mind a while back, told myself I was being silly and that she's just over friendly. she's my best friend

I think to keep the friendship, you have to confront her. It might be that she's very lonely and wants to meet someone and acted stupidly. On the other hand, other things could come out (I'd be very unhappy at her belittling you earlier.)

I've distanced myself since DP told me about her comments earlier on in our relationship. They hurt and no good would come from her telling him those things.

I think she's a very over friendly person and has been known to over step the mark with other taken men. I didn't want to over react but clearly a conversation needs to be had.

Before me and DP knew each other, she decided to spill the beans to him about a guy I had slept with a few months before (despite me begging her not to tell anyone). Not sure why she told him!

This is very worrying. Why would she do that except to damage your chances with him? I don't think she's a good friend to you.

She's after your man!

imperial that was exactly what I said to DP. What good could possibly come out of her telling you that? Non! I also wondered who else she'd told... the night after the ONS I begged her not to tell anyone. At this point DP was just a mutual friend, we had no real conversation yet she still told him?

dontdoit it seems so clear now it's all typed up

I'm sorry to say this OPbut she's not a very good best friend.

I'm really sorry OP but I agree with the others above. She's not your friend. She wants your man.
I would definitely let her know that you know about the underwear, to make it very clear that your hubby doesn't hide anything from you.
It can be done lightheatredly - 'I hear you've been on an Ann Summers shopping spree' etc. Kight hearted, but enough to make her realise that you know.