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Original poster

Not got paid for tutoring??

28 replies

lolipop2405 · 19/12/2016 21:15

So I have been tutoring for a pupil for over a year, and they usually pay me each week.
However last week, they gave me some lovely Christmas gifts, and in the flurry of me going out to my car with the presents I didn't realise till I got home that I hadn't been paid.

Then I began to think that the presents were instead of a payment this week, and now am embarrassed to ask the Mum for last weeks payment!

What would you do? Do I just wait until I go again this week and mention that I didn't get paid last week? Or did I get paid and I've dropped it in their front yard? Or do I leave it and say nothing, and get paid as normal this week, incase they meant gifts as payment?!

Please advise!! Thank you

OP posts:
MinesAGin · 19/12/2016 21:21

This is where texts come in handy. Just say, "Hi X, thank you so much for the lovely gift. I hope you have a lovely Christmas. It was only when I got home that I realised I didn't have the tutoring money with me - do you know if I left it there? Sorry, losing my head in all the Christmas rush! Thanks xx"

Original poster
lolipop2405 · 19/12/2016 21:28

Thank you for your reply.

I guess I'm worried about her having to say " oh actually, the gifts were your payment this week" and then I've put my foot in it and seemed ungrateful for the gifts.

Also this happened last Thursday, I'm only writing now because she texted me tonight regarding this weeks visit, and it reminded me that I hadn't got paid.

So I text her now even though it's been a few days?

Thing is, I genuinely don't know if I dropped it, but I am SURE I didn't see it on the table/handed to me, etc, but it could have be amongst the gifts and fell on the ground, but then she would have found it later?!

Oh I don't know!!! ConfusedBlush

OP posts:
mummymummums · 19/12/2016 21:33

It seems very unlikely that someone would give you a gift instead of payment - that's not their decision to make! I'd be mighty upset if I wasn't paid for work I did and was given a gift instead. I'm sure the gift was a gift not in lieu of payment!
I'd do what gin says, sounds like an oversight but if they're adamant they gave it to you and it seems you dropped it you'll have to suck it up I feel.

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mummymummums · 19/12/2016 21:34

It seems very unlikely that someone would give you a gift instead of payment - that's not their decision to make! I'd be mighty upset if I wasn't paid for work I did and was given a gift instead. I'm sure the gift was a gift not in lieu of payment!
I'd do what gin says, sounds like an oversight but if they're adamant they gave it to you and it seems you dropped it you'll have to suck it up I feel.

Original poster
lolipop2405 · 19/12/2016 21:38

Thanks, I might give her a wee text, hope I don't offend her!

Thanks for your replies.

OP posts:
bloodyteenagers · 19/12/2016 21:42

They cannot opt to give you gifts in lieu of payment. Gifts do t pay your bills

BizzyFizzy · 19/12/2016 21:44

Send an invoice, not a text.

Finola1step · 19/12/2016 21:46

I'm a tutor. Gifts as payment would be highly unusual. Text so that the situation has been raised before the next lesson.

FWIW "payments as gifts" would result in me giving notice pretty sharpish.

Original poster
lolipop2405 · 19/12/2016 22:09

I have text her, asking if I'd dropped it at her house, because as I've said above this is a possibility.

She's said she hasn't noticed it but will go and check and ask her husband.

So it seems as though she is sure she paid me, and no mention of the gifts instead of presents, thankfully!

But still doesn't explain the missing money.
Looks like I'll have to forget it. HmmSad

OP posts:
steppemum · 19/12/2016 22:15

I tutor, I often get gifts, eg at Christmas, they are never in lieu of payment. BUT people do occasionally forget if something comes up at the end of a lesson.
hope it gets sorted

Original poster
lolipop2405 · 19/12/2016 22:27

So she has confirmed again that no one in her house has found money, and to let me know if/when I've found it.

I will check again in my car/bag of books but I'm sure I have checked already.

Oh well, I do feel better having asked her, but if she is sure she gave it to me then it must be my mistake.

When I search tomorrow I'm pretty sure I won't find anything. Do I then admit to her that I haven't found it or do I say, "yep, silly me it was here all along" so that we can drop the awkward conversation?

I don't want her to feel obliged to pay me again, that would be awful!

OP posts:
notagiraffe · 19/12/2016 22:35

I hope you find it. But never ever think that presents are OK instead of payment for work agreed.

Finola1step · 20/12/2016 00:08

If there is a possibility that she did pay you and you dropped it or lost it, then you will need to take the hot on this one. Check through everything relating to that child in case the money
turns up.

OzzieFem · 20/12/2016 01:11

Does she usually pay you or the husband? They may think the other person has paid you if you actually asked if you had dropped it, when in fact neither of them did.

OlennasWimple · 20/12/2016 01:22

Do you not recall at all whether the money was handed over in whatever is the usual way?

I'm 99% certain that the gifts were not in lieu of the money you are owed. The problem with the text was that it implied that you were given the money but have now misplaced it, not that you were never given it in the first place...

smurfit · 20/12/2016 01:30

Gift and payment are two entirely different things. Suggesting you lost it by asking her to look reinforces a perception that she gave it to you originally making it your own problem and not hers. You might have to suck it up this time and next time say that amongst the mayhem, she forgot to pay you.

trinitybleu · 20/12/2016 07:59

I'd text back and check who gave it to you and how i.e. cash / cheque, 20's or 10's, envelope/loose. Make them double check they did hand it over ("was it in an envelope as usual, love?", "I don't know, you sorted it, didn't you?", "ah")

MinesAGin · 20/12/2016 09:24

Just text back, "Can you remember which room we were in when you gave it to me? I can't find it here."

viques · 20/12/2016 09:29

Oh dear, I think you have given them an out by suggesting you dropped the money. all you can do now is to say, "apologies for making you search but on consideration I realise that you didn't actually pay me at all ! Can we settle up when I come round on x"

ChuckSnowballs · 20/12/2016 09:36

How do they normally pay you?

You need to change your system, and invoice them and get them to pay it straight into your bank account.

anotherdayanothersquabble · 20/12/2016 10:46

Don't skirt round the issue. Say you do not remember her passing you the money, only realised when you got home that you did not have it and could please pay you for both sessions next week.

Original poster
lolipop2405 · 20/12/2016 12:11

Normally they give it loose, with it folded over. It's usually sitting on the side of the table where we work.

Except this week we were through in a different room, and there was no money sitting out. She gave me the gifts at the end, And do not recall seeing the money at all. However it may have been in amongst the gifts and dropped, and that's where I am not sure.

I will speak to her again when I go this week as she will be asking me if I found it. I will ask her where she left it and then I might be able to trace it again!

OP posts:
lottieandmia · 20/12/2016 12:23

You should ask them to pay you by bank transfer - that way you can prove whether or not you received it. Surely you wouldn't have dropped money?

Finola1step · 20/12/2016 20:38

I know this doesn't help now, but when I'm paid in cash for tutoring, I always provide a written receipt. This helps me keep track of what has been paid for tax purposes. Receipt book cost just a few quid in WH Smiths.

INeedNewShoes · 20/12/2016 20:41

All of my pupils pay by bank transfer in monthly instalments. I don't know how I'd keep track of it otherwise! It also means that I never have to have awkward conversations about money.

I hope you find it OP!

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