Shit week, Shitty BF!

[hettiebaby]

Hi Ladies,

Feeling a bit ridiculous but could you tell me if im being silly.

This week has been horrendous. There's been a death in the family and i have felt really sick since about Wednesday. Due to this i thought i would be having an evening in with my boyfriend generally getting a bit of sympathy and support.

Instead however he has gone out on a lads night out!!

Now this night has been planned for a while but considering the last week i was hoping/expecting him to spend the evening together. Am i expecting too much to want my boyfriend to put me first after such a crappy week. Should I get a grip and let him just enjoy his evening or am i in anyway justified in feeling upset and quite annoyed.

Hmmm, the thing is, when you "assume" that pre laid plans will be set aside, unless you make it pretty clear, it's kind of a trap for him to blunder into......

I did make it clear i told him exactly how i felt. In the past ive thought things but not actually communicated it, then been cross when nothing has changed. That was unfair. This time i spelt it out very clearly how i felt.

'A death in the family' - that is quite vague - was it a close relative or some long lost auntie? And also feeling sick. Hmm not quite sure what he could do to help with that.

To be honest it sound like you just wanted him to put you first but from his point of view he has a planned night out and he probably doesn't realise why this is a big deal for you. I would look closer as to why you feel the need to make him prove you are first in his life?

It was someone who meant a lot to me and will be hugely missed.

As for feeling ill, generally in a relationship you look after one another when they feel under the weather. Like i always do when he is off colour. I'm miffed that the same isn't reciprocated.

Good Enough - I dont "need" him to prove anything to me, just some sympathy and being there for me would have gone a long way to making me feel better after such a horrendous week. Is it bad I wanted to feel as if his priority wasn't going out to get drunk maybe i am wrong.

Well it really depends how ill you are. Feeling sick would mean a early night and a film for me and I wouldn't need or want my dh to cancel a night out but it clearly is different for you.
Also my dh rarely goes out so depending how often he is out with his mates would potentially change my view too.