Kids Home Alone?

[northernmusgrave72]

I have a dd who will be 15 next month and a ds who is 11. After years of being self employed and struggling to meet the mortgage and pay bills, I have finally been offered a job that will put an end to our financial worries. It's more than double what I currently earn.

However they want me to start full-time at the start of the summer holidays. We have 2 weeks of holiday booked with the kids so that's not an issue. We are also thinking of asking grandparents to have them for 2 weeks but for one week we are stuck. My husband will be home for one of the days which leaves us with 4 days.

All the summer activities are full and most start at 10am and end at 4pm anyway and I will be working 20 miles away working 9-5.

So we've 4 days when they will be home alone and no family nearby who can keep an eye on them.

Plus there are the days when they are at school. My ds starts secondary in Sept and I will be there to see them both off in the mornings, but after school they will be home alone from around 3:30 until 6pm at the latest when I get in. I will look at after-school clubs for my ds.

My question is - what do other full time working parents do? Family live 200 miles away and we don't have good enough friends nearby either. Most of the parents of other children at ds' school do leave their children with other mums, who I don't know, or with family so there's no-one I can ask to have ds for me.

My daughter should be ok at 15 but I still worry about leaving them for long periods of time.

Any ideas as to how I can manage this?

Do they get along fine? Will they have your mobile number? Are the neighbours approachable?

Assuming all yes, I would not worry (in the slightest) about 4 whole days over summer break & lots of days after school. Doubt you'll find 100% after school cover for your 11yo, btw.

Congratulations on the job - what lovely news!
As long as they're reasonably sensible for their ages I wouldn't worry.

Thanks for answering. Yes they will have my number and both will have their own mobile phones in case anything happens with school transport.

Yes neighbours will keep an eye on them

They do get along fine but there have been moments. They want to be able to play out for instance, until I get back but I'm frightened of one of them having an accident and I'm not there.

Just everything is going through my head, all the paranoid possibilities. So I really need reassurance that they will be ok and maybe some ideas from other parents as to how this can be successfully organised so they aren't vegging out in front of the TV all day.

Ok you need to let them play out while you`re home - they will tell you any difficulties and let you know how they handled them ... DS 10 thought we werent home a couple of weeks ago, no phone, and walked to a friends home to call. This gave me confidence in him. He also solved a lost key issue by going out the back door taking that key and climbed over the gate. If its a serious accident then you arent going to be any use anyway! Lots if people would be able to handle this until you get there and if they are with friends they are safe enough. Kids do veg. But then so do adults - under valued skill!!

You are all putting my mind at rest - thank you! I've always been there for them; I've not worked full time since my daughter was born and the travel adds another 45 mins each way to my day.

It will be tough but with them both being at secondary I just hope they manage and are ok.

One question - after school clubs. Most of them end around 4:30 but if you are working full-time you can't pick them up. So how do other parents get around this? I want ds to join a couple of after-school clubs but I'm not sure how I'd get him home?

I would leave them.

In the holidays for that week you can pay for them to go to cinema/ swimming etc which will pass a few hours

At 11 years they will be expected to find own way home after school clubs. Most 11 year old live miles from school and take train or bus home daily once at secondary school alone. If he has a club a few days until 4.30pm, and by the time he's home there will only be a hour or so until your home anyway

15 year old is fine.

To help with future holidays maybe encourage both to sign up to a club like scouts or something they enjoy hobby based. That will also pass an afternoon or two throughout the year and things like scouts usually have a few week long or couple of day events during school holidays so that helps for those days

They will be absolutely fine, especially the 15 year old. You may like to think about arranging some play dates for the younger child, and offer to return the favour sometime - that's what we used to do. But if that's not possible, how about sneaking the older one a crafty tenner to keep an eye on his brother for the few days?

You can bet your bottom dollar that, left unattended, they'll be in bed until at least lunchtime at least, so that's half the time gone!

Leave them somthing to eat that is either sandwiches, or something they can easily heat up themselves.

My DDs were at frequently at home on their own once they'd started secondary school, and loved it.

Thanks :)

Ds' school will be out of town so he'll have to get one bus into town and then another to where we live. Not easy.

That's part of the problem, we live in a semi-rural location so it's difficult to access cinemas, leisure clubs, etc without a car.

But I do feel so much better about leaving them now :)

...so they aren't vegging out in front of the TV all day.

I'd be fine if mine did, it's only 4 full days that they possibly could.