and I don't know how to tell her mum. DD is 6 and is reasonably friendly with this girl at school but they're not best friends. I don't know her mum that well but I don't agree with her smoking in front of kids/at home (she also smoked when pregnant) and I don't want DD to go to her house. She has been to her house once, to a b'day party and I was pretty shocked when I picked her up and clouds of smoke came out when the front door was opened. I've also overheard the mum at the local shop discussing how she threw her partner out of the house recently as he had hit her. I don't want to offend the mum or make the little girl feel bad but there is no way she is going there (dh agrees). What can I say? She will probably see DD going home with other friends after school from time to time, so I can't say she's too tired after school. I did think about asking her here instead but I think it's just delaying the inevitable as it'll probably be reciprocated at some point.