Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Leaving kids in a hotel room, while we go to dinner.

109 replies

Confuzzeled · 02/01/2011 14:13

We are going away for a night this weekend, it's a small hotel with 10 rooms. The dining room is on the ground floor and our room will be above it. The hotel owner tells us that the family room is close enough for monitors to work should we wish to use one.

Now I just don't know how I feel about leaving my 3.9 yo and a 16 mo in a hotel room while we jolly off downstairs for dinner, it doesn't seem right. DH likes the idea but I don't know if I'm being a paranoid mummy or not.

My parents think it's fine and told me they used to leave us in a room with the phone off the hook and every 15 mins they'd go and listen at the reception phone.

Has anyone else done this?

OP posts:
HaveAHappyNewJung · 02/01/2011 14:14

I wouldn't.

MissQue · 02/01/2011 14:18

I must admit I read the thread title and thought of Maddie McCann, but I think if you're only downstairs and have a monitor on you the whole time, then it should be ok as long as the room is safe and secure.

crystalglasses · 02/01/2011 14:19

I have never done it - too worried that something might happen eg stranger coming into the room; child waking up and frightened because in a strange room or getting out of bed and having a wander.
My mind would run riot - would you leave the door locked or unlocked?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families Holidays
Original poster
Confuzzeled · 02/01/2011 14:22

I hadn't even thought of that Crystal, I guess we'd have to lock the door.

I just don't think I'd be able to relax at dinner.

OP posts:
IAmReallyFabNow · 02/01/2011 14:23

I wouldn't do it. Locking the kids in is stupid idea, there could be a real problem and they need to get out.

shinyshoes · 02/01/2011 14:25

Me too MissQue.

My thought after reading the title was Madeline McCann

Personally if it were me I wouldnt

Original poster
Confuzzeled · 02/01/2011 14:26

Good.

Glad I'm not just being paranoid.

I'm not doing it.

OP posts:
crystalglasses · 02/01/2011 14:27

Yes, I agree with Iamreallyfabnow - there are dangers whether you lock or unlock. The counter argument to all this is that we quite happily leave children upstairs in bed when we are at home. However I would still feel very uncomfortable doing it in a hotel, even a small one.

MyDingaling · 02/01/2011 14:27

I wouldn't in case there was a fire.

hatesponge · 02/01/2011 14:27

I wouldn't do it, I'd rather eat with the children there tbh.

bibbitybobbitysantahat · 02/01/2011 14:28

I wouldn't but not because of child abduction! I just think a 16 month old would be very frightened if he or she woke up in the night and no-one was there. (It is for this reason that I cannot fathom why the McCann's and their friends thought it was ok to do this to their toddlers - and they weren't even in the same building, but we've been through all that before).

scurryfunge · 02/01/2011 14:28

I used to do it when DS was immobile but as yours are old enough to get out of bed and wander around, I wouldn't do it now.

upahill · 02/01/2011 14:29

We didn't.

Ours were young well before the Madeline McCann case but we were concered about them waking up in an unfamiliar room and being uneasy or frightned.

To us the kids always come out on meals. We sort of compromised - They were out a little later than they would be if they were at home and we were in earlier than we would have been without kids- But it was the price we were prepared to pay for being parents.

We used to go back to the hotel/ appartment whatever and once they settled down open a bottle of wine and be with them.

They are only young for a short time even if it doesn't always feel like it.

cornsilkcornedbeefhash · 02/01/2011 14:31

don't the hotel have babysitters they can contact?

Tee2072 · 02/01/2011 14:32

I think the argument 'but you do it at home' is false as at home they are in their own room, which they know. Not waking up in a strange place without a grown up around.

So, no, I wouldn't do it.

onimolap · 02/01/2011 14:35

I've done it, but only after conducting my own path loss trial with my own baby monitor from the exact table, and ensuring we really can hear into the room well enough.

It's better IME experience than a baby listening service as you can be listening all the time (even the most diligent receptionist won't be paying attention all the tine, and the dial-in services miss too much).

It also means you can keep bedtime at a time that suits them, not the dining room's hours.

TrillianAstra · 02/01/2011 14:35

If you woul within monitor range then you would hear if they woke and were scared, and be able to run up the stairs pretty quickly.

KittyTwoShoes · 02/01/2011 14:39

Like MissQue my first thought was of the McCanns.

I wouldn't do it.

fruitstick · 02/01/2011 14:44

I have done it. In a pub with rooms above.

That was pre maccans though. Not sure i would now.

But only you can assess the situation once you get there and see what the set up is.

Can people walk I and out of the jotel unnoticed?
What would you di if there was a fire?

DanceInTheDark · 02/01/2011 14:45

No i wouldn't. When are the children eating?

upahill · 02/01/2011 14:49

Once upon a time I would have poo- pooed the idea of a hotel fire and thought what are the chance of that happening.

However a few years ago my mum and her mate were stoping at The Grand (I think, could be wrong) in LLandudno and they were evacuated due to fire.

A couple of years ago an arsonist set fire to the Moat house in Bolton and an elderly couple died.

Would I want to be seperated from kids for the sake of a meal. I don't think so.

SparkleandShine · 02/01/2011 14:50

I think the only circumstance is in a very small hotel, where you are close to the room and have them on a monitor.

FWIW i do this with our two, very similar situation, and basically you hear them on the monitor if they wake, and get back to them quickly.

We've done this with DS1 aged 1 own 2 on his own and with DS1&2 ages 4 and 1.

The fire situation is no different to at home, you would go up to get them. You lock them in to avoid wandering issues.

BUT very small hotel ONLY, ALWAYS check the monitor works.

NEVER leave in a big hotel or more than a 20 second dash away.

KnackeredCow · 02/01/2011 14:51

I don't think I would do it, but as I don't have children it's difficult to put myself in your position.

what makes me wary is that DH's parents did this when he was about 14 months old. He was a bad sleeper as a baby, and they believe he woke up when they were at dinner and jumped around in the cot a lot. This was in 1979 so there was no monitor in the room and PiL were checking on him every 15 minutes.

During this time, the cot collapsed and he became trapped next to a hot radiator. He suffered third degree burns down the back of his legs. Obviously, he was screaming, but nobody heard. I guess it would be different today with a monitor, but then how long would it take to get to a room if there was an accident?

Incidentally, when my DH reached 19 and was at Medical School, he was at a law lecture when he discovered that he could sue for damages. He attempted to sue the cot manufacturer, but they had gone out of business. However the hotel was still operational. He sued and won.

Anyway, I guess I am saying I am not so worried about abduction as it's very rare and the room could be secured, it's more the risk of an accident when you aren't there.

Original poster
Confuzzeled · 02/01/2011 14:51

We used to take dd out with us up till we had ds, she used to quite happily go to sleep in a buggy. Ds is the opposite, he needs darkness and quiet or he's a wee demon baby.

They start dinner at 7 in the hotel and thats their usual bedtime. Usually when we go away we get an appartment, but dh thought he was being sweet booking a posh country hotel.

OP posts:
Mapley · 02/01/2011 14:58

Oh ffs, you lot are too paranoid and too cut and dried. Can't believe when anyone asks this questionpeople shout madeline mcann!

Make a decision when you see the hotel, each situation on it's own merit. Some places it would be apprpriate in, others it wouldn 't.

I've done it before and some tips I'd give would be.

Go with your instinct on the particular hotel.

Test the monitor works through breakfast or some other timeframe, by putting on music in room and listening to it in dining room.

Check with hotel about fire alarms etc.

Position the baby monitor carefully by the door so if it's opened the the monitor will be knocked flying and you'll hear a loud bang on the monitor.

If you and dp have iPhones, download a baby monitor app and leave one phone in the room to call the other phone if a noise happens.

Take it in turns to check every course.

Swipe left for the next trending thread