Emigrate for a "better life abroad" or stay....

[MrsJessRabinovitch]

...where everybody you love lives?
This is not an immediate decision but it is one of those things that I really don't know what to do and am curious as to what others would do & for those that have emigrated how they got on?

I have 3 DS's and DH & I have been considering emigrating to Canada for a couple of years-he was made redundant in November (although does now have a new job) and whilst unemployed & looking for other opportunities we found out his profession is on the preferred occupation list; we applied through an agency and because of my qualifications and the age of our boys we have been accepted (I should point out we haven't applied officially yet it is through an intermediate agency who do all the legal bits for you!)

The situation is this:

1. If I get accepted to do my doctorate next year we wouldn't go until I had finished that anyway because my qualifications aren't recognised in Canada so my 10 years experience in a job I love would be wasted and I would have to requalify out there but with my doctorate I would be a psychologist and able to work out there
2. We know a lot of people in Canada and our heads tell us (DH & I) that we would be giving our boys better opportunities and a healthier life in Canada
3. My DH is an only child & his parents have very little family-we are both worried about leaving them as although they are perfectly healthy now as they get older they might/will need our support
4. We would most likely live in Alberta-how have any ex pats living out there coped with the winters?
5. Is it "selfish" to my DSs & DH to not want to go to what could well be a better life because I don't want to leave my friends and family who I am very close to (it is all 'I' which is what makes me think it's selfish) and if we don't go will we always wonder "what might have been" or is it selfish to go and leave DH's parents without their GC and alone when they might need us as they get older? My DSs are very close to their GPs on both sides and I feel removing them from the unique relationship children have with their GPs is the wrong thing to do....

GRRRRRR!!!!! It is SO hard

Sorry this is so rambly but am all over the place with this-we certainly don't need to make the decision now but am weighing everthing up and if I don't get accepted onto doctorate we would be looking to apply in the new year as my DH already has some possible job opportunities.

Hope that all makes sense-I s'pose in a nutshell (Thank the Lord I hear you cry!) I am asking you wwyd generally and for those that have emigrated how was it?

Thanks for ploughing through the essay

I moved to Australia 12 years ago from the UK. Initially DH went for his sabbatical but we enjoyed the lifestyle and climate and so he went for a job and got it.

We now live in Brisbane. DH has a great job (reaching a position that would have been much harder in the UK in terms of the population). We left when DS was 2 and DD was 6 months. Both children have done very well here in terms of school and sports. DS is in his school team for basketball, soccer and is a surf life saver. DD is a swimmer and keen water polo player. I do not think they would have had the sporting opportunities in Sheffield where we were from.

Sure we miss family. But we go back regularly (curtesy of the excellent job DH has) and family visit. I found it difficult at the beginning but made a lot of new friends. I found many in similar situations; family overseas. So we made good friendships.

Sure, Australia is different from Canada, esp in terms of the weather (fgs, it is the depths of winter here atm with 23 degree temp ) but if it gives you opportunities then you have to weigh the pros and cons and decide what you want to do.

Not saying it is easy but when I go back to the UK, I still think my family has done very well in Australia in terms of their well being.

We moved to Canada 5 yrs ago but we were running away... came back after 4 months of buying a lovely home there but it was not for us - even in lovely Vancouver. Write a list; pro's and cons and feel with your heart.