I have a housekeeper

[Backtothey2k]

Didn’t have time to do this before , but as I have some time thought I would do a AMA about my housekeeper.

Sorry - cross post! That's certainly a strange one.
@Backtothey2k - about how much goes missing per month, a few forks and spoons? Carving knives and ladles?

It's a shame that you have to constantly ask others in your house to do stuff. Why isn't your partner doing housework? How old are the children?

Do you cover things like holiday/sick pay and a pension?

If your housekeeper needs a holiday do you struggle without her?

When your kids leave home do you think you will still need her services?

Yes, I agree, it is a shame. Old enough to do it themselves. Partner helps when he can. But it’s never ending tasks. I don’t know how anyone ever gets on top of it.

What age were the children when you made the switch from a nanny and cleaner to a housekeeper?

I think we're on top of it because everyone sees it as their job, they're part of the household. My DH is a migrant from a very traditional society, but learned quickly about housework, shopping and cooking! My DC as well. I think if the children see both parents doing it, no arguments or resentment, then they contribute as well. It's just part of being a family.

Thank you for the response ♥️I think we are fundamentally different human beings. I’m genuinely happy for you that your family works so well together.
I grew up seeing it as a chore, so my kids have never seen me be enthusiastically on top of any household task. I do what I can scrape by doing. I don’t like making them do it because I hate it myself. Because no matter how much of it I do, there is always more the next day. There is never a day when I wake up with no housework to do and I find that monumentally depressing. If I could pay someone to do it then I would.

Sorry if I’ve derailed the tread!!
OP I wanna know where you go at the weekends!

I'm sorry that you find it monumentally depressing, that must be awful.
I grew up with many siblings, our mum was always stressed and it was us girls who had to do the chores and I resented it.
When I met DH we talked about what family life would be, and what it wouldn't. He'd never done any housework, but he just got on with it. From when our DS was about 5, he used to help his Dad change the sheets and put clean bedding on. When he was a teenager that became his job every week! You just all have to see what needs to be done - and do it. We've never been able to afford help, that's life.
Please try to get your family on board, you shouldn't feel so depressed about it. 💐

💜

I no longer have time to reply to everyone individually, but just to clear a few things up regarding the wages. some cleaners charge up to £20 an hour, so I think the pay is very reasonable for a trustworthy valued member of staff.
The comments about stealing cutlery are just ridiculous, and calling someone a criminal when you've never even met them is completely crazy.
Also, some people seem a bit confused about what an AMA is it’s meant to be about the specific topic I posted, not a Q&A about my entire life.
Thanks so much to the lovely people who were just genuinely interested, I hope you got the answers you were looking for.

No, the cutlery question is genuine. Cutlery goes missing regularly? That's crazy. The checking of the housekeeper's pockets was a joke.
You started an AMA, you can't decide what questions get asked. Don't answer is your default? Fine.
If you're too busy to answer individually, get the housekeeper to do it.

🤣🤣🤣

If a man owned a business and felt he needed to employ someone so that the business could grow and he could focus on tasks more relevant to his skill set, would he be questioned about why he couldn’t just do these tasks himself? Would picking up lunch at Pret and a coffee at Costa be mocked because, after all, surely he’s capable of making these himself and his children should see him doing so? Or is it just women delegating domestic chores that’s so deserving of sarcasm and ridicule?

Sink snobbery ! We have 4...I am.about to fit a fifth ! ( very difficult to say with a mouthful of cornflakes!)

Do you have a sink specifically for cornflakes? That's fancy.

Nooo...not yet 🤣

Cutlery goes missing regularly in my home as well and it’s just DD and me most of the time. No idea where it goes.

How very odd. Get a metal detector.

😂

I think there might be a touch sarcasm in the question

My thoughts exactly. I like to choose my own cutlery and my own pillows.

Do you have one of those tiny dogs with a bow on its head and, if so, does it like to travel in your handbag?

I'm sort of surprised this is worthy of an AMA, but equally surprised by the amount of judgment on this thread. We have a housekeeper too - half time now that the DCs aren't at home full time - and I never thought about needing to justify it any further than there are things we prefer to outsource so we do.

Off to count the sinks...

No need to justify it! Just count your cutlery 😉