I married an illegal immigrant - AMA

[Annie834]

I married a man who entered the UK as an illegal immigrant. After 5 years of relationship and two years of living together, we applied for his visa on grounds that he is my ‘durable life partner’ (this was while EU law was still applicable in the UK, I’m a EU citizen with settlement status). We went via an immigration lawyer and were upfront about the fact that he entered the UK illegally (not that this could have been concealed anyway). The application was successful and he was granted pre-settled status. We then got married a couple of years later and had a child.

I will answer any questions, but might not engage in wider discussions about illegal immigration, there are enough threads about that topic and this is an AMA.

You know OPs husband isn’t on the thread you? What are you getting out of telling her off? I am finding it really weird tbh that you take such comfort in this

I left the UK after 25 years because I got sick of the anti-Irish prejudice. From a minority, obviously, but you never knew when and where it would rear its ugly head, got worse around and after Brexit, and I didn't want my child growing up with that.

I'm white. I don't know what will happen when that kind of anti-Irish person, who is usually also racist, starts encountering non-white Irish people.

I assume they will realise that their IRA gambits will land differently, but who knows? They may have to come up a whole different range of slights.

Taxi drivers and people called Yusef, Mohammed, Ion, and Gezim?

What’s a NPC and why am I silly?
🤔

OP started a thread to engage with people, and I’m sure she was fully aware that there would be some very strong feelings around this issue and some robust discussion. To her credit, she has responded to some quite challenging questions. You, OTOH, seem to just need to cheerlead for crime.

But what’s the point? I don’t understand people who just say things like CRIME. It’s so simplistic- it’s even more so to allege those who challenge you on it are supporting crime. Don’t you see how daft that sounds? “You’re not telling her off like a naughty school girl so you CHEERLEAD CRIME.”

At what point did he actually change his name, or is he still pretending to be someone else? Are you even sure he is who he claims to be? As everything started to unravel, I honestly don’t understand how you didn’t report him to immigration or walk away.

If he was using someone else’s identity, that would have affected everything his job, paperwork, the lot. How do you admit to using a false identity and not get dismissed or reported? And how do you even begin to undo that and get your own National Insurance number? If I told HR I suddenly had a new NI number, I’d fully expect to be sacked. It would mean I’d lied through my application and interview I wouldn’t be who I said I was. And if he tried to move on to another job, how would he even get a reference? It just doesn’t add up. Has he somehow got around all of this, or was he just working for dodgy companies, being paid under the table and below minimum wage?

What really baffles me, though, is why you’d choose to pursue a relationship with someone like this in the first place. He’s clearly comfortable lying and avoiding authorities, he could have been anyone on the run. It all sounds incredibly risky. Add to that the fact he had no real skills and was working cash-in-hand, dodging tax… I just can’t understand what made you think, “Yes, I want to date this man.”

And then to move him into your mortgage-free flat and marry him… it’s honestly hard to get your head around. How do you trust someone like that?

What's the point in any of this? You supporting criminality is just as valid as me opposing it; we each have strong views based on opinion and experience.

Did you ever read A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian by Marina Lewicka (2007)? It's about exactly that experience and a fun read.
Decolonisers are people who have the view, all the rage until recently, that Brits should be ashamed of themselves because of the way white people benefitted shamelessly from the exploitation of black people. White people should be making financial recompense to black people in this day to make up for it.
My personal view is that that people of this persuasion have little interest in a balance historical perspective, such as Britain's role in ending slavery, or the fact that the average Brit was an agricultural worker who was mostly interested in staying alive and had no connection with slavery.
The view seems to have been so widespread while lacking in perspective, that I wondered whether some politically hostile power was spreading it to encourage social disharmony.

With all due respect this is just a bit naive. Shadow working is common even if it’s unpalatable to those of us used to playing by the rules.
OP has already responded to explain when he stopped using the relatives details and the sequencing of it

It was much less complicated than that…I don’t think he regularly needed to pretend to be someone else before he met me. His employer was on board with it, so he didn’t need to lie to them. He didn’t need to show his right to live in the UK to open a bank account. He rented from a dodgy landlord who purposely rented to illegal immigrants so that he could treat them badly. He obviously didn’t have an NI nor did he need one because his employer knowingly used someone else’s details incl NI number.

He got his status after 5 years with me and from that moment on, he has registered for his own NI number and had told his employer that there is no longer a need to use wrong details (they obviously were pleased, less risk for them).

I probably wouldn’t have started to date him if I had known that he had no legal status when I met him, but once I found out about this, I had discovered many other things about him that I liked.

It disadvantages him to pay illegal staff?
How does paying people cash in hand without declaring their existence going to increase his income tax? He's dodging his NICs etc so I don't think you should be thinking of him being disadvantaged. He's breaking the law surely? Does he pay these black market staff NMW?

Sorry if I sound judgemental but he sounds like he's still involved in the black labour market to an extent which is the opposite of what he should be doing having struggled so hard to go 'legit'.

Ah sorry, I was just being offhand. NPCs are the characters generated by the computer in video games, who exist only to further the objectives of the makers and who can’t deviate from the set script.

Loads of online people are still like that about the unique terribleness of Britain. You don’t need a conspiracy around Russian bots to explain their behaviour; it was fashionable a few years ago, is all.

Is that true though? I don’t know that OP has stated her husband has made a big effort to go legit. It’s not uncommon for people who work in construction to be on the margins . It’s more unusual to To be totally legit, no matter what their nationality

Glad your so happy to be upfront about it all OP. No wonder this country is up shit creek without a paddle. It's not the 'boats' that's the problem, it's people like the OP and the 'dodgy employers' that are compounding illegal immigration by being enablers.

Does he work and did he back then when you married him?

The construction industry uses the CIS scheme, this is a bit different in terms of employer’s responsibilites (Google can tell more). If he makes £1,000 on a job and pays someone £300 then he only pays income tax on £700. If this person doesn’t officially exist and gets cash in hand, he pays income tax on £1,000.

I think he’s very generous with fees due to his own experience of being exploited. He’d never offer NMW, he pays much more than that.

Maybe you're right. I guess I could be being naive about the construction business. I used to do a lot of work for the training board but the employers who engaged with that were obviously Legit else they wouldn't want to get involved in anything government adjacent.

Yes

Can you explain please how I’ve enabled him? He was set up before he met me, he didn’t need me to cross a border, rent accommodation or work illegally, he did this all by himself without my help.

I've never been married so have no idea but don't people have to prove ID to get married and I am pretty sure have to show right to work and right to live in the UK for accommodation and jobs?

This has to be a joke -UK welcomes illegal immigrants to a ridiculous level not matched anywhere else.

Because your relationship has allowed him to obtain status to stay in the UK. There should be no route to settled status in the UK if a person enters the country illegally.

You haven’t enabled him OP- it just makes some posters feel good to think it’s your fault illegal working/ renting etc exists

As OP said, they met the requirements of the law at the time. If you’re so into following the law you can’t decide to disregard it when ig works in a way you don’t like