I married an illegal immigrant - AMA

[Annie834]

I married a man who entered the UK as an illegal immigrant. After 5 years of relationship and two years of living together, we applied for his visa on grounds that he is my ‘durable life partner’ (this was while EU law was still applicable in the UK, I’m a EU citizen with settlement status). We went via an immigration lawyer and were upfront about the fact that he entered the UK illegally (not that this could have been concealed anyway). The application was successful and he was granted pre-settled status. We then got married a couple of years later and had a child.

I will answer any questions, but might not engage in wider discussions about illegal immigration, there are enough threads about that topic and this is an AMA.

That’s true, I’m an immigrant here myself albeit legally because I’m from an EU country and came before Brexit. Whether or not the UK is welcoming of immigrants wasn’t at the forefront of my mind, I made this decision based on the work and lifestyle I pursued.

Did the construction company that hired him under someone else's name know that he wasn't the person he was using documentation for?

Do you think that his origin country really is as bad as he says, and were/are there any legitimate routes to living in the UK he could have pursued?

Between you, are you net contributers or taking more out than you put in?

That’s a tricky one…I don’t think open borders can work and I also think that laws need to be respected. But I was born in a rich country with plenty of opportunities and still I emigrated, I feel like a hypocrite if I told other people that they shouldn’t.

Albania

I think we feel the same.

I feel like in your situ it’s hard to remove loving you from loving the country / your life together. I think that’s ok but I can see how people have questioned this. Did you ever feel superior or like you held all the cards in the relationship?

Yes, they knew.

I don’t know, I’ve just revealed that his home country is Albania in my previous post. It’s a lovely country for holidays, but the economy is not good. Whether there are really no opportunities or whether it’s something in people’s minds, I don’t know. But young people do grow up there trying to leave, everyone wants to work somewhere in Europe or ideally the UK.

I don’t think there were any legal routes, Albanians can’t usually claim asylum and skilled workers visas were out of reach for him (he was low skilled when he came and from a poor upbringing in a village with no money whatsoever that would have made it very difficult to pursue any sort of higher education).

He moved into my flat which I had bought as a cash buyer using money from an inheritance before I met him (so no mortgage for him to help with), but we are sharing any other bills equally.

Can you say why he thought the UK would be a good place to live? Was it because of benefits offered or because he'd have less chance of being kicked out? It wouldn't be my first choice if I was looking for a great economy.

Does he have family back home? Does he send any money home?

I did feel like I’m the one with more power initially, but I think it has evened out over the time. He now has a good job, earns similar money and we are making decisions (we just did a major renovation of my flat which he initiated) together.

How long have you been married for? Am I right in thinking it’s 5 years of marriage and they can leave you and keep citizenship?

He never thought about benefits and would be too proud to take any. The UK is the ‘go to’ destination for people in his country, it’s being seen as a rich and powerful nation. He was also motivated by having distant family here who immigrated a long time ago.

I have to say , as a legal second gen brown immigrant- my parents were highly skilled and only allowed to come when they proved their skills- I sometimes feel white immigrants- any kind- have all the privilege. My doctor dad was told to go back home so many times in the 70s, and of course I have been too ( less so since I moved to London). And now Reform is going to target immigrants, but only non-white ones. Every brown or black person is scapegoated as an illegal immigrant.

What are your thoughts on this?

Do you speak Albania at home, your language, English or a combination? Could your child get 3 passports? Albanian, British and your home country?

His parents are back home. He doesn’t regularly send money but pays for things like doctor visits when necessary.

He needs to be 6 years legally in the UK to apply for a British passport. He’s now here 5 years legally (the last 2 years before our marriage were legal already). During these past 5 years, no one ever asked for proof of our relationship though, he just shows his pre-settled status which doesn’t mention that it’s connected to a relationship so he might be ok already.

I’m not sure if this is allowed, but how did he physically arrive / get into the country? Was it on a holiday and then he overstayed?

This is a very interesting thread - thanks for sharing.

We speak English at home, our child is dual citizen UK and EU. We didn’t bother getting an Albanian passport for him because it’s not that useful.

He doesn’t like talking about it, I think it was quite an ordeal and it was on a lorry or boat. He never had a visitor/tourist visa, young Albanian men wouldn’t get one because too many are overstaying.

Oh it was so romantic on a beach..sorry couldn't resist.

My parents arrived here in the 80s via Heathrow and claimed political asylum upon landing. Their circumstances were very different as for their reasons being here, but I have so much respect for someone who moves here, because they have no choice, and have to start a new life from scratch.

Kudos to you both.

There are a LOT of Albanians here involved in drugs and organised crime. Are all his friends now equally law-abiding citizens like you say he is?

It probably cost him a lot of money to pay the smugglers as well. I saw an interesting report on C4 which featured interviews with Albanian men who had done just that. Same story. One was able to build his parents a home with the money he made on building sites.

Does he think the Uk is not as he expected, did he imagine it would be nicer better?
Does he miss his home country?