I still breastfeed my 5 year-old

[TandemFeeder]

I’ve had another baby too so am now a tandem feeder. Happy to answer any questions.

I was going to type this ! I really think you need to look long term OP ,it really could gross your child out when they are older. It is not a necessary/ usual way of comforting a 5 year old .

Assuming it’s for the “parents benefit” is just not true. I’m a single mum with a just turned 3 year old who still breastfeeds. Certainly wasn’t the plan but I have really struggled to stop due to his reaction and was not prepared or supported with what weaning would be like. I tried when he just turned 1 but I couldn’t cope with the endless screaming it caused. Tried again at just turned 2, still, the same, worse in fact.

I appreciate weaning can be difficult for all children, and some might say to “get on with it” but I don’t have a partner to pass him too when he’s crying for the boob. It’s just me. Both times I’ve tried in the past to stop he would scream for literally hours, wouldn’t fall back to sleep and we were both emotional wrecks. Then on top of that I had to go to work the following morning.

Please don’t paint a picture you clearly know nothing about. We are all trying our best and the judgement is so wrong.

Way to make weird generalisations. I fed my youngest until 5. The only people who knew were him, his father and medical team. It definitely wasn’t for attention.

I think that has a lot to do with our society thinking breastfeeding is a bit weird and sexualised though.

You physically can’t bf a child that doesn’t want it. Bf is always child-led.

@TandemFeeder also.. if your son asked to be fed when you are in a public place for comfort (if he hurt himself etc.), would you oblige?

If yes, would you draw a line as to where? (e.g. would you do it in the school playground?)

Exactly this.

I think my kids shouldn't run across the road to the ice cream van without looking, but you know, they want to, which means they need to. I can't make these decisions for them.

Of course your child will still want to breastfeed and you will have to wean them off yourself - not give them the choice to do so "naturally" or when they are comfortable.

It's like potty training - my almost two year old doesn't want to try, would rather stay in nappies forever if I let her, however that decision is for me to make and guide her.

I understand you think you are doing what is best for your child, however you do need to wean them, especially if it's for comfort - what if they will want to suckle on your breasts before bed for comfort past the age of 7?

I mean this kindly OP, but I hope you realise that you could be causing your children damage unintentionally x

Surely kids want to do uncountable numbers of things which we stop them from doing for their greater benefit?

It’s not really feeding is it? It’s just nipple sucking. Yuck! Is it for you op?

Hurrah! Thank you for finding some actual
info on this. Can’t help but see 99% of cultures stated are in an environment of limited food and resources.

What’s the great benefit when there are literally no evidenced downsides.

What’s the great benefit when there are literally no evidenced downsides.

Children would chow down on chocolate all day given half the chance, doesn’t make it right.

Just no.

Fed till 3.5 and 4.

they loose their latch around 6-7

i stopped due to feeling incredibly touched out but by then i remember first was going several days without and second only at bedtime.

Go you OP!! And well done for the brave there’s too. I managed till 3 and then couldn’t hack it any more. I hated all the backlash, it broke my heart, I made my choice after lots of research.

I would never judge another mother for her choices so the constant judgement you get for breastfeeding past 6 months, despite it being backed by science, is such a disappointment.

Natural weaning age for humans globally is around 7years. My son bf until 5th birthday , daughter bf until 6th birthday, I wanted to stop at 5th but she wasn't ready. After age about 18months bf was only at bedtime and waking up time. Both are absolutely fine and thriving.

There's a networking lady near me in Suffolk who constantly shouts about her doing this. Im not sure why she tells everyone.

Mr too OP. My just six year old still asks occasionally but I usually deflect/distract now and we’ve talk about how getting ‘big teeth’ will mean no more milk. My three year old still nurses most days at bedtime, about half the mornings and occasionally if upset/hurt/ill/tired

Also, the sexualisation of breastfeeding in the U.K. is very concerning. If you think it’s weird then you are likely sexualising it and YOU are the problem and need to address why you feel like breastfeeding older children is ‘wrong’ despite it being natural.

But in our society in 2025 there will be. If school friends found out. They would be teased mercilessly.
So that is the downside. And saying it should not be so will not stop it being so.
If the OP wants to take a chance with her children that others will not find out that is a risk she is taking. So a downside is very much there.

Was just coming on here to say that’s why they’re called milk teeth! I remember reading an article about a mother on a train in India who fed three children in a row, first her babe in arms, then a toddler and then a child of about 4. Fair play to her. I bf my two to 6 months and just under 2 years old per WHO guidelines at the time. My second was 11 months old and bf still and she was the only one of my extended family not to get a vomiting bug one Christmas!

I would definitely be recorded on a CPOMS system. I have direct knowledge of knowing that it has been at least once in more recent years.

like many other things, stuff is entering the system. Often they are of no further concern, sometimes they help for a bigger picture of the situation. In the case I am referencing it was something that was mentioned by the year 1 child. It was recorded. It ended up being just one thing amongst others - it was a small part of a jigsaw that, with other factors, led to further concerns.

It’s important to note that these things CAN be recorded if a child discloses. Our safeguarding systems have an awful lot of categories - not just ‘of concern.’

I was addressing the implication from some posters that it’s something that is done for the mum’s satisfaction. It’s obviously something that is driven by the child.

But to your point- of course we stop kids doing bad things but consuming one of the healthiest foods there is simply isn’t one of them.