AMA - My Journey to Minimalism

[Verbena17]

Hi 😊
Ask me anything…. about how I went from cluttered house, mind and life to how I started and continued my minimalism journey.

I don’t know if this is something that interests people but if it is, ask away!

How do you get rid of stuff responsibly? That's my biggest stumbling block and doesn't really get talked about in any of the Insta "minimalism" posts. They just say "Don't need it? Chuck it!"

But I end up bogged down in different categories of "stuff" thinking - could anyone use this? Can it really be recycled? Where should I take it? Etc. I realise these items already exist, i can't do anything about it, and I need to make better decisions in the future, but hate to think of sending stuff to landfill etc.

@ThewaytoAmarula if you have decided that something no longer works for you, whether it doesn't fit or doesn't work or is beyond repair, out grown etc it needs to leave your house just moving it around and dusting it is not achieving anything

somethings just have to go to landfill, there are more categories to recycle stuff at local recycling cente than your front door recycling; many places have space for broken small appliances, paint, oil, tyres, white goods, cushions and furniture, clothes not good enough for resale ie stained or with holes,

all stuff will end up in landfill or recycling at some point.Unfortunately we have to acept that some stuff can''t be donated,repaired or recycled so we need to be realistic just keeping something in your understair cupboard because you don't know where to recycle is just delaying it's landfill destination by someone else.

There is no point in buying more nonrecycleable storage boxes to hold stuff we don't use and won't use organising comes after decluttering not before

The best thing is to get rid of the excess, de clutter be kind to yourself over past mistakes and then be more intentional with what comes into your home in the future, getting into cycles of decluttering accummulating then decluttering again is kind of pointless.
obviously with somethings it is necessary children outgrow clothes, shoes, toys and books, things wear out they get broken

I have to say that much of what I'm reading here is standard stuff now for many people except they don't call it a name.

Thank you @cottagecheeseisnotcheese , what you say all makes perfect sense and I know that I know it all deep down! I wonder how many others have this sort of environmental angst about decluttering. The key thing for me is being more intentional, as you say, about what I buy in future - and I'm getting better at that.

PS I agree cottage cheese is not cheese :)

And of course you can say that ….although never having seen my home or know how I live my life, how could you possibly know that?

That’s a good point but I think the majority of people do not live in this way in all aspects of their life.

I think modern society has given the name of minimalism to what was once just the normal way of living - before mass marketing came in and consumerism took over the majority of peoples lives.

I mean, you’ve given a fair amount of information on this thread though, given that you’re literally talking about your ‘experience of minimalism’. I’m probably a minimalist by your definition.

Just because you’ve Maria Kondo’d your life, it doesn’t mean you’re a minimalist. Rejecting mass consumerism doesn’t mean you’re a minimalist. To be a minimalist you’d probably have enough material possessions to fill a standard sized suitcase, a small house, either no car or a small car, and a zero waste policy. Can you honestly say this is you?

You can totally be responsible when getting rid of stuff.
I sold or gave away lots of children’s clothes and toys to our local Facebook site.

Anything more expensive we sold on eBay.
I gave stuff to relative’s children, who are younger than mine so that was helpful.

Books i took to charity shops or book bins. Clothes not good enough for charity shops or charity bags, i took to the material banks.
Everything else that could be recycled we recycled in our bin at home and so I can’t really think of much that went into our normal household waste bin at all.

I think to begin with i got hung up on stuff we didn’t want but that was worth something but then I thought, well if we don’t want it I’d rather give it away than try selling it and nobody buying it.

You’ve described one version of minimalism.

Chase Bank describe Minimalism as…
’A minimalist lifestyle is intentionally living with fewer possessions — focusing only on the ones you need. Living with less may be the right choice if you're feeling overwhelmed with clutter, if you're looking for fewer distractions, or if you're looking to cut back on spending.’

This is from The Minimalists…
‘Minimalism is a tool that can assist you in finding freedom. Freedom from fear. Freedom from worry. Freedom from overwhelm. Freedom from guilt. Freedom from depression. Freedom from the trappings of the consumer culture we’ve built our lives around. Real freedom.
That doesn’t mean there’s anything inherently wrong with owning material possessions. Today’s problem seems to be the meaning we assign to stuff: we assign too much meaning to things, often forsaking our health, our relationships, our passions, our personal growth, and our desire to contribute beyond ourselves.
Want to own a car or a house? Great, have at it! Want to raise a family and have a career? If these things are important to you, that’s wonderful. Minimalism simply allows you to make these decisions more deliberately.
There are plenty of successful minimalists who lead appreciably different lives. Our friend Leo Babauta has a wife and six children. Joshua Becker has a career he enjoys, a family he loves, and a house in suburbia. Conversely, Colin Wright owns 51 things and travels all over the world. And Tammy Strobel lives in a tiny home and is completely car-free.
Even though each of these people are different, they all share two things in common: they are minimalists, and minimalism has allowed them to pursue purpose-driven lives.’

Sorry but that’s just semantics, and good branding. Not actual minimalism. If it makes you feel better though then great!

Our Military life was just one of the things that helped us on the road to being more mindful of how much we keep and buy.
You can choose a point in time of where you want to be and how you want that to make you feel and then in the years that follow, you can go through stuff again and choose more things to declutter/organise/live without. You could say for example, I want to streamline how we deal with paperwork in our house and I am going to achieve this by January. Then come January, you can think well, I want to get rid of anything I don’t love in our home and I want to get this done by March, or whatever.

We did keep more things when we were younger in case we needed them in the future and that was a lot of the stuff I got rid of over the past 5-10 years. And when finances are tight, it might not be the right moment to be throwing lots of stiff out that you reasonably may need.
As we were going along, we always asked ourselves, ‘if we needed this item in the future, would we be able to afford to buy it again?’ That was quite useful for some of the more expensive things like furniture.

You can of course have your own opinion of what ‘minimalism’ is and if my version isn’t your version, if it makes you feel better then great!

ByHardyRubyEagle - I think you're the one getting hung up on the semantics, trying to pin Verbena down to a standard of minimalism that you've set. Why are some people always so literal about things? Where does it say you can only have possessions to fill a small suitcase or a small car?

And what's with the sneery comments such as "Just because you’ve Maria Kondo’d your life...", and "If it makes you feel better though then great!". What is it with people like you? Most have taken the thread for what it is and contributed their experiences and then along you come to try and take people down. What do you get out of that? Why spoil the thread with your pedantry? Pathetic. And the other one above saying something about it is standard stuff and people didn't used to give it a name or whatever - just unnecessary.

Thanks @KarlaKK 😊

I didn’t mean my thread to sound smug or that I have all the answers to minimalism because it’s quite clear I don’t! 😂
And the thread title does say ‘my journey to minimalism’. I’ve nowhere near finished - it will take me years more to get my home and life to where I want it, as our family evolves and children leave home etc

Perhaps my thread title should have said ‘AMA about my hopes of becoming a minimalist’.

Verbena - your post title is fine. Ignore the people that will nitpick about anything. They must be extremely hard work in real life. A number of people have come on here saying they'd like to declutter and asked for your advice on how to start. Your thread has been very helpful so disregard those that will always find something to criticise and trip you up about. There is always one or two like that.

Your title and posts are fine, @Verbena17 , and I think the discussion has been very interesting and thought provoking, as well as practical.
It's helped me to make some decisions about clearing out, and sentimental items.
As we have seen on here, all too often people come on threads to have a go at others.
No need.

Thanks both 😊

Look, I’ve lived on a very low income for years, and by definition I’m a fecking minimalist. I don’t drive, have a small house, don’t have a lot of furniture because we can’t afford it, don’t go on holiday for the same reasons. I cut my own hair once a year, it’s long straight simple hair to cut so it’s easy enough. I own a very small amount of clothes and wear them until they have holes in. The only possessions I’m not ‘minimalist’ with are my books, which I don’t think you can have too many of, and I don’t even have that many. Being poor forces you to go without, so I’m not interested in brands because they’re not an option. If OP has gone from consumerist with a cluttered home, to a more streamlined lifestyle and going without more often then great, but in my opinion that is not minimalism. The reading material OP has referred to, again in my opinion, is clever branding for people who are already living a consumerist lifestyle. In itself, the OP has consumed the whole ‘minimalist’ brand. It’s also a public forum and I can give my opinion!

I don’t think it was your opinion but more the sort of sharpish way you wrote it.
That being said, I understand where you’re coming from and yes, having no choice but to be frugal does make you more likely to be minimalist.

I haven’t consumed the whole minimalist brand at all - just happened to have watched a few people….but that was mostly after I chose to streamline my life. As I explained, I was already living in a mindful way for years with all of our house moves.

You're like a dog with a bone.

Anyway, I did a quick search and you mention £10 gardening clogs you bought the other day and that you wear Dr Ms and have (get this) two pairs - one in black and the other in brown. Hardly a fucking minimalist by my definition and it disputes what you say about not being interested in brands. Saying Verbena isn't a minimalist just because you say so means nothing.

And how can you be a minimalist if you don't include books? Such tripe. You're making it up as you go along. Own it - you were being plain nasty.

Verbena, you're being too nice. I wouldn't give her the time of day, full of rubbish she is going by her last post. Then she had the gall to say you were focusing on the semantics . Thanks to LochKatrine for speaking up too.

I never said I was a minimalist! Only by the OP’s definition. Does it help you to know that I’ve had my docs for over 15 years, and at the time they were a big lifetime investment…it saved me buying shit shoes that I’d have to replace every year, and also saved my feet. A dog with a bone? You’re the one trawling through my old posts.

Then you say "In itself, the OP has consumed the whole ‘minimalist’ brand." So what if she has? What's it to you? So patronising. Why can't you just take the thread for what it is - someone that has benefited from decluttering, being more minimalistic, more mindful. Why the constant trying to trip her up on semantics - especially when what you've said is full of holes (that you're a minimalist but you're not when it comes to books - either you are or you aren't a minimalist, same as you can't be a bit pregnant - and on other threads talking about two pairs of Dr Ms - hardly a minimalist). But of course your definition is the only one so that's all fine then.

You said in one of your posts: "and by definition I’m a fecking minimalist"

Just pathetic. Give it a rest.