I'm just an average gypsy AMA

[GypsyAMA]

I've noticed a lot of hatred towards gypsies on here so I thought I'd answer any questions anyone may have that could help you to understand my culture more. You might still disagree with many aspects, but at least you'll be coming from facts and not stereotypes.

OP your answers are fine (plus there's no way you could possibly answer all the questions there's so many). You might need to start a new thread when this one is filled after page 40 as this is such a fascinating/busy topic.

I'm from the north of Ireland and live half a mile from a gypsy camp (that's an Irish traveller group as opposed to yours). I was terrified as a kid growing up as the gypsy kids would chase us when we went to the playing fields...I will say though they never hit us or anything, and looking back I think it was more they got a kick out of scaring us. My brother has since become close to one of them.

I can only speak about the travelling community as opposed to yours, but I do see some similarities in your answers. Very conservative, and many are very religious. And the homes are incredibly clean. What I love most is their honesty. What you see is what you get. It's why I'm a huge fan of Tyson Fury. He's as honest as the day is long. Your answers are coming across that way too.

After reading this thread I am not surprised that people get confused between gypsies and irish travellers, yes their ethnicities are completely different, but even taking the nomadic aspect out of it, the general lifestyle and attitudes to education, vaccinations/medicine, family, socialising, dress sense, the different roles of women and men in and out of the home, and even traditional food seem to be almost identical. Are there any major differences aside from ethnicity op?

@conversekid
Deborah Meadon graduated in Buisness Studies from Brighton Technical College. She may not have taken exams at the end of secondary school but she was most definitely educated.

Have you looked at the statistics relating to the deprivation faced by the GRT community in the UK.
Having a basic education shouldn't be a lifestyle choice it's essential especially for women.

The only way they could access HE would be to do an access course later on as they would have no A levels to enter HE at 18.

I don't think that anyone is saying that everyone should go to uni and get a degree. What it keeps coming back to is the removal of the choice that education gives. What about the gypsy child who wants to design dresses ...be a translator...an airline pilot...a chemist. Yes the family business may be successful but removing children from school at age 12 and sending them to work with their dad or leaving them at home with mum is still limiting choice and controlling their lives in ways that should be unnacceptable. Imagine the furor if schools started saying "oh your Mum is a dinner lady so you only need to be taught to wash up and cater in bulk....no need for languages for you my girl and only basic literacy and numeracy" "Now your Mum and dad are both doctors so extra sciences for you" and yes I am aware that that example is reductio ad absurdam. yes there are, and always will be, the people who make it against the odds but I don't think that anybody will deny that they are the outliers.

Deborah Meaden then sold the family business which is where she got her money from

Education
Firstly, I really resent all of the people calling me stupid and stuff simply because I didn't go to school. But a person who had finished school, done poorly and wasn't very intelligent would somehow be more able to make decisions than me? In all honesty this view says a lot more about you than it does about me and it's a shame that in all your years of schooling you didn't learn how to be a decent person. My inability to perform a science experiment has funnily enough never held me back yet.
I've answered a lot of education questions and I really don't know what else to say, there are plenty of gypsies who get an education and some have even posted/been mentioned on this thread.

@GypsyAMA
No one is calling you or gypsies stupid, literally no one. We are asking why you would actively choose not to gain knowledge / information on a variety of subjects?
I am really glad that gypsies are letting their DC carry on in education and hopefully letting them furrow their own path. I am hoping that this is the norm and that the girls get the opportunity to have careers in whichever sector they like and not just indoctrinated to be a home maker.

The person who finished school, who wasn't very intelligent, but just scraped a Maths & English GCSE would have literally thousands more job opportunities opened up to them versus someone who didn't.

I have to admit that the most shocking detail on this thread, is the active withdrawal of gypsy children from education.

Education is power, education is knowledge, education is freedom, education gives you confidence and self esteem, education promotes personal growth and development, education leads to an improved quality of life. Why withhold something so precious from your children?

I have really enjoyed this thread OP thank you so much. I went to primary school with travellers (rather than gypsies as you've described the difference) and I have always disliked the stereotypes. As a group (from the same family community) they were very family orientated and respectful.

I really like how you've handled some of the trickier and more challenging responses also. Very interesting to read.

I agree. I mean, I was aware of it, but the OP’s apparent inability to understand why this is regarded as so appalling reads very strangely on a thread she says she intended to demystify her culture to people who ‘hate’ because of myths and stereotypes, when she’s robustly defending limiting her children’s lives on the most spurious of grounds. And ‘tradition’.

Why is 'grabbing' seen as okay, and not sexual assault?

It's either out of valuing education in an of itself, because being educated leads to a richer life and allows you to understand and access the world in a different way, or because it leads to better career opportunities. My career is not directly related to my degree but I use the analytical and writing skills I learned from it every day.

What happens to girls who love school, love being educated, hate the idea of being a SAHM, and dream of a career in your community? And do you ever think about all the things Romany children could achieve if they were allowed to stay in school and encouraged to have careers?

If you finish school, you can still become a SAHM afterwards if you want, but if you have no GCSEs it's quite hard to get a career. I can't help thinking that there must be so many women at home cleaning the house when they could be achieving so many things in science, arts, languages etc.

Brilliant post.

@GypsyAMA
Firstly, I really resent all of the people calling me stupid and stuff simply because I didn't go to school

Unless I've missed a post I literally can't see that anyone has said or suggested that.

People are questioning why you wouldn't allow your children to go to secondary school though. It is 'ask me anything' and I'm sure you can understand why people don't understand why you would do that to your kids. I honestly can't understand the reasoning especially when it comes to any daughters.

Thanks for this thread OP. You've had a lot more patience with some posters than I would have.

There is a site near me that has had gypsies on it since before I was born and they've always been perfectly nice, if a little distant from the community.

Also, slight rant of my own here but I've read a few times here about 'gypsy men working in scrap metal' and see similar posts on my local fb page warning people that he's coming around and I don't really understand the issue.
Our local scrap man is from the gypsy site - he checks if something looks like it may not have been left out for him, he says thank you, he saves me the bother of taking something away. Literally provides a service and earns his living that way - same as the person who delivers parcels or mows the local field!

Anyway, my questions are sort of follow on ones from your answers.

You said the men would use fighting as conflict resolution. What if it was conflict between women?

Would a woman be financially supported by her family until she's married? What if that isn't until she's 30?
What happens if you don't ever get married?

Were you a travelling gypsy (not a traveller but not sure how else to word the question) before you settled where you are now? If so, what made you choose to settle?

Thank you!

With parenthood being so important to your culture, how is infertility viewed? Are the couples supported by the community or is it hush hush and only spoken about in close families?

I ask because being child free by choice doesn't seem to be a common thing in your culture so a young married couple without kids would be talked about. Correct me if I'm wrong!

And thank you for this thread, I've learnt a lot!

Pipsquiggle · Today 10:39
"Education
Firstly, I really resent all of the people calling me stupid and stuff simply because I didn't go to school. But a person who had finished school, done poorly and wasn't very intelligent would somehow be more able to make decisions than me? In all honesty this view says a lot more about you than it does about me and it's a shame that in all your years of schooling you didn't learn how to be a decent person. My inability to perform a science experiment has funnily enough never held me back yet.
I've answered a lot of education questions and I really don't know what else to say, there are plenty of gypsies who get an education and some have even posted/been mentioned on this thread."

I don't think it excuses the OP's attitude to education for her children for you to say that "there are plenty of gypsies who get an education" I do think that a child who is removed from school at age 12 to go to work with dad or to stay home with mum is going to be less aware of what the options and possibilities are.

Sorry, it's always when describing women who look nice.

This

It’s my favourite language! Very few people
speak and know it , so it’s very useful I find.

I think it's very obvious why u wouldn't understand why outsiders value education. As I've said when I wrote my post and question that wasn't answered. Not upset at not answering Al all. u have had lots and I appreciate why u could miss mine. Limiting options and teaching children your way of life. Is Fundamental to keeping ur way of life. If u don't pull children out of school then they may go in different direction which would go against the principals of way of life. Its same way religious closed groups like Armish and others continue the way they are. Is that wrong in my opnion yes. But I do understand why it happens. I do genuinely feel for girls that doesn't want to be home maker and wife and all the gay people who I'm assuming cannot be true to themselves. But I think that in any group who has been taught what they r expected to do. And their are hundreds of different groups mainly religious that force this. This is the only place it happens.

*this isn't the only community to do it.

If there were decent facilities available across the country for nomadic living, would you want to? Is the move to sedentary living more because people like it more these days, or because they don’t see a choice?

I saw a group of travellers (not sure which ethnicity) using the electric vehicle charging points at a supermarket recently. They were perfectly polite and no litter etc. But it seemed a bit sad to me that people end up living in car parks and other unsuitable places. One dad had a toddler run after him and was clearly scared that his young child would potentially run in front of cars.

The middle class saviours on here tying themselves in knots to defend attitudes and behaviours which they absolutely would be condemning if it was white working class people doing it is both pathetic and amusing - as always!

Fair enough, she's not the best example 😂