I'm just an average gypsy AMA

[GypsyAMA]

I've noticed a lot of hatred towards gypsies on here so I thought I'd answer any questions anyone may have that could help you to understand my culture more. You might still disagree with many aspects, but at least you'll be coming from facts and not stereotypes.

@GypsyAMA do you know all about your own heritage, the beautiful history, and the stand out people from your own ethnicity? My adult kids don't know too much about theirs.

The Romani left Rajisthan a thousand years ago. Most moved through Egypt and it is believed that is where the term Gypsy came from. During their movements they became intertwined with flamingo in Spain.

I love music and know my rifts, one can link Jewish Slavic and other folk together with traditional Gypsy sounds.

Many settled in the UK from 1400’s onwards.

for every nasty poster, an ignoramus on here, and a bit of a hand hold to you.

Well known gypsies

David Essex, Micheal Caine, Elvis Presley, Charlie Chaplin, Bob Hoskins, Pablo Picasso,

The pearly Queens are also linked.

The sublime and most revered violinist Grappelli (who could not read music).

to name but a few.

Stand proud my love and live your life as you want to.

@GypsyAMA

is it quite hard for women who want to be child free by choice OP?

Great thread btw 👍 thank you

A couple of people have mentioned this and I didn't know about it. I might try and look into that as it's quite interesting

Why don't gypsies approve of breastfeeding?

Great Post OP. Expertly handled too!

I agree with you re secondary- it is horrendous for most. Me and DH are trying to find ways to avoid it through Education Otherwise.

Anyway, my questions

1. Do you keep pets? No-one asked this and I think it's always interesting to know.
2. If the father/husband dies in a young family, what happens to mother and children? Is there an expectation to remarry quickly or stay single?
3. If you could add one "gorger" experience into your life before marriage, now or later in life what would it be, if anything? Ex. A few flings before marriage, phd in Art History, neck tattoo? Everything in between of course 😆

Thanks.

Why don't gypsy men accompany their wives when they're in labour?

Why are you so concerned about girls learning about sex, when they're encouraged to wear skimpy and revealing clothes at parties?

In the U.S. a few years ago, there was a reality show called My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding.
It followed Gypsy families in Britain whose young daughters were marrying Gypsy young men and a dress designer who catered to them.
The dresses (to say the very least), were over the top “Cinderella” dresses — but the skirts were ENORMOUS — think the size of a Volkswagen, and elaborate to the extreme. They could barely fit into the carriage or car.
The brides most often were taken to their wedding in a Cinderella-type horse drawn carriage.
Is this the norm for Gypsy families or do you think this program was for a “clueless American public?” I don’t consider myself clueless, but I found it a fascinating look into a life completely unlike my own.
I will say the Gypsy people who took part — from the planning of the dresses to the end of their weddings seemed genuine and quite charming and not in the least “putting on or faking it.”

It was simply something I’d always wondered about relating to the gypsy community I live next to. I’ve not been able to ask anyone before that’s all.

I am appreciating the insight.

Why do you allow very young girls to wear sexualised clothing, make up, spray tans and jewellery?

@GypsyAMA That is exactly the sort of thing that should be publicised!

I always remember a radio interview with a community spokesperson years ago who was asked about littering. As they rightly pointed out, lots of people who live in houses litter but people don’t generalise & say that everyone who lives in houses lifters.

I live local to a travelling community. So here goes...
Who owns the land that they claim as their own and live on? I take it you are not expected to work? So how does your community earn a living? What does your husband do to bring home an income to support his family?

Tbf I have only read up to page 3. So forgive me for asking anything that has previously been asked, but I felt so compelled to give my opinion.
The experience I have is this... the general public are terrorised and fearful of the gypsy community. The general consensus is .. don't upset them, they will make your life hell. And they do! The women don't even bother dressing. They roll up in their 4x4's..park in a disabled spot...waltz into the local shop still dressed in their pj's.... threaten anyone who looks at them.... Don't get me started on the brutality and menace of the males...
So ...You may be different and I appreciate your honesty and exposure to this forum, but I speak from my experience and this is it. Plus, I went to school with a similar sect. You did not dare look at them.
There is a very low vibe energy amongst this type and they bring it on themselves I'm afraid. My town is an open and friendly community and would welcome anybody.. It is sad that the travellers/gypsies are so disrespectful and hostile. Very sad.

You have to understand that most people would welcome you with open arms. We are good, loving, kind humans. However, when horrible things happen, like theft (mostly), hostility, threat, menace, violence, damage to cars/property from members of the gypsy community... The public act in defense, protection and fear.
I wish you well my dear...

I wondered this too. A lot of outfits I've seen (eg at the Dorset Steam Fair) are very sexualised and revealing.

We have a girl from the gypsy community in the school in which I teach. Her mother won't send her to school when they're learning about sex, yet the child has her own smart phone and access to the internet. She'll learn about sex via gossip and who-knows-what online, wouldn't you rather she learnt about it factually from a teacher?

Do you teach girls about periods before they hit puberty? (That's all part of the sex-ed in school that they withdraw from).

Couldn't agree more. I love your questions too!

1. I don't personally have pets because we like to go on holiday as much as we can. But most of my family and friends have dogs who they adore.

2. To begin with, she will be provided for by family and friends for as long as she needs. Often they will work or set up a business. Lots of women (even with husbands) have businesses selling to other gypsies, usually baby clothes or home ware. She could remarry but most never do, especially if they have children.

3. I like this one and I might need to give it some more thought, but the first thing that springs to mind is going on school trips. My parents never allowed me to go

That's changed a lot in the last generation I'd say. Most do now.

It's Irish traveller girls who dress that way. I'd never have been allowed out in a bra top and mini skirt.

Op, there are two assumptions right here:
"I haven't made any assumptions about morals.

I'm sure everyone would agree that it's completely normal to you for your kids to spend their teenage years exploring these types of things. I haven't passed any judgement on that, just said that it's different to what we do."

I'm actually a non gypsy Catholic as well and my children go to Catholic school. I think it might be normal to some to have early sex and some not. So not normal to everyone except gypsies as you assumed. But It is possible to have your beliefs, teach your children them, and also let them have an education. You can send children to school that is aligned with your beliefs. The protection instinct shouldn't be at the extent of denying secondary education to your kids. You can't 100% give them the best in every subject at home by yourself. This is an easy way out of society.

On another note, I'm interested in gypsy mysticism. Could you let us know any common customs, superstitions, mystic beliefs that your community commonly has?

Hi I’m a gorga but been with my gypsy husband for 14 years. I’ve been accepted into his family with no issues. We meet in the middle and I live by some of his ways and he lives by some of mine. My eldest son done his GCSE’s last year in school and is now in college and this has been a major achievement to us :) I do however know how difficult it is to be gypsy as my children have been isolated at school by other parents who think they are bad and won’t invite them to parties etc incase they steal!! We are followed around supermarkets and made to feel criminal! I actually cried to my mother in law recently and said I don’t understand how people can be so nasty and I hate how people judge. I love being a part of the gypsy family and how loyal they all are! Just a shame peoples opinions are so tainted by the few bad x

I agree. I think it’s easy to use the “colonial mindset” argument to stop any criticism of other people’s customs, no matter how outdated or harmful those might be.

long time ago there was gypsy knocking my mother garden centre and said they will help my mother to trim bushes for fees. Which my mum agreed. They agreed to cut about 1m but They did shitty job and not cut even close to 1m. My mum refused to pay until they did it as they promised. Which is settled and they got their money. That night the gypsies come back and burned my mum garden centre. They burned it. We got cctv so we got the people who did it and police involved. Since then i dont ever ask help from gypsy. Are there a lot of in your community who does this kind of behaviour?, promised something and do shitty job and become very hostile and do revenge shit like this?

Thank for answering my last question. I've another one. Why are GRT households more than TWICE as likely to be single mothers than in the general UK population. Given the extremely low level of educational attainment and the fact that GRT women are more likely than any other group in the UK to have a job or be self employed it seems crazy that many in the GRT community still don't won't their children to be educated.

It doesn't add up to argue that children shouldn't go to secondary school because it's the 'culture' of the GRT community when that same culture is clearly ignored when it come to men being head of households and close family values.

OP, why do you think there are so many more single mothers in the GRT community than in the rest of the UK population. Can't you see that not allowing your kids to get even a basic education makes them incredibly vulnerable in the future, especially the girls.

BTW, I'm getting my stats from [[https://www.ethnicity-facts-figures.service.gov.uk/summaries/gypsy-roma-irish-traveller/ THIS 2022 UK.Gov report that is a summary of statistics about people from the Gypsy, Roma and Traveller ethnic groups living in England and Wales.

Are you Roma OP?

What a great thread OP. Thank you very much. I’ve only read your posts (you know, mumsnet).

There was a man who recently asked me if I wanted my drive cleaning (something I need to do myself). Told him that and then got talking about my self built old camper and did I want to sell it. How hard it was to find one and how I’d done it. I told him it’s the love of my life (and easy and cheap to find an old battered van and do it yourself) but he could do it too. Saw him drive off with his wife looking wistful.

At the time it really worried me because I felt a threat but actually now I see that he was just so awkward at talking to someone so different and it all makes sense.

Hope he makes his camper.

Thanks again for the thread

PS your grammar is impeccable

PPS get the vaccinations …research eradication of smallpox