I'm a Jewish Israeli, AMA

[israelilefty]

Jewish Israeli here. I grew up in a different country but have lived and worked most of my adult life here, living a fairly normal everyday life in northern Israel. When I'm not working, I enjoy cooking and hiking, I'm religiously observant (but also feminist), I'm on the left of the political spectrum, and have everyday contact with people from quite a range of different perspectives - Israeli society is incredibly diverse.

I guess I see us portrayed in a kind of monolithic way in the English-language media, so I'm taking a deep breath and posting here...

Feel free to AMA, just remember you're asking a real person, not a government or military spokesman :) I'll try to answer from my personal standpoint. as long as it's asked in good faith.

You're talking to the person who probably watches the fewest movies of anyone on the planet so I can't really comment (haven't heard it being discussed but that doesn't really say anything either since the news has been so busy in the past weeks). But it seems to get very good reviews so I hope to see it sometimes.

@Germanymunch

I didn't see your original question before it was deleted but I think it was basically to do with: how can Jews in Israel support Trump's plan for Gaza?Before I get to how people in Israel responded to Trump, I want to just make completely clear: Trump was voted in by Americans, not Israelis, and his foreign policy decisions speak primarily to his domestic supporters and to his own personal agenda - he's not part of the Israeli government. I think we should also realise that even moderate Israeli politicians would be cautious about openly speaking against his plans because he is, after all, president of a much stronger nation whose support is important to Israel.

It also goes without saying that I personally think Trump's proposal is illegal and outrageous. I also, frankly, feel angry and offended that he has rushed like a bull into a china shop at a critical point in the ceasefire/hostage deal, and that someone with the weight of the President of the USA can make an ill-considered announcement apparently without even seeking the advice or discussing it with advisors knowledgeable in foreign policy.

Trump's announcement has not been centre stage in Israeli media or social media because it was rapidly eclipsed by the hostage release and outrage over the emaciated condition of Eli Sharabi, Or Levy and Ohad ben Ami and the sheer psychological and physical cruelty to which they were subjected. However, where I did see newscasters discussing Trump's announcement, it was done with the understanding that this "plan" should be understood as a gambit in negotiations, not a serious proposal that's actually going to happen.

Why did many of the Israeli public, when polled, express some degree of support for Trump's plan? I think the biggest reason is the current lack of any other plan on the table which would provide a sense of security for Israeli citizens. It's important to understand that the current hostage releases have raked up a lot of trauma for most Israelis: it has brought us back to the trauma of Oct 7 which is still very much open, and also the extent of Hamas's sadism and abuse has raised ugly intergenerational trauma. And alongside the hostages, we see a show of strength and presence by Hamas, meaning that the overall goal of the war has failed. And no Israeli is willing to go back to the situation of October 6. With all this in mind, without any other realistic plan on the table, and with a promise of a "magic wand" that will make things better, it's not surprising that many Israelis have favourable opinions of Trump's plan.

I will add a comment, though: I don't feel like getting into deep discussions of Trump's plan as I assume it's not a serious plan, but rather an attempt to put pressure on regional partners. However, Trump has already succeeded in moving the boundaries of acceptable discourse. Beforehand, talking about transfer of Palestinians was basically confined to the hard right. In just one speech, Trump normalised that approach, which has an immense impact on public discourse. This is worrying.

Today in Israel we woke up to thunder and rain, as if G-d himself raged and wept with us. I left the supermarket balancing a box of strawberries on my hand - a small treat but my child is the same age as Ariel Bibas and we are all hugging our children closer today. "It's a difficult day," said a random women as I passed her. In the bakery, the radio was playing sad songs. Yet another message from psychologists came round on WhatsApp: "how to help your children cope with the news" - together with the fervent hope that he's too young, he won't hear about it, he won't see the sadness on the grownups' faces.

The return of Shiri, Ariel and Kfir Bibas and Oded Lipshitz in coffins is devastating. Not just because they are four more victims of this war, but because they symbolise the absolute evil of an enemy who sees nothing as an illegitimate target: not a 9-month old baby and not a peace activist in his 80s who was a committed socialist who had worked as a journalist reporting on the Sabra and Shatila massacre in the 1980s and volunteered to drive Gazan patients to their appointments at Israeli hospitals. The news of the death of the Bibas family, while only officially announced yesterday, cannot have come as a surprise to any Israeli: they were not released in November 2023, and we know that by the time of the current deal, at least, the numbers of living and dead hostages released by Hamas matched Israeli intelligence, but still, Hamas's cruel psychological warfare, which included faking pictures of the death of Daniella Gilboa, who was released alive, fuelled the optimism that so many people wished to cling to.

A rabbi friend of mine wrote an honest post on social media (I'm not quoting by name to protect their identity but it was a public post):

Yesterday I lit a memorial candle and two small candles at home. What does that help? What can be done? Maybe that's all that's left.

Soon I will travel to plant olive trees with [in a Palestinian area, in an interfaith gathering]. How far I am in my heart from peace, how much I believe in it as a distant dream...
I no longer believe in two states.
I do not believe that the Palestinians as a group want to live alongside us in peace.
I believe in planting olive trees and living in peace with anyone who is willing to live in peace with us.
I do believe in that: in planting olive trees in difficult moments. So that someone, one day, will enjoy the good oil of this land. And live in peace.

//

Today is a day for grief. But with the grief I feel rage.

Rage at Hamas for crossing every red line and spitting on the most basic image of humanity, including holding a sick ceremony this morning in front of hundreds of onlookers, with the coffins of the dead hostages in front of a backdrop of their pictures framed by blood. It is difficult to cope with this sadisic, manipulative cruelty even when I know that the manipulation is aimed at me, us, the Israeli public; aimed at manipulating us into baying for the war whose continuation is Hamas's only chance for survival.

Rage that though the Israeli leadership apparently knew of the fate of the Bibas family since November 2023 when they were not released in the ceasefire deal, yet declined to release that information until yesterday, because it was expedient for them for us to cling onto belief - just as ten years earlier, in 2014, they allowed us to pray for weeks for the safety of three teenage boys kidnapped by Hamas, while all the time they knew the boys had been murderd that day. Rage that they did not even release the information after Yarden Bibas was freed, leading him to spend his first two weeks of freedom in psychological torture, hoping for their release then having his hopes dashed - not to mention the psychological torture of the whole nation, for whom the Bibas children, more than anyone, represented the hostage crisis. Rage at the Israeli government who abandoned its citizens, before and after Oct 7, knowing that the bombing campaign would endanger the hostages who were being used as human shields. We don't know what happened to these four hostages, but we do know that not everything was done to free them and others.

My friend is right: it is hard to imagine how we get from here to peace. After our hearts have been shattered again and again for a year I find myself asking: is this it, is this the worst? Can we begin to rebuild now? Or do I need to continue to brace myself? But as he also wrote: even when the picture is dark, we must continue to plant trees, continue to plant the seeds of hope. Because if we don't merit to enjoy the fruits of the trees, we still must not give up hope that others will.

During the time I have spent writing the post, the bodies of the four hostages have been transferred first to the Red Cross then to Israeli hands. Oded, Shiri, Ariel and Kfir, your souls can go free now, as you return to the gentle earth from which you came. We all wish things had been otherwise, and our tears are both grief and guilt that they weren't. I hope that in the world of souls, Ariel Bibas is running alongside Hind Rajab while Kfir tries to catch up, while Shiri sits with Mohamed Abuel-Qomasan's wife and dotes over her twins, and Oded Lifshitz looks on with a grandfatherly smile.

May we merit to hold onto hope and remember the dead by planting the seeds that make things better, not worse.

למלחמה אין מנצחים
There are no winners in war

I feel for you @israelilefty

There is so little hope left but your strength is clear to see.

Completely agree with this!

Your post was very moving. Thank you.

A lot has happened with regards to hostages since your most recent post only two days ago - a lot of psychological warfare going on from Hamas with them originally not returning Shiri's body, the two male hostages today being forced to watch other hostages be released... It's too painful to think about any further right now, specially with the news of how brutally the poor children were murdered, so I want to ask instead how people are feeling after the failed attempts at absolute carnage by bombs on public transport? Are there even more security checks now than usual? It's crazy how I haven't really seen it mentioned at all in the UK. If any other country had foiled an attempt at mass murder like that it would be breaking news - in Israel it just seems to be accepted as part of life.

So incredibly sad that the bus bombings weren't even the saddest news to come out of Israel that day 😔

Honestly I haven't heard anyone even mention the bombs on public transport, other than one article where they found the young woman who warned of a suspicious object and prevented carnage because the driver diverted the bus back to the parking area, and a couple of people posted on social media about the miracle that nobody was injured, speculating that the timers on the bombs were set for 9pm instead of 9am.

There currently appears to be a gag order on publishing any details about the suspects, so I suppose more details will come out at a later point.

The bombing is certainly worrying and I'm sure people will be more vigilant for a while, but I doubt that it had a big impact on people's use of public transport - everyone's minds are too much on the other stories of the day.

Hi OP, just wondering if you're okay?

I'm also wondering if you're OK, OP. Your last updates are heartbreaking and things seem to be going from bad to worse. I hope you are somehow finding some calm in the eye of the storm. Sending you much love and support 💗

Another thinking of you & sending love & support.

First, thanks to those who left messages during the last few months. I have to admit that I gave up coming here - I was super busy with other things, and also just felt I didn’t have much to say. But since I know this space has sparked some meaningful conversations, and since I have some hours to write – as frankly I don’t see how I or anyone else in Israel is going to sleep tonight, as we count down the hours until the remaining hostages are safely home – I wanted to jot down some thoughts - hopefully final thoughts for now - here. I hope I am not writing too early. For the last two years we’ve learned nothing if not to keep our hopes on a low burner. But I’m sitting here in my Until the Last Hostage Returns T-shirt, fervently hoping that this will be the last time I wear it and tomorrow night it will turn into a PJ shirt.

The AMA still stands – I will try to answer anything asked in a respectful way.

But in the meantime, some thoughts:

The mood in Israel right now is incredibly emotional. I think it’s probably difficult for those outside Israel to understand the degree to which October 7 is still a gaping, open wound. A deep trauma was opened in Israeli society and until the last hostage is freed, it’s still an ongoing event. I can’t count the number of times newscasters have sounded on the verge of tears these last couple of days. There is extra poignancy about the timing: all this is taking place between the Western calendar anniversary (7 October) and the Hebrew calendar anniversary (Simchat Torah) of the attacks. Yes, it seemed like something might be on the horizon, but only five days ago, during the broadcast of the very moving national 7th October memorial, we were still far from a deal being a reality. Tomorrow night and Tuesday morning, we will head to the synagogue to celebrate Simchat Torah, the holiday on which all of our lives were suddenly thrown upside down two years ago.

It’s also hard to hold the complexity of what is going on: the joy and relief for the hostages coming home, particularly the 20 living hostages. Over the last two years we have come to know their names and faces, and the family members who have been doing everything possible to free them. To know that Einav Tzangauker will embrace Matan, Emily Damari will reunite with Zivi and Gali, Alon Ohel will play the piano once more, and so many more. But alongside this joy, complicating it if not diminishing it, are thoughts of the hostages killed in captivity - as well as thousands of Gazan civilians - who might have been saved had the deal been made earlier as various sources suggest it could have been if not for Bibi’s intransigence; the knowledge that some of the living hostages are in a very difficult medical condition; the heartbreaking pain of the many families who will not receive their loved ones’ remains for burial tomorrow, and some who may never do so; the fact that tomorrow night marks the Jewish memorial day (yahrzeit) for the approximately 1200 who were killed on October 7; and the fact that once again the deal involves the release from jail of some terrorists who perpetrated some appalling attacks against Israelis. I haven’t heard a single voice objecting to the deal (in fact it has an incredible 84% approval rating in Israel, which is virtually unheard of – since when did 84% of Israelis agree on anything?!!) but after Yahya Sinwar was released in the Shalit deal then went on to become the architect of October 7, nobody is complacent either. There are still inspiring voices like Yael Shevach, who said: if the release of the terrorist who murdered my husband is the price of returning the hostages, then I accept it gladly. I salute those who are able to make such a statement, and I understand those who cannot.

For the next two days we will all struggle to hold all of these things at the same time, and to do so with grace knowing that different people in the room are holding different experiences. And then, as the Jewish holidays come to an end, Wednesday is back to school and back to work day. If we have a national coping mechanism, it’s the return to routine, this time with the fervent hope that things will look different from now on.

I know from previous conversations that people will want to know what Israelis are saying about Gaza. At the moment, the news is focused on what is going on right now: the question of whether Hamas will retain power; clashes between Hamas and rival clans; Gazans returning to Gaza City; aid trucks entering. It’s too early for a national conversation beyond this, and even news commentators are sticking to the here and now. I am personally grateful and relieved that a ceasefire deal has been reached that both takes into account the short and long term needs of Gazans and seems to be serious about creating mechanisms to build a better future

To close, how does a war change a person? The short answer is, I don’t know. This isn't the first time I've remarked here that I was relatively little impacted by the war compared to so many others. But still, it has hit close to home. I’ve seen a friend lose a son and another have a son severely injured and traumatised. I’ve seen the neighbourhood park I used to sit in three years ago with my then toddler be blown up by an Iranian missile. I’ve sat through surreal nights and days in the shelter – and that’s in one of the quietest parts of the country. I’ve missed feeling real, simple joy. I’ve seen my country commit war crimes and abandon hostages and no amount of protest seem to be effective. I’ve found myself feeling further and further from the (other) country in which I grew up, as I see an eagerness among many on the left to condemn Israel blot out any kind of space for nuanced, informed discussion. I’ve almost completely stopped posting on social media because I can’t stand the performative statements. Above all, I’ve learned not to take anything for granted, because the world as you know it can change overnight – again and again. I’ve tried to hold onto my values and work for a better tomorrow if I can’t change today. But I’ve also been deeply inspired by the incredible Israeli people, from across the geographic and political spectrum but far from positions of power, who have humbled us all by stepping up again and again with inner strength and moral clarity when the government lacked any basic decency. Rachel and Jon Goldberg-Polin. Eli Sharabi. Keith and Aviva Siegel. Yair Golan. Emily Damari. Liri Albag. Rachel from Ofakim. I hope that their voices will remain strong as we move forward.

@israelilefty thank you for posting again. I am just going to let your words sink in. I have family in Israel and the anxiety of these days and ‘what if’s’ Are enormous. It’s almost as if I can’t believe life is just continuing. I so want it to be over. So that Israel can begin to heal. So they can heal.

i won’t say anymore but holding you in my thoughts over the coming hours and days.

It's so good to hear your kind, articulate voice again OP and to know that you are safe. As a complete stranger on the other side of the world, I can't begin to process or describe my own mixture of tentative optimism and helpless anxiety about what is about to unfold, so I can't imagine what it must be like to be living in Israel or Gaza right now. The past two years have been marked by such searing pain that it is hard to know what the future will bring. Maybe it's like lancing a boil, and now the healing can begin? I pray with all my heart for peace and calm to return. Thank you for posting here again, and wishing you a joyful Simchat Torah with much to celebrate. 💗

Thank you for updating @israelilefty - your compassion, strength & resilience shine through. Wishing you, your family, the hostages & Israeli society as a whole all the very best in the coming days & hoping for a peaceful & prosperous future for you all. Much love xx

Sending love and hoping with you ❤️

Thank you so much for your thoughtful update, OP, and indeed for this whole thread. My thoughts are with you, and with all who have suffered so horribly through this terrible conflict x