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AMA
Original poster

I’ve been in a coma and “died”. AMA

139 replies

GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 16:53

9 years ago after I ended up in a medically induced coma (and on ECMO) for around a month. Twice; once when in the coma and once afterwards I coded and they had to bring me back.

Ask me anything.

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 21/02/2023 16:54

Were you able to see yourself in ICU?

Turtletumy · 21/02/2023 16:55

The obvious question I’m afraid.
Do you remember anything from while you were in the coma?
Glad you recovered

Toooldtoworry · 21/02/2023 16:57

I 'died' of meningitis and felt at peace with the fact I was dying. Did you feel the same?

NewBrightonEel · 21/02/2023 16:57

We're you aware of anything? We're you scared? My daughter came off ECMO but died before they could wake her from the coma. I just need to know.

Minteraye · 21/02/2023 16:59

Sorry know this isn’t the point of the thread but this is a bugbear of mine – you only die once, if you’re still here you didn’t die.

Lambchop1 · 21/02/2023 17:00

Were u aware u were dying? Did you see light or anything that resembled an after life?

Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 17:05

Turtletumy · 21/02/2023 16:55

The obvious question I’m afraid.
Do you remember anything from while you were in the coma?
Glad you recovered

Certain conversations family remember having with at me knitted themselves into my “dreams”/delusions/hallucinations, but I don’t remember anything for two months (2-3 weeks pre coma to after I was brought around).

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Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 17:07

Toooldtoworry · 21/02/2023 16:57

I 'died' of meningitis and felt at peace with the fact I was dying. Did you feel the same?

No, unfortunately. I was made to do test after test by “a higher power” (I’m not religious) and at one point everything just stopped and I was in nothingness. She told me I’d failed and she was going to leave me in this nothingness vacuum forever if I failed one more test.
(coma dreams are weird. I assume from all the drugs)

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Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 17:10

NewBrightonEel · 21/02/2023 16:57

We're you aware of anything? We're you scared? My daughter came off ECMO but died before they could wake her from the coma. I just need to know.

I’m hesitant to answer this as the reality was that a lot of my dreams were terrifying.

I definitely sensed my family, and they were never part of the scary parts. Their presence was always a comfort.

I’m so so sorry for your loss.

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Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 17:13

Minteraye · 21/02/2023 16:59

Sorry know this isn’t the point of the thread but this is a bugbear of mine – you only die once, if you’re still here you didn’t die.

Tell Buffy that 😉

The quote marks suggested there was a slight flippancy to the term “died”, seeing as I’m still here, but saying that, that’s what the consultants referred to it as so 🤷‍♀️

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Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 17:15

TheShellBeach · 21/02/2023 16:54

Were you able to see yourself in ICU?

No, never had an out of body experience. When I woke up I thought I’d been gone for 3 years. All the dreams I believed wholeheartedly had happened.

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VariantHela · 21/02/2023 17:36

NewBrightonEel · 21/02/2023 16:57

We're you aware of anything? We're you scared? My daughter came off ECMO but died before they could wake her from the coma. I just need to know.

Sending you so much love x

Hotcuppatea · 21/02/2023 17:39

How are you now? Do you have flashbacks?

ChesterDrawsStickmen · 21/02/2023 17:55

Why did they put you in a coma?

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 21/02/2023 18:50

NewBrightonEel · 21/02/2023 16:57

We're you aware of anything? We're you scared? My daughter came off ECMO but died before they could wake her from the coma. I just need to know.

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I don't imagine it will be of much comfort, but I was in an induced coma many years ago and very nearly died. To this day I have quite a vivid recollection of a moment of being aware of this, and being very at peace with it. I wasn't scared. And up to that point in life I'd always been terrified about death.

2Blackcat · 21/02/2023 19:08

Poor you. I was in intensive care a few years ago & the person next to me was on ECMO... they brought him out for a few minutes to explain he was in the hospital and very ill and then put him back under. Very strange to listen too. Each time I have been ventilated (so obviously not as bad) I have ended up thinking I am in a strange soap where some of the actors are trying to poison me.

2Blackcat · 21/02/2023 19:10

I am sorry to hear about your daughter.

Bodybags · 21/02/2023 19:11

What do you remember about your nurses?
Do you remember them talking to you, caring for you, moving you and encouraging you?
Was this comforting?

2Blackcat · 21/02/2023 19:13

Ps in my case it was only when I was back in a normal ward I started to think I was in my own soap. I have no memory of being unconscious/ recovery .

Livedandlearned · 21/02/2023 19:15

I was also on a coma for a week and remember absolutely nothing except maybe waking up.

I was only 9 so it was a long time ago.

Sending love to anyone who had a family member who has been in that sort of situation.

NewBrightonEel · 21/02/2023 19:25

Thank you @WhatWouldTheDoctorDo - it's haunted me for three years that she might have been aware and scared - you've put my mind at rest xx

Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 21:02

ChesterDrawsStickmen · 21/02/2023 17:55

Why did they put you in a coma?

I had a premature baby for seemingly no reason (him being premature). A missed womb infection ended up as double septic pneumonia.
I had him on the 12th, they discharged me the same day as they didn’t have a bed suitable (as I didn’t have my baby with me and they needed my individual room). Called me in to a side room two days later and said I was showing a strep infection, that as I wasn’t a patient they shouldn’t give me anything but take these antibiotics. I took the 5 day course. Two days after it ended I came down with a 40 degree fever. Went straight to the gp who did a urine test, listened to my chest and took great delight in explaining he was a premature baby and how he was fine. Told me it was probably viral and to come back in two weeks if I wasn’t better.
10 days later I was in a&e and I don’t remember anything after being moved to the first ward and texting my husband to say I’d been sick, and that hearing women with their babies was really hard.
(my baby was in a different hospital as he was too premature to be born at our local one).

I was sedated early on, apparently and then put in a coma to be put on ECMO and taken to Papworth (old campus).

OP posts:
ChaoticCrumble · 21/02/2023 21:05

Poor you OP. How was your baby and how was bonding after that experience? (Fwiw I think too much can be made of the term bonding, I don’t want to make you feel bad)

Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 21:11

Hotcuppatea · 21/02/2023 17:39

How are you now? Do you have flashbacks?

It took a long time. Physically I had to learn how to move every limb again (heads are heavy). I couldn’t even move my fingers. It’s the weirdest feeling not being able to move any muscle in your body. I was in a wheelchair for a while.

Mentally took a lot harder. I thought I’d been gone for years, had hurt a lot of my family, got captured whilst saving the beluga whales by Putin/Kim jon un, sexually assaulted, had my identity stolen, ruined my best friend’s wedding, been held in an insane asylum, given test after test by this “higher power”, had quintuplets and so many more scenarios. Ultimately I thought I’d been found because my family saw my face on a milk carton.

All through this I knew I’d abandoned my “real” children. I was so ashamed I pretended I had amnesia and didn’t remember. It was only when I alluded to the fact that I killed Putin that everyone looked very uncomfortably at each other and the nurses told my family they had to tell me the truth. I had no idea I’d been in a coma or they’d been with me the whole time.

OP posts:
Original poster
GhostFaen · 21/02/2023 21:17

Bodybags · 21/02/2023 19:11

What do you remember about your nurses?
Do you remember them talking to you, caring for you, moving you and encouraging you?
Was this comforting?

They were utterly amazing. Once I was aware I felt like I recognised most of them. They gave me dignity where I had none and comforted me when I had hallucinations and anxiety attacks. It’s definitely like a little family in the ICU. I was only 24 (turned 25 in the coma) and they got rather emotionally invested in me and my family. When he was old enough they moved my baby to the hospital I was in (pre and post Papworth) and when I’d woken up they’d wheel him to me daily.

My family got so much support from the whole staff.

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