I've had 4 home births AMA

[homebirthAMA]

4 kids, 4 home births AMA.

Mainly because there seems to be lots of misconceptions about home birth on the internet (less so in RL)

Just a preemptive note:
I won't be replying to any offensive attacks (because I have self respect) and I won't be providing endless links for 'evidence' - please do you own homework or ask your midwife for that sort of thing. I can talk about our experiences and viewpoint. :)

They are not supposed to, the home birth team on my area won't do it and will state the risks of asked. Cord prolapse is the biggest risk they want to avoid at home. Might be area dependent like you say.

In my area the NHS homebirth team support women who choose to birth "against advice", they told me they do lots of Vbacs and post dates. This didn't apply to me but I loved they respected women's choices.

Oh you'll have a lovely speedy 3rd birth I bet :)

I loved the water with the first 3 and I was so sure I 'needed' it but dc4 wasn't going to wait for anything so he was a dry birth, which I had hated the idea of previously but it was pretty much the same comfort wise and absolutely fine. No tearing either.

I recommend the pool, the tens machine, something nice to listen to (I had some hynobirthing tracks). Black towels. Snacks. I was quite minimalist I think.

Just jumping on to say I had a homebirth with DC2. I felt so completely peaceful with my decision and also very sure that I would transfer in if anything felt ‘off’. It was the best experience ever. Really lovely to read some homebirth positivity and some excellent responses to the ‘my SIL would have died at home’ - ‘but she wouldn’t have been on the hormone drip which ran her uterus ragged’ type comments that always get trotted out.

Things go terribly wrong in hospital and a lot of it is due to medicalisation. Things can also go terribly wrong at home. Very much personal choice and if you’re ‘low risk’ I don’t think it’s a silly choice at all.

That's amazing, especially in this day and age. I've had my first birth at home and hope to have the others at home too.

I had 2 hospital births but very straightforward and natural. Please don't be too scared women have been doing it for thousands of years, it can really be absolutely fine. FWIW breaking my collar bone hurt far more.

No real questions, just were you not worried about I'd something went wrong.
DS was healthy throughout pregnancy, extra scans as he was a big size, born blue with a large CDH they hadn't identified. Immediately intubated. Do they provisions for that kind of stuff with a home birth?

I'm aware our case was v unusual, I'm stl v impressed a close friend went ahead with a happy healthy home birth 4 months later

And so consequently no way I'd have considered it for my twins.

No question but just to say I think it’s a lovely thing to do - not an option for me but a few friends had home births and they sounded very special ❤️

Honestly I was more worried about all the things that go wrong in hospitals.

Yes the mws carry everything for resuscitation.

The only thing you don't have at home is a surgical theatre.

Thank you ❤️

Amazing! 🥰

@homebirthAMA yourw right what is always missing from the ‘if I / my SIL / best friend had been at home they would have died’ is the details on what happened to them in hospital.

so in the case of PPH that can be brought on by a lot of things that happen in hospital, from
induction drugs, to the disturbed nature of labour which makes it longer, to disturbing the mother post birth and not enabling her to be with her baby fast enough (that contact prompts the placenta to be delivered) to Drs or midwives cutting the cord too early or ‘helping’ the placenta to come by pulling on the cord.

i REALLY wanted a home birth. I’d almost won my DH over when we got sucked into a conversation with some friends who told us their hospital horror stories and freaked him out.

he would have gone along with it if I’d insisted but with a stillbirth in the family I needed positive backing from him not ‘ok if you must’.

i deeply wish now I’d booked a home north and promised him we’d go in. Or booked a private midwife with a similar promise.

i laboured to 8cm at home with my first. Went in feeling great. But the move to hospital stalled my labour (as it so often does). I RRALLY wanted the pool but that room was occupied when we got there.

i was cold in the room, couldn’t get warm and in the postion i wanted in the bath (a bath is NOT the same as the pool). My notes say I had a 10 hour pushing phase (I didn’t, nothing was happening most of that time).

eventually the drip, ventouse and a PPH.

i still feel me and my baby were robbed by other peoples fears 😢

I'm so sorry that happened to you @Catsstillrock . Sadly I think stories like yours are not unusual.

I think homebirth mws see lots of second time mums who will say things like you have just said. Do you think you'll go again or are you done?

Thanks for the answer OP. I definitely understand the appeal of a home birth but couldn't realistically consider it but now someone who had a wonderful one.

It was her second baby. The first birth had gone a very similar way and became an emergency very quickly and doctors were adamant it wasn't safe to deliver the second baby at home. They wanted an elective c section.

I had to fight to have my ds at home 28 years ago as it wasn’t recommended then. But I was induced with my first and didn’t want to go thru that again. I also had dd2 at home. By the time I had ds2 in 2001 the doctors had given up trying to persuade me to have a hosp birth, but I was blue lighted to hospital with ds2 and he had to be transferred to hospital in Leicester and put on ECMO.
I still think it’s much less stressful to have them at home though…well unless you haven’t planned to!

This.

Oh pish. No one ever wants to balance the risks of hospital births/intervention when they’re anti homebirth. There are so many instances of medical abuse and hospital deaths, let’s talk about those too shall we?

And eyeroll at being “allowed” a home birth. Are you a handmaid?

OP - my first baby will be a homebirth. Have received a heap of coercion from mws and family/friends who have advised against it for a first baby. I like to gently remind them how many women have had first babies outside of a hospital throughout human history.

Breaking news: world about to combust because @homebirthAMA has four kids!!

That's great @rocksonrocks, I didn't bother discussing the choice with anyone except DH and the mws first time around.

If you need stitches can the home birth midwife do it? (assuming it’s not too serious) or do you end up having to go to hospital? I’d consider a homebirth but had stitches with my first two and don’t like the thought of a nice relaxed birth at home and then ending up at hospital over an hour away anyway just for stitches

Home birth is also the eco/low waste option for birthers for the eco conscious

Yes I think up to second degree but tearing is rare at home. I didn't tear at all and I declined to be checked for tears for the last 3.

I would have birthed at home and transferred afterwards if necessary.

I had a BBA for DD and it was brilliant. I did plan a homebirth but it turns out I labour quite well and despite being told I wasn't in proper labour, merrily delivered her into DH's hands in the bedroom. Midwife arrived about 10 mins later (DH called her when we realised I was crowing).

Second birth was DTs so in hospital. It was 'technically' fine. But grim from my perspective and I still feel quite traumatised by it 10 months on.

I'd have another homebirth with any subsequent babies, but obviously with one singleton and then the twins, we've also ruined the planet 😬🤷🏽‍♀️

My BBA was my favourite birth, also caught by DH.

I think I'd find hospital traumatic too after my experiences.

Roll on number 4....🤣