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AMA

I'm a boarding school Housemistress. AMA

117 replies

HMno1 · 21/12/2022 17:19

Time on my hands.

OP posts:
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mizu · 21/12/2022 21:04

And what's the pay like? You say you don't teach much?

I'm a teacher - 27 years in - and might want a change when DDs leave for uni in a couple of years........

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Reindeersnooker · 21/12/2022 21:10

Would you definitely notice if a child was unhappy or struggling?

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HMno1 · 21/12/2022 21:14

mizu · 21/12/2022 21:04

And what's the pay like? You say you don't teach much?

I'm a teacher - 27 years in - and might want a change when DDs leave for uni in a couple of years........

£53k for me, but we also have a huge house too. No bills or rent which is welcome right now.

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HMno1 · 21/12/2022 21:17

Reindeersnooker · 21/12/2022 21:10

Would you definitely notice if a child was unhappy or struggling?

I would hope so. We try to get to know them really well so when there is a change in behaviour we know something is up. Some will carry on as usual for a while even when something is bothering them, and that is tricky to spot. It worries me that lots could go under the radar if we're not totally on the ball.

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belge2 · 21/12/2022 21:21

I was at boarding school and my house mistress was a mad woman! Clearly hated children, had 2 horrible poodles and tried to chat up all the dads at drop off times! We all used to laugh about her. Sorry I got distracted- funny memories!

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HMno1 · 21/12/2022 21:25

belge2 · 21/12/2022 21:21

I was at boarding school and my house mistress was a mad woman! Clearly hated children, had 2 horrible poodles and tried to chat up all the dads at drop off times! We all used to laugh about her. Sorry I got distracted- funny memories!

Oh god sounds awful! Hope you had a good time regardless! Can't have been good for those who needed a bit of care and attention!

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wannarunfromitall · 21/12/2022 21:31

53k and a free house is a good career move! Would def consider doing this as a shift from teaching.

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flowerycurtain · 21/12/2022 21:31

53k!! Blimey o Riley.

My kids are are friends with lots of boarding school teachers kids. They have the most fun with the older girls (mine are primary).

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mizu · 21/12/2022 21:33

Wowsers to £53 K. About £20,000 more than I'm on now!

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HMno1 · 21/12/2022 21:35

I think I'm on more than some hms because I'm also a teacher. I'm on less than other hms as other schools pay way more than mine!

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happiertimes123 · 21/12/2022 21:47

Do your family have a flat within the large house with your own kitchen etc or is it all together?

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Tryfull · 21/12/2022 21:59

taxi4ballet · 21/12/2022 20:49

If she wants to audition for September 2023 entry you need to get your skates on because auditions are already under way, and some schools have closed their lists and are not accepting any more applications.

Yes we're in the middle of auditions now. She has made it to RBS semi-finals and we are applying to one other ballet school. It's her dream but I'm kind of in denial as I can't bear the thought of her living away from home 😪. It's the only way she can get top quality training though.

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HMno1 · 21/12/2022 23:53

happiertimes123 · 21/12/2022 21:47

Do your family have a flat within the large house with your own kitchen etc or is it all together?

We have a house attached to the boarding house. Shortest commute ever!

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taxi4ballet · 22/12/2022 00:02

Tryfull · 21/12/2022 21:59

Yes we're in the middle of auditions now. She has made it to RBS semi-finals and we are applying to one other ballet school. It's her dream but I'm kind of in denial as I can't bear the thought of her living away from home 😪. It's the only way she can get top quality training though.

Well done to her, and the very best of luck. It isn't the end of the world if they don't get into full-time training that early though. With a good local teacher and if there is an associate programme she can access as well, then there's plenty of time. She can carry on auditioning every year, and a lot more places open up at 16+ anyway.

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Buckland123 · 22/12/2022 16:19

Is it possible to do your job with no prior experience? I would love to do it, but I’m not a teacher.

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SurpriseSparDay · 22/12/2022 16:24

Again, not my thread, but @Buckland123 - if you were a parent (and maybe paying £40k pa) with a child at boarding school, would you want a completely inexperienced person in charge of their care and wellbeing?

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Pelo22 · 22/12/2022 16:36

SurpriseSparDay · 22/12/2022 16:24

Again, not my thread, but @Buckland123 - if you were a parent (and maybe paying £40k pa) with a child at boarding school, would you want a completely inexperienced person in charge of their care and wellbeing?

I guess it depends what relevant experience they've got
Stuff like carer/ambulance service/NHS/social services would all be something I would be happy with someone having done before

If they've never come across a child or done anything vaguely relevant then no Grin

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marcopront · 22/12/2022 16:42

everydaysabeginning · 21/12/2022 19:34

Will many have to spend Christmas there? I feel that's really sad.

Not my thread but I teach in an international boarding school.

Out of 130 A'level equivalent residential students we have 23 staying in school accommodation over the break and probably another 20 travelling in the country.
Combination of flight prices and long journeys home,
We always have a couple who don't go home for the two years they are with us.

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Cheshiresun · 22/12/2022 16:44

Do you find most of parents work away - is that the main reason for sending them to boarding school?

How much are the total school fees per child annually?

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SurpriseSparDay · 22/12/2022 16:57

@marcopront Different world! Across two or three generations of ‘full’ boarding I’ve never known a school with either the facilities or inclination to keep a child over holidays. All the schools I’ve had anything to do with this century (prep and senior ‘public’ schools) close every few weeks for exeats, where everyone goes home or to their guardians for the weekend - and none of the staff stay in school over holidays, at all! Had no idea that still happened in the UK.

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marcopront · 22/12/2022 16:58

SurpriseSparDay · 22/12/2022 16:57

@marcopront Different world! Across two or three generations of ‘full’ boarding I’ve never known a school with either the facilities or inclination to keep a child over holidays. All the schools I’ve had anything to do with this century (prep and senior ‘public’ schools) close every few weeks for exeats, where everyone goes home or to their guardians for the weekend - and none of the staff stay in school over holidays, at all! Had no idea that still happened in the UK.

I'm not in the UK.
Sorry I didn't make that clear.

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SurpriseSparDay · 22/12/2022 17:07

Relieved to hear it!

Definitely not a thing here.

(I have assumed the OP is wanting to help people understand the UK boarding system?)

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Pearfacebanana · 22/12/2022 17:11

If you also have day pupils are they treated as second class?

(Looking at a boarding school with day option. Some people say day pupils don't get treated as well. Unsure of this myself).

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marcopront · 22/12/2022 17:20

SurpriseSparDay · 22/12/2022 17:07

Relieved to hear it!

Definitely not a thing here.

(I have assumed the OP is wanting to help people understand the UK boarding system?)

I think it will be.
We have students on scholarships who cannot afford to travel home.
We have students who would take so long to get home it isn't worth it.
I am sure there are schools in the UK where that is the case.

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WorriedMillie · 22/12/2022 17:27

You sound lovely, OP, I’m sure you’re a great comfort to students who are struggling

DD’s school friend is a houseparents’ daughter, she has a great life. DD loves staying over in the boarding house, it’s such an adventure ❤️

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