Autistic and Employed - AMA

[JohnMcCainsDeathStare]

I am a 40-year-old person who works in STEM who is happy to answer questions about being autistic and employment and some of the issues I have encountered - both positive and negative. This also includes secondary employment and the invisible barriers that I have encountered during recruitment. I am hoping that people who do work in recruitment especially see this.

I will check back here but as I want to answer questions properly this might me little and often. Similar questions may be addresssed together.

What would you say is the most frequent barrier/issue you come up against?

How long have you known you were autistic? (I suspect I am and that it would explain many issues I have had all my life).
How has it affected you at work?

Dawglover

I would say the most frequent barrier is my ignorance of non-verbal cues and communication - I have struggled with the existence of rules that NT people just 'know' but I have had to learn from scratch since you do need to know them to function and even now I still make mistakes. This can sometimes be a blessing as I might be oblivious to low-level bitching and not 'know' social hierarchies.

I have never been able to fathom the 'rules that are so important that no-one tells you them' mentality since if they were that important, you would tell people right?

Having said that, it is not as if I'm ignorant of hierarchy, you need to have a chain of command for processes to function and that people know whom to go to but it is the unspoken social rules I often have no awareness off. On the flipside, since I speak to anyone whether it is a Fellow of the Royal Society, a teen on the bus or the cleaner n the same way it means that people don't see me as someone who is going to use them or see them as a lesser being. This can put the wind up someone who thinks I should be somehow more subservient to them when I don't recognise that but see it important to be polite and courteous to everyone.

A bit longwinded but I hope this answers some questions.

Do you recommend ticking the Disability box on job applications, or do you think it is better to get the job first then tell your employer once you are settled in?

I get more interviews when I don't tick the box.

obligatorync

How long have you known you were autistic?

I think since my early 20's but my mum and some of my teachers I suspect had come to the conclusion I wasn't NT. Thing is Asperger's syndrome as a definition didn't come into use until about 1991. I do think I had suspicions before then - I was always somewhat blind to body language and tone of voice. I would sometimes get into trouble for being rude when I thought I was answering a question.
For instance, "would you like to brush your hair"
"no"
It's only when I got told off for being rude did I realise that wasn't a question but an order. But I was generally obedient.

I have always struggled when people don't tell me what I need to know.

Also I have always been a tomboy and an unabashed nerd but have always had long hair. This meant that girls couldn't stand me because I was either too quiet or just weird and boys couldn't stand me because I did not fit in with expectations and attempts at sexual bullying getting my attention was rebuffed. I grew up in a former mining town where reasonably strict gender roles are a thing. I never got this because both my parents always worked.

School was a strange and miserable existence but it set the tone for me to focus on my exit plan since my hope death was at a young age and I left my town without a backwards glance at 18.

So I had suspicions in my teens but didn't 'know' until mid 20s - bear in mind I am a demograph that apparently doesn't exist for most people. I only got an official diagnosis just before my 38th birthday after the conclusion of a particularly horrible round of jobseeking.

AspergersMom

Not sure about that - I only did that AFTER I accepted my new position. It's hard to quantify - I would not really describe myself as disabled but situations and systems can make me disabled if they inhibit my normal functioning.

For me it isn't getting interviews that is the problem - it is just that HR people when they see me suddenly don't want to know even if my CV hits the spot. It's like what they see on the CV and what they see in me are mutually incompatible.

I'm still around for questions - I might discuss the barriers I have found during jobseeking.

@JohnMcCainsDeathStare - can I ask, what barriers you have faced during jobseeking?

Also, do you have children and if so, do any of them have a diagnosis of autism?

Would you suggest mainstream or specialist autism schools for kids with aspergers today, as far as being employable in STEM or being able to go on to uni?

For me, the barriers I found during jobseeking only seemed to be apparent during my last jobseeking cycle in 2017. I have a wide set of highly desirable ( not to mention expensive!) skills, except until it was apparent it was me that has them. It took me a whole year of jobseeking to get an equivalent position.
I am aware that you cannot assume you are going to get any job you apply but I started getting suspicious when my co-workers (we were all being made redundant at the same time) were getting offers but I wasn't. I was getting plenty of interviews, I had an interview coach - it was just that I never got any offers.
I was doing all the 'right' things but I seemed to be mostly having the skills to creep people out. Unless the interview was an actual shitishow, my perception of the interview and any feedback I got would often be at odds - that is if I ever got any feedback. So afer 8-9 months of this I wondered that perhaps I am not as good as masking as I thought. I was working in an engineering firm and had done so for the best part of a decade - I got on well with my co-workers and to them I was 'normal' for me. But evidently I was very strange and unsettling in a job interview.
I am still not sure why I creep out recruiters/HR people but I do wonder that when I'm in an interview with people who don't know me they are seeing 3 people in one - a much younger person (I apparently have a very youthful mannerism and voice, a much older person (I come across as very knowledgeable) but these both seem at odds with my appearence as a late-30's woman apparently.

Some of the bias could also be a result of being a woman in STEM - for instance there is a tendency for recruiters (perhaps driven by algorithms) that tend to not send more R&D-based job opportunities but those related such as Health and Safety or compliance.

So, TL,DR I don't really have much of a direct answer to this question other than I suspect HR people and recruiters knowlege of autism and autism in the workplace. That and the fact that 'Hollywood autism' is a thing and autistic women don't exist...

How do your colleagues get on with your autism? Do they make an effort to accommodate you or do they expect you to be the one to make concessions in order to fit in with the team?

My DS is nearly 21 and is unemployable at the moment due to autism. He has difficulty with academic learning meaning he has next to no qualifications and doesn't enjoy education, and he has so many phobias, anxieties, sensory issues and inflexible thinking that he can't really get a job that doesn't need huge amounts of qualifications either as he can't cope with the environment and the people. I guess my question is did you find things very difficult yet end up employed? Do we need to prepare for DS being out of work for life? The GP won't help him with claiming LCW on universal credit as they argue he's not disabled as he is not physically incapable of work and has an acceptable level of general knowledge.

I will answer as many questions as possible so these are still to AspergersMum

In terms of my children - my oldest has been diagnosed with ASD and my youngest is pending - they both have some adjustments at school in terms of quiet places to go. My oldest is going to secondary school this year so I'm somewhat apprehensive about this - secondary school kinda sucks when you have undiagnosed SEN from my point of view.

In terms of school, that would depend on the degree of severity of ASD, if there are any co-morbidities and also on the preferences of the child themselves.

My oldest wants to remain in mainstream education because he wants to avoid being in a bubble - he does see the importance of mixing with a wide demographic of people even if it is with its difficultes. In terms of the private sector I don't know that much about it but much of the expertise is still within the state sector.

OP, thanks for doing this. As a Mum of a kid with ASD, this sort of thing really helps my understanding

Do you ever get burnout as a result of the workplace? If so, how do you deal with it?

In general, my interactions with my colleagues are positive in that they know they can ask me things and I will help them to the best of their ability while being aware of my limitations. Similarly, I am not averse to asking for help and being aware of their expertise.

The times I have had difficulties is when I have been working in a toxic environment (e.g. factory in an industrial estate with people who have something of a 'bag of crabs' mentality) or from people who are part of the organisation but who don't work directly with me e.g people who work in positions somewhat removed from me who might just see erratic working practices and apparent absences when in fact they are completely within reasonable expectations and comply within the law - that is what makes me vulnerable.

So, in terms of my significant co-workers, it hasn't been so much of a problem since apparently it is obvious to anyone who has any knowledge to ASD even without me saying anything (I only got a diagnosis in 2017 after paying for it).

DrCoconut

There is no easy way for me to answer this - I believe that most people are capable of employment. I am not sure how to approach the issues of employment - it will also have to be a problem your Ds needs to engage with as well.
I would firstly discuss this with his current school/education first and any employers there is contact with.
Also flag up issues with the DWP, but then my interactions with the DWP have been somewhat negative as they are so underfunded and undermined in their current incarnation that they seem to stamp on any initative their employees might use and seem more focused on threatening people rather than helping them into work.

But I digress and perhaps approach charities that deal with SEND young adults who have connections with local business who could take him on in future.

I wish you luck on this - I would not despair but also you are both going to have to fight for this - keep all your records intact and save any correspondance whatever route you take.

Burnout at work - I work in STEM and when it is your career it does tend to also be something that defines you somewhat. I find it sometimes happens if there are conferences/deadlines/papers and falling into an obsessive workflow - this can happen if you have a load of dud samples or am finding something interesting.
But burnout tends to be not just work-related, usually related to not having much child-free time, the DCs are awesome but they are very demanding and like to talk ALL THE TIME - draining if you are an introvert.

Thanks for this OP, it's really helpful. One of my dc's has ASD and like a pp it really worries me that they will be unemployable due to very high anxiety levels and the need to constantly withdraw to avoid being overwhelmed. He finds even acknowledging the diagnosis extremely difficult (I am making it up for my own benefit apparently ) which brings me to my question: do you announce your ASD in new situations to let employers/colleagues know, or do you just assume that they will realize?

Have just seen this. It's very interesting to me as I also am diagnosed on the autistic spectrum. I do exactly the same as you - speak to everyone in the same way no matter what their station. This has led to some of the shareholders in my business complaining that I show them no deference and one of them even employs someone to act as an interface when dealing with me. This is despite my going to great lengths to try not to be rude and upset anyone.