I'm an amputee..ask me anything!

[HappinessIsKey]

Thought I would start a thread, as a young (ish) woman, who has had a below knee amputation..

Since having my leg removed friends and family have always had a lot of questions about what's it's like etc..

I constantly get stared at and sometimes even followed, when I go out. So I thought I would start a thread to answer questions people have about it..

You ask me whatever you like, I will answer them!

Don't worry I'm a rough cookie, so can handle any questions 😊

hearhear on the issue of shorts, it took my DP several years to pluck up the courage to wear them. It is true that perhaps people do assume that he is former armed forces and yes that is quite amusing now. However, please do not suggest that men who wear shorts with prosthetics have an easier time than anyone else. Nobody with a prosthetic limb has an easy time. It’s challenging and mentally gruelling for all amputees. I find you post really offensive to be honest.

hearhear I absolutely agree with howwudufeel regarding the shorts issues. My husband was embarrassed to start with especially as he has massive scarring all down his other leg where he had a bypass before having a partial foot amputation but it was just too much effort for him to struggle with trousers for getting dressed, going to the loo etc He wears shorts because it's so much easier and he has enough other struggles to contend with. He certainly doesn't think it's because people will think he's a war hero and me gets some kind of kudos for that.

@howwud, I meant no offence and I apologise for any that has been caused

Thanks for the apology hearhear.

My post was clumsily worded I should have put more thought into what I said and l'm sorry, I really didn't mean that anyone has an easy time of it as an amputee, I can see from this thread that there are huge challenges and difficulties that the rest of us just don't know about

When I worked with military amputees, one told me that he was always got now because his surface area to volume ratio had changed which made me chuckle but also made sense.

He was a double above knee amputee.

Upthread there was mention of mirror therapy for phantom limb pain, I wonder if the OP has been able to explore this option?

Also, a lot of the double amputees were a lot shorter so their centre of gravity was lower & made using prosthetics easier. One who's a paralympian now was too heavy for prostheses I seem to recall.
It's fascinating. Thanks again OP.

I have nothing to add. But bloody hell, you are amazing OP. And a really good writer.

@VQ19, my apologies extend to you also, I hope you will be able to accept them

Thank you Hearhear

To be fair, there's always misconceptions about things you don't really understand because you've never had to. It's through threads like this that we can all learn about different things.

Talking of centre of gravity, we went swimming for the first time about two years ago on a cruise ship and he found it very difficult - not having the weight of both legs meant that when he tried to swim, his top half just kept sinking! He loved being in the water and being upright and spent most of his time just floating around enjoying the freedom.

I really don't think @Hearhere meant anything offensive in their post.

I really don't think that people would presume male amputees have had an easier ride than female amputees, by making a presumption of how they lost their limb.

It was just a question I had to my specialist and limb maker. Over the years after meeting and speaking to hundreds of amputees they have told me the same. People presume that men have lost their limb in battle and are 'war heroes' where as every single woman I have spoken to, we get the same assumptions made. We were either born like it, or have an illness resulting in losing a limb.

I fully understand that loved ones of amputees, can be very defensive and protective over us.
In my case my partner is extremely protective.

You will know @VQ1970 and @howwudufeel that over the years friends and family will of felt comfortable enough to ask the most silly questions! Things that seem just pure common sense to us, but we live with it day in day out, and they innocently just don't know.
But people that aren't amputees or have a loved one that is an amputee, won't feel comfortable enough to ask those questions to a stranger.

That is why I wanted to do this thread. It was to give posters the opportunity to ask whatever questions they like anonymously.
Giving them more information and educating.

This is only a positive in my opinion and I truly hope it is for all amputees or loved ones reading this thread.

I really hope, that people aren't put off asking whatever questions they have, no matter how silly it may sound xx

People presume that men have lost their limb in battle and are 'war heroes' where as every single woman I have spoken to, we get the same assumptions made. We were either born like it, or have an illness resulting in losing a limb
I feel this speaks to a cultural predisposition to see women as victims and men as heroes

@VQ1970 I can completely relate to that!

I use to be a fairly good swimmer, but now I just sink if I try and swim!

But the feeling of just being upright in the water, is truly amazing! It's very hard to describe but you just feel free, if that makes sense. There is nothing like it!

I don't have the confidence to use a public swimming pool, so holidays cost us an absolute fortune, as we have to have a private pool. I really wish I did though. Your partner sounds amazing!

@HappinessIsKey I love that you call it your little leg. So much more personal than a stump!

hearhere I don’t think my DP feels like a hero when strangers shout ‘cripple’ at him in the street.

Hi OP! I’m left handed and have recently paralysed my entire left hand. Do you think you would have been challenged in the same ways had the amputated area had remained but been permanently paralysed instead? (Sorry if that’s awfully phrased! Everyone keeps asking me but in reverse and I genuinely have no idea as I’m not in that position obviously!)

@OneHanded After the accident, because I severed my sciatic nerve my leg was paralysed.
From the lower left hand side of my back, all the way down my left leg.
It was a huge struggle mentally and physically.

I was told initially that my life would be much better if I had my leg amputated, as having my whole leg paralysed, I wouldn't be able to walk.

Even though I knew deep down it would be better, not one part of me wanted to loose my leg. It didn't work, but it was me. I still loved my leg very much.
I made it very clear to all my consultants, that an amputation wasn't an option. I couldn't even hear the word.
I proved the consultants wrong in one way, and was extremely determined to walk again. I went for four hour sessions of physio, four times a week for three months. Eventually I was able to walk!

But then the problem arose which led to the amputation.

People subconsciously when standing move their feet around constantly, shifting weight from one foot to another.
I didn't do that. I could stand for hours and without realising (because I couldn't feel my foot) I was putting all my weight through my paralysed foot. This led to a pressure sore.

Due to the nerves not working, it wouldn't heal and just got deeper and deeper on my heel. I then contracted MRSA, Staph and Osteomyelitis . It was impossible to save.
I still wasn't ready to accept my fight was over.
I had to go into hospital on a drip of antibiotics for a week every 3 weeks for about 8 months.
The wound at this point was about five inches deep.
I had been walking one day and that evening, the district nurses came to change my dressing and without realising my heel bone had broken off and fell onto the floor (sorry for graphic details)
I was so use to feeling so ill, that I didn't realise I has sepsis. That night I got rushed in.

This was the point I knew my battle was over. The more the infection spread, the more of my leg I would loose. Plus all the infections were killing me.

The amputation got rid of all my infections and saved my life. So obviously to me an amputation and prosthetic is better.
I still have to be very careful. I still get pressure sores on my little leg (I have one now) it's a daily battle.
Any little cut can lead to an infection and me losing more of my leg.

Gosh I apologise for such a long message! Hope that answers the question..but that's my experience. Will your hand be paralysed for life?

Completely humbled to read your experience, how open you've been, and your attitude, thank you so much OP.

This is so interesting OP. Thanks for your openness and I wish you all the best of health and finding peace with your situation. You’re amazing.

HappinessIsKey was an above the knee amputation offered to you? Is this something you're going to have to consider in the future?

DH was told he could have above or below but if he had below, chances were he would have more problems in the future and would require further surgery to go above the knee. Because his problems were impacting on his heart and having a GA was already a risk to his heart, he went for above the knee so he didn't have to have further surgery.

Sorry, just realised that you've said further infections could lead to you losing more of your leg so you've already kind of answered that question about further surgery.

Op, your strength and good heartedness absolutely shine through all of your posts. You have experienced such trauma and ill health yet your humility and generosity of spirit have inspired a lot of people on this thread.
You have given me lots to think about tonight and this thread is helping me put a lot of things into perspective. Thank you for that. I think you absolutely do have a book in you. It could take the form of an extended letter to your old leg perhaps!

Your dc are very lucky to have such a mother.

I wish you nothing but good health and happiness and that the pressure sore on your little leg heals quickly.

Thankyou so so much for your openness and sharing! It’s really fascinating that you had such a chain of events leading up to the eventual amputation, I hope you don’t mind me saying so. My hand will be paralysed for life, and I’m lined up for a nerve transfer that’s been postponed as I opened my elbow back up about three months ago and it became infected and ate down to the plate and pin that is there - unfortunately now touch and go as to whether we beat said infection.
Honestly thank you so much for proving life goes on and you develop a new kind of normal!