I'm a traveller- AMA

[Pinkyyy]

I was actually asked on another post to start this thread, I've been debating the idea for a while but usually decide not to because I've seen threads like this turn sour before. Hopefully I can avoid that and actually provide information and educate people on a way of life they may well know very little about.

I invite you to ask any questions you may have, and I will do my best to answer them all honestly. I ask that you don't bother to comment if you're going to bombard me with racism and ignorance. If you'd like to question a common stereotype, by all means go ahead but I will not respond to those who are simply here to be hateful. I also hope you'll respect that I don't like to share too much of my personal details on here, so I'm aiming more to speak about travellers as a a whole and not so much about me personally.

So.... AMA

@5lnaBed have you actually read any of what I said? The word is not used with the intent to offend. I really don't understand why people are saying it is an offensive word.

Any word usually said with intent to offend is insulting

Rather ridiculous statement. Words have meanings, and these meanings are important. YOU choosing to be offended by something, or ascribing intent where it was not meant, is not the same as something actually being offensive.

I don't know why there is an assumption in lack of education.
Most travellers I know attend school, and if they leave earlier are no more disadvantaged than a child going all the way through in a bad state school.

My family has a senior council member, in charge of roads maintenance. We laughed as thought it stereotypical of tarmac layers, often attributed to travellers. He is married to a SW

There is also a Police officer, doing quite well, although as there are a couple of criminals in the family has had his own problems to contend with.

I've not heard of anyone being put off applying to uni, and as previously stated most girls I know have further education the same as gorger communities.

I use the word gorger to signify which group I am talking about. It really is not an offensive term, travellers don't use it as an offensive term about non travellers, that I know of.

As it said before, I for one have only ever heard that term used as an insult, to provoke and cause tension when the root of whatever fallout had nothing to do with a cultural difference. I know many travellers, I have no issue with any but it's undeniable that when the word 'gorja' is thrown with swearwords, the intent is obvious as language is ever-evolving, it is now considered disrespectful when used around anyone who isn't a traveller.
The argument about the root/origin of the word isn't really ok, because I could argue that any racist or offensive word in English is acceptable because its English and has non controversial origins (or any word in my mother tongue, not just English of course...any language).

@NottonightJosepheen but can you not understand how what you're saying sounds? You essentially said that because we generally have different ambitions to yours, we will always be outsiders

@BlancheM is any word used in a sentence alongside wear words, with the intent to offend, not going to cause feelings of disrespect? I'm not sure how many other ways I can explain this other than to say it is not an offensive word, I should know, I speak it regularly. With respect, unless you speak a language, you can't really define what it's words mean, more than someone who actually does

Nottonight

I don't think anyone is arguing that there are cultural reasons for what you are stating. But all communities have these problems.
My dd friend is a wizz at Maths, she goes to quite a good school. She should be taking the opportunity of extra classes a local college has links for exceptional students.Her parents won't let her go as she has to come home and take care of her sibling. They are encouraging hairdressing, or childcare. Nothing wrong with this, but what a waste.
She isn't on her own, I'm from a deprived area of the NW, mostly wc, and it's how a lot think. Uni, isn't for them, it's their culture.

I think what Pinkyyy is trying to say, and I am definitely, you get this in all communities, and I don't argue that travellers will represent a higher percentage.

Pinkyyy

Might be a difficult question, I'm not sure of your age.
The elders in my family 70/90 year olds, talk a lot about folklore and superstition. They tell all the younger ones to try to keep it for future generations.
Are there people in your family like this that maybe follow old superstitions.
Mine still won't allow anything touched by an animal into the house.
No pets, except for dogs, but these are mostly to guard/ do a job.
All feeding equipment has to be washed separately, preferably outside.

Yes, I nearly forgot. The toilet lid, I daren't ever leave it up, they screamed at me once, in words I didn't understand.
You can't let the bad spirits into the house, by leaving the lid up.

Ok. But way upthread you said you don't speak a different language or dialect, but in English. Another poster pointed out where certain words stem from as you weren't sure yourself.

@RomanyRoots there are quite a few superstitions, some of which you mentioned. Though I haven't heard the one about the toilet lid. A lot of it is to do with things being considered unlucky. There are certain words that superstition causes us not to say also, for example- we don't say the word 'cancer' and usually refer to it as 'thwt bad thing' or as 'the cover'

@BlancheM apologies, I thought it was obvious that I could speak English. As I've said I'm not an expert on history or roots, and that extends to the language. Not many travellers research the history and origins of being a traveller really

I'm not sure what you mean. One minute you say you don't speak another language, then you tell me I can't don't understand a word because I don't speak that language (which you don't either). Clearly you speak English, as does everyone on this thread.
I find it unusual that you don't know much about the culture as I know so much about mine and am proud enough to look into it at length.

Understanding the language is really academic. I have seen the sheer content and very nearly enrolled for a 2 hour lecture per week, but just missed the last year it was offered. romani.humanities.manchester.ac.uk/

There are a lot of youtube videos of language, websites if you google.
The above just gave me an idea.

@BlancheM I said earlier that I speak travellers language. I am very proud of my culture but haven't felt the need to research every last bit of it, I don't think that's uncommon. I feel as though you're questioning whether or not I actually am a traveller now, I do hope that's not the case as it would be quite ridiculous given the amount of information I've shared on this thread. I haven't claimed to be an expert, I've simply said I'm an everyday traveller and I'll do my best to answer what people wanted to know

Hello Pinkyyy, great thread, one of my best friends of over 30 years is a traveller. She’s kind and generous also feisty. She married a Gorger and her mum was not pleased at all but that was a long time ago, our children were at school together and remain great friends. She would like her to marry in as she says, but no chance of it happening. Knowing her for as long as I have I can regocise another traveller. She and her husband have made a fabulous life for themselves and lead a good life. Several houses dotted around the world to which I make good use of. A really lovely friend.

@Coconutty yes monkeys are unlucky in most families I believe. As are rats, which are referred to as 'varmint'

@Redland12 thank you! I think your friend is a great example of the fact that traveller women do have rights and they are not forced to do anything, they are free to do as they please and although it was probably a bit of a shock to begin with, I don't doubt her family support her all the same

Her parents won't let her go as she has to come home and take care of her sibling. They are encouraging hairdressing, or childcare. Nothing wrong with this, but what a waste

But that doesn't just apply to the travelling community, a lot of people think like this. My DD's first boyfriend was a bright boy, not exceptionally so, but definitely university material. His parents weren't open to anything like Uni, even though they were reasonably comfortably off. The school encouraged him, my DD (his gf did), he was desperate to go to Uni but his parents said it was a waste of money and time and wouldn't support him (and this was before it went up to £9K)

Needless to say he didn't go.

I just think it's a great shame when parents don't encourage their children to reach their full potential education wise, whether that be the traveller community or otherwise.

RomanyRoots I worded my post wrong, I'm agreeing with you, there's lots of people out there who don't think further education is worth it, even when they've got a bright child.