My OH earns millions AMA

[scumbagmillionaire]

Just that really. I'm a SAHM. He's earned over a million pounds for the last few years. 7 last year probs not as much this year. Presume I will get a lot of abuse but do think that there are a lot of misconceptions as to.how much money it really is after tax and what sort of person you are so....

Why should she, @silvercatowner? Her wealth is due to her husband's hard work. She didn't win the lottery.

Her wealth is due to her husband's hard work

Bollocks. Poor people don't work hard enough then? Is that where they've gone wrong? So was it down to hard work that her husband had the good fortune to inherit a good set of genes, intelligence, good health, supportive family, inheritance, in the right place at the right time etc etc??

We are all a hairs breadth away from the streets. There but for the grace of god and all that.

You're right silvercatowner but neither have we inherited anything or had a leg up any other way so we wouldn't be here without it. The family comments are the only ones annoying me. No one knows anything about my family, our relationship, their standard of living. The charity thing I have owned up to and will do something about.

Does your husband enjoy his job?
How stressed does he get?

So true @Silvercatowner

So true.

We are all where we are by freak of genetics, that's those of us who are there personally, not because of someone else taking us along for the ride.

Who works harder, who do I have more respect for, who is stronger professionally and who deserved to be paid more, my colleagues or the lady who cleans their office. I would be downright ashamed of myself if I didn't truly believe scream out loud that it's the lady.

We are all, every one of, one tumour, one accident, one loss, one illness, one twist of fate aw ay from living on the streets, with nothing and the lack of material things being the last of our problems.

I've been severely battered around in my life, as I said, the trader part is the least dramatic part of my story and there are no truer words to describe my fortunate, painful, glorious, emotional, overwhelming, confusing and fragile life that exactly what you say.

But for the Grace of God go I.

There's a name for my AMA.....

I guess what irks me here is that the OP's achievement, or special AMA characteristic is in being married to someone who makes lots of money.
I guess the question to ask her is 'how did you get him to propose' but I don't want really want to go to that level.
Here's one. 'If he lost everything, Say was convicted of insider trading, would you still love him?'

@RealMaryMagdalene 😍😍😍

Can you send me a cheque?

Seriously though, how do you value material goods if you can just buy what very you want whenever you want ?

Why should the OP have to justify not working? My DH doesn't earn millions , but is a high earner. I'm not bothered about working either and never really was, although I did until DD was born and would if I really had to. different strokes and all that.

OP you say your home costs a fortune to run..how big is it? Unless it's like a stately home or something,(which it might be I suppose!) how is that possible?

Do you feel any guilt that your wealth is down to pure luck and that others who are less lucky are sleeping on the streets?

You could ask the same of someone earning £20k a year. They are still hugely better off than many people. What do you suggest? Anyone earning over a livable wage donate the rest to charity?

Do you think there's a certain mindset that goes with being wealthy? If so, how is it different to being relatively poor? Or, did you always have a wealthy mindset? Please can you expand on this? Thanks.

Op. What's the most expensive gift you've bought?

I don't see why the family comments should annoy you. We don't have to know anything about them to wonder why you wouldn't help them out. You don't have to go into detail, but to me it's a perfectly logical question to someone who's come on here to talk about their millionaire lifestyle.

@realmarymagdelane - deep respect to you. As an IB myself, I came in this thread in despair at the headline, intending to post my own response to OP. You said it all so more eloquently and with far less vitriol than I could have managed in a month of sundays.

No points to add to this thread really, other than to point out that life is not a read-through; each day, week, month is there to fill as best you can. The more of life you experience the more you realise that cash is great for catching shit and dealing with shit quickly (the lump in the breast, the bullied aspie kid who can’t face school), but it isn’t cash that gives you joy, it is time with friends, family, time to kick back, to nurture, to appreciate being loved. To spend at the charity (getting back from that charity 10 times what you put in) to explore the world, to catch what’s in your kids’ heads before they slip through your fingers. Cash is fucking great, sure, but ‘indulgent’ time that you use wisely; that’s the really precious stuff.

@SandAndSea......I'm so sorry but the wealthy mindset question is the most daft I've ever heard! Some people have a natural entrepreneurial mindset from a young age for sure, those people are amazing. Many people do gravitate towards (suck up) to wealthy people for no reason than they enjoy the association and see spin offs coming their way. I suppose you'd call a woman with few acheivments of her own like this a gold digger. Most of the wealthy people I know have been very mobile in their post education lives (prepared to upsticks), taken bigger personal risks than many others and worked around the clock when they were building their careers. They're also likeable and secured strong sponsors as they've climbed the ladder.

Sorry but why is this OP getting grief, but not the Footballer’s wife OP?

Both seem to be perfectly nice women, but obviously some sorts of wealth are more acceptable than others.

Also, everyone is being very hypocritical about it’s the OPs husbands money. In every other thread with normal incomes; it’s family money.
OP is a sahm by choice. Stop being so goady, hypocritical & sanctimonious as a cover for jealousy.

I also don’t know why the OP is getting a hard time, although I think the hedge fund posts are valid and useful.

Something that really shocked me a while ago was watching a documentary on YouTube about an old lady who lived in Appalachia and the poverty there. They mentioned that there are charities, but that the charities themselves are so poor that they resort to making and selling moonshine, which is illegal! Just to make a few dollars to help other people. That's all it takes - a few dollars here and there. And yet there are people in America who could easily provide that old lady with a couple of hundred dollars a month for the rest of her life and who would not even notice the money gone.

I was, and am, disgusted.

I dont give money to charity. I don’t feel the slightest bit guilty (actually lie- small DD to air ambulance) why should it be any different when you have more?

OP met her husband when they were working and earning similar. So dont think she set out to snag a rich man so she could sit on her arse for the rest of her life.
Anyone saying they would not spend their wages as they saw fit is lying. If I earn a million I would spend a million. It would afford me better class flights, nicer hotels on holidays, further away more exotic locations. It would also afford private school and private health. Why should she give it up. She can afford to fix the problem a lot quicker than NHS. Plus isn't it better that she leaves the NHS fir people who can't afford private.
Why should OP feel guilty for what she has and that others don't have it. Her husband qualified in high salaried career. That takes years of study, plus lots of hours. He has made sacrifices to get to where he is. Good for him. He has got to where he wants that does not mean he looks down on anyone else. It means he appreciates the luxuries and comforts HE can afford. Why shouldn't he?
I think people who are making negative comments arejealous types who always blame others for their misfortunes. People that achieve focus on the end goal and how to get there. Not on the issues and challenges that hold them back.

Get over the lack of giving to charity. It's a personal choice. I have stopped donating to charity, apart from donating old clothes, and try to make differences to people I know. That charity is far better in my opinion. Don't make others feel bad because they decide to help others in different ways to you.

Do you have any kind of budget for thing?
So food shopping for example? Or birthday presents for the kids? Or clothing allowance? Or do you just buy whatever without questioning the cost?

but obviously some sorts of wealth are more acceptable than others.

Of course! What about drug barons, arms dealers & oligarchs?

Or landlords who stuff a dozen illegal immigrants into a hovel?

there are a lot of misconceptions as to.how much money it really is after tax

So how much does your OH take home each year if he earns a million? What tax does he pay?