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AMA

My OH earns millions AMA

314 replies

scumbagmillionaire · 17/07/2018 08:48

Just that really. I'm a SAHM. He's earned over a million pounds for the last few years. 7 last year probs not as much this year. Presume I will get a lot of abuse but do think that there are a lot of misconceptions as to.how much money it really is after tax and what sort of person you are so....

OP posts:
scumbagmillionaire · 17/07/2018 10:10

I go to the gym. Wallk all the dogs. Shop. Cook. Have spent a lot of time doing the house up

OP posts:
TEDx · 17/07/2018 10:12

How did your OH get into this line of work. How did he progress? What did he study at uni?

thecatsthecats · 17/07/2018 10:13

What makes your hsband want to keep going in to work?

I know sure as hell if I could put by enough to be free of work in the traditional sense, I'd do it and be out of the door.

(by which I mean if I could acquire, say, £3 million by saving - very easy if I stuck to my current lifestyle and earned millions! - I would do so, stick enough away for a sturdy pension, buy a property or two outright, and only work exactly what I wanted to do - volunteering, writing etc)

DeckSofa · 17/07/2018 10:15

I didn't comment on whether the OP is virtuous. I just don't like to see everyone piling on to tell her she isn't generous enough, and why can't she be more like them? I stand by saying she's relatively modest, because she hasn't claimed to be generous, unlike the immodest boasts from some about how charitable they are, designed to guilt-trip the OP.

Susanmartha · 17/07/2018 10:16

Ajandjjmum

Sorry I don't know how to quote on this forum so hope you find this.

I'm not sure how I feel, I certainly have no jealousy over money side of things ( I guess I should say I'm a carer on a low income but feel this is neither here or there) It's more that my sis and family don't visit us, we go to their lovely home and take elderly Mum with us - and that doesn't happen all that often- but it is what it is, maybe we would all have drifted apart despite the money differences, I'm not sure.

00100001 · 17/07/2018 10:17

Why don't you have a job OP?

IfYouDontImagineNothingHappens · 17/07/2018 10:17

What's family time like? Is he home enough to enjoy the nice things?

GorgonLondon · 17/07/2018 10:17

Neither I nor other posters are 'boasting' , Deck. We're pointing out that most normal people do make an effort to give to charity, to whatever extent we can given our own finances,, and backing up this claim with information from our own lives.

I'd still like to know how the op justifies being 'tight' and not giving to charity. That's not being 'modest' , it's mean, selfish and deeply uncaring.

Mia85 · 17/07/2018 10:18

If the whole point is early retirement, why haven't you done it already? Surely with the assets that you have, the amount he has been earning and his experience of investing you would be able to buy a nice home somewhere and fund a comfortable life somewhere pleasant with a huge amount of freedom.

krustykittens · 17/07/2018 10:20

Despite the large sums of money your OH earns, you sound like you have huge outgoings. Does this worry you? Are you ever tempted to cut back in some ways or will this wait until he retires?

HollowTalk · 17/07/2018 10:20

OP, if you discovered your husband was unfaithful, would you be more likely to stay with him (if that's what he wanted, too) because you wouldn't want a lower standard of living? (No judgement if that's the case - a lot of women stay for that reason.)

towbar · 17/07/2018 10:22

Do you feel his salary is justified?

ApolloandDaphne · 17/07/2018 10:24

I think OP is getting a hard time about the charity thing. As i said upthread my DH is a high earner too. We don't really give much to charity in terms of money. However my DH is the chair of the board of a local charitable trust and gives a lot of his (very precious) spare time to this. I also do voluntary work locally. We prefer the personal interactions through doing these things rather than giving money to faceless charities. It is easy to set up a SO or DD and feel smug about it. Much harder but more worthwhile to get stuck in at the coalface and actually do the work!

Littlechocola · 17/07/2018 10:25

Would you like to work?

GorgonLondon · 17/07/2018 10:27

We don't really give much to charity in terms of money. However my DH is the chair of the board of a local charitable trust and gives a lot of his (very precious) spare time to this. I also do voluntary work locally. We prefer the personal interactions through doing these things rather than giving money to faceless charities. It is easy to set up a SO or DD and feel smug about it. Much harder but more worthwhile to get stuck in at the coalface and actually do the work!

a) You can do both - give time and money. Many people who are not wealthy do this.

b) We don't feel 'smug' - that's generally a word used by those who don't give anything to charity to insult those who do.

c) Nothing 'faceless' about the two charities we give most of our time and money to.

One is the local hospice - we go in personally, we donate time to their events, we give them regular financial donations and lots of stuff to their charity shops.

The other is a very small charity working with a group of Maasai in Kenya, run by a family in Devon who travel out there regularly. We know the two individual children that we are sponsoring to go to school - they are the same ages/sexes as my children. They exchange drawings, photos and letters with my kids.

If you are very wealthy and don't give money to charity, you are in the wrong. Calling other people 'boasting' or 'smug' doesn't hide that as well as you think it does.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 17/07/2018 10:30

Um I'm not trying to boast on the charity thing, just trying to point out that it is all relative. OP could give £10k a year but feel it's not very much due to her income.

It's possible to volunteer and set up a DD you can feel smug about Apollo. It's not an either/or thing you know.

Tinkobell · 17/07/2018 10:36

I see my own situation as from hardwork, luck and for the grace of god. That's why we do charity. Nothing's for ever. You come in with nothing and you leave with nothing. do you spend and wear a lot of blingy stuff OP? I don't like that.

Verbena37 · 17/07/2018 10:37

What really cheap products do you buy that, no matter how much money you have, you wouldn’t replace with more expensive items?

Verbena37 · 17/07/2018 10:38

E.g. you buy Nivea Soft rather than a really expensive all singing all dancing face cream.

JuneMyNameIsJune · 17/07/2018 10:44

How does your husband feel about the immorality of what he does? Your 7 million comes off the back of other peoples losses. I'm thinking of Carillion as an example here; the hedge funds short selling it relentlessly into the ground and many small investors and pension funds suffering complete losses. That's before all the job losses. Dirty money for a nice life.

tillytillytilly2018 · 17/07/2018 10:51

JuneMyNameIsJune I’m not sure you can comment on this if you don’t know the details of his work...

AdoraBell · 17/07/2018 10:51

Do you have a solid back up plan for if/when his job disappears?

Tinkobell · 17/07/2018 10:52

how've you both voted historically and in last election? Where d'you stand on brexit - leaver or remainer?

Tomboytown · 17/07/2018 10:52

How big is your house? How many beds?
Do you have swimming pool,cinema etc

jazzyfizzles · 17/07/2018 10:53

Have you ever worked, and if so do you miss it

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