So maybe that is the way to go - a two (or many) pronged approach: loud absolutists, and the generalists plugging away case by case, piece by piece. One lot are certaininly raising attention and the others are slowly getting precedent put in place.
I think this is absolutely the way to go, and the absolutists and the generalists need to see each other as mutually supportive and heading towards the same goal, rather than sniping at and undermining each other.
The court cases and draft guidance were absolutely essential for our group when challenging our school's policies. The PSHE teacher was a nice lady (very "be kind") who had been completely indoctrinated at conferences and by PSHE Association materials, and had basically carried the rest of the school along with her until we were able to say no, look, this is not settled law and policy. That made the head and deputy head sit up and take notice - before that they had just trusted that they'd hired an expert who was well trained and qualified.
For schools, the inspectorate needs to get involved. Schools are terrified of Ofsted/ISI and their policies not being in line with what the inspectors want to see, so they're the ones that need to scrutinise policies and safeguarding to make sure schools have not gone far beyond their remit. I would like to see an immediate safeguarding flag on any Ofsted inspection if the school has a policy saying they won't tell parents if a child requests a new name or pronouns at school, for example.