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Original poster

A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2

988 replies

Boiledbeetle · 29/05/2023 23:25

Thread 1:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/4776556-a-mumsnet-thread-about-a-book-about-a-mumsnet-thread-under-the-duvet-of-darkness-written-by-the-women-of-mumsnet?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=share

You do not need to have read thread 1 – this is not that sort of thread.

But to recap… Over Christmas and New Year after the passing of the GRR (Scotland) Bill a thread was started with a poem about Nicola Sturgeon. Eventually on that thread (and a couple of other threads) over 80 poems were written.

“Under the Duvet of Darkness: Poems written by angry women for angry women because WOMEN WON’T WHEESHT” was published as a paperback on 31st March 2023.

Available on Amazon only: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0C129WKDD

In a rather bizarre turn of events at one point it reached No 2 in poetry best sellers and No 5 in Feminist Criticism best sellers. No one will be surprised to discover that a book that is in the main about people, especially men, claiming to be something they are not was kept off the No1 spot in poetry best sellers by a crime novel, identifying as poetry, written by a man ;-)

E-BOOK:

Some people wanted an e-book rather than a paperback, but for that we needed someone who could actually make an e-book and some extra poems.

FairyKindleMother came to the rescue with regards the e-book and posters wrote enough poems that we could add 20 more poems into the e-book.

I pressed publish on the e-book a few hours ago. It can take usually up to 3 days to appear and populate all the info etc on the various sites, and there is always the chance they knock it back for some reason. But I've done all I can do at this point. We just have to wait and see who spots it on sale first! It will appear on the Amazon link above hopefully soon, (or I'll get an email asking me to change something).

MONEY FROM SALES OF ALL FORMATS:

In honour of Magdalen Berns, who co-founded the Scottish campaign group For Women Scotland, 100% of the profit from the sale of this book will be donated to For Women Scotland.

“It’s not hate to defend your rights, and it’s not hate to speak the truth.”
Magdalen Berns (1983 – 2019)

As I started work on the e-book posters continued to write poems. So we had a choice: leave them there, languishing on the thread, unloved, forgotten, never to have their words uttered again OR we could just do volume 2.

Posters voted for Volume 2 but we still need more poems!

And that’s the gist of thread 1.

A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
OP posts:
Thread gallery
190
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 09/06/2023 11:56

A COCKEREL IN THE HEN HOUSE

The sun shines through the crack in the curtains.

There was a time
I’d have leapt from the bed,
Pulled the curtains wide,
Stood with the sun on my body.
I’d have opened the window
Waved hello to a neighbour down below
I’d have then started on my day
A pee, a shit, shower, hair and teeth
I’d have stood before an open wardrobe
Picking my outfit for the day
Maybe tried on a few,
Then tossed them to the side
Before settling on my choice
I’d have sung along to the radio,
Despite being out of tune
And whispered sweet nothings to the purring cat
Waiting for me to go down and feed him.
I’d have navigated hungry cat on my way down the stairs
Then leisurely fed him, then me,
Then gone about my day.
But today
I lie here waiting, with this constant fear
I hope with all my might
This won’t be the day
Where I wish I could fight,
That I could move,
That I could yell out loud for help
Will the woman they have sent be the woman I expect
Or will they send a male one as I’m not worthy of respect.
Will they put my rights above a man’s internal feelings
Or will they put my life in jeopardy just to validate him.

The sun shines through the crack in the curtains.

OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 09/06/2023 00:06

@Brokendaughter I actually am feeling rather emotional after reading the last one x

OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 09/06/2023 00:02

I don't know what you were supposed to be doing this evening, but I'm glad you decided to write poems instead 😍

Well Done Applause GIF
OP posts:
Brokendaughter · 08/06/2023 23:48

Last one.
Now I have to go & do some actual work instead of using all my index cards up on this stuff.

The Sparking Path.

There is a sparking path, where only women walk.
No matter what preventions are in place,
Without regard for science saying so.
A furled up bud of hope; all women hold within
Entire civilisations of potential
That only women know.

There is a rock strewn cliff, that only women climb
To fall on the dual edged blade of grief/relief
When blooded proof unfurls
Or bloodless pause insists
Denotes a gift, denies a dream, depicts a fear, demands a choice
That only women make.

There is a storm wracked mountain, that only women scale,
Rippling, tear shuddering peaks as life in full bloom prevails
Summits of pain that cannot be remembered in it’s all.
Of ravines screaming to the edge of death
Or sometimes past that point, fate swept away
As only women are.

There is a tumbled moorland, that only women trek,
Mired in misogyny laced with lies
Revealed in the mists as women forge ahead.
Bitter, weed choked revelation that our equality is false
Which only women learn.

There is a roaring waterfall, then rapids only women navigate.
To forge from fecund to the other side
Overblown petals now, our time is passed
To spark new generations
As only women can.

There is a placid lake, where only women sail,
Sweet fading blossoms dressed with greying heads.
Smile lines or frowns carve flexing, fading arcs
Those fecund days of youth now past
Angered, freed to defend those future sparks
As only women fight.

On all these paths, we women pass each other by,
As time and circumstances lead us through trials and trails
We travel up and down as time ticks by
Weaving our ways as maiden, mother, crone
Until days take us all to the quiet eddies at lakes edge.
Where only women sit.

And in the eddies, at the end where women meet
As buds & blossoms treasured on the wind,
We scent the future with our passing tracks
Become memories of the beings that began.
As only women may.

No man can ever tread the sparking paths
They cannot know just
What a woman is
Or learn humility enough to ask.
They never feel the footing change in life
The what of we remains beyond their grasp.

Brokendaughter · 08/06/2023 23:39

'Tween Spring
And fall
Bad poets all
Let's unload in the forum.

Where women speak
Outraged trolls squeak
But Vipers just ignore 'em.

Meant to post this first (& I'm only talking about me when I say all, but all rhymed)

Brokendaughter · 08/06/2023 23:38

sorry about this... there may be more, it's been an inspiring evening.

The Basement Boys.

The Basement boys are out in force
Wearing their ninja suits (of course)
Anime avatars left at home
Flocking to a cause they can call their own

In bitter eyes you see the longing
For a sense of true belonging
They do not care for trans or queer
Just an excuse to be right here

Where they display their strangled hate
For women who they cannot date
Who shy away from sad & greasy
Feeling just a little queasy

They game alone at home each night
Or fantasise, then come to fight
Real live women with real lives
Wishing they could photograph some Readers Wives

But they're not here for a real punch up.
Getting hit back would bring their lunch up
They would never dare to pick
On anybody born with an actual dick

It's women they long to disempower
To damage, demean, devoice & deflower
When they get older they'll probably give up
Settle down with a pint & watch the World Cup.

For now, they saw the signs & flocked online
To bully women in their spare time.

Sign up here for the TQ+ party!!!
Scream at women risk free, me hearty!

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 22:02

More so that I can get it out of my head rather than it being a poem with any merit...

NOT VERY CHARITABLE

Oh, Oxfam! What have you done?
You’ve pissed off women. And then some!
You have fallen for the gender woo,
Your profits flushed right down the loo,
Along with your reputation.
And the trust and respect of a nation.

Cant get these two lines to work yet but i'll stick them here in case I get the urge to fiddle with this one at a later date:

Pandering to those who try to silence us
So take your stinking video and shove it up your tush

anyway moving on to a charity that is worthy of respect:

We've sold 48 copies so far this month (7 today) and are currently at:

387 copies sold and £982.78 raised for For Women Scotland in total since we started.

A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 15:19

ChristinaXYZ · 08/06/2023 14:50

Nearly a grand raised! That's amazing work Boiled!@Boiledbeetle

Currently at £970.28 getting closer slowly.

OP posts:
ChristinaXYZ · 08/06/2023 14:50

Nearly a grand raised! That's amazing work Boiled!@Boiledbeetle

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 14:29

Waitwhat23 · 08/06/2023 13:12

Arse. The bolds didn't work.

Nice.😺

I can see bold pride and shame

OP posts:
Waitwhat23 · 08/06/2023 13:12

Arse. The bolds didn't work.

Waitwhat23 · 08/06/2023 13:12

Pauline McNeil with
Regan, Forstater, Cunningham, Foran and Joyce.
Initiated a conversation for women to have a voice.
Dared to organise in the Holy Month of Pride.
Expecting acceptance of plurality, from TRA's?, that'll be right!
**?

Scottish Labour betrays every single Scottish woman,
Holyrood should hang it's fawning head in shame
A despicable shower of bastards, each and every one of them,
Men subjugating women time and time again.
Expecting a fucking apology, not a chance, with much disdain.

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 11:29

Piccalillipromises · 08/06/2023 11:19

No idea if it's any good or not but here's a silly poem I wrote before I'd found mn...

Billy Goat's Bluff

On Monday Billy was a dog.
He barked and barked all day.
He barked until his voice wore out,
Then howled the night away.

On Tuesday Billy was a cat,
He slept and purred and pounced.
He chased a dot around a bit,
Licked himself and flounced.

On Wednesday Billy was a goat,
He ate everything in sight.
He even ate a set of keys,
And gave his mum a fright.

On Thursday Billy was a chicken,
He dug up several worms.
He tried so hard to lay an egg,
His bottom really burns.

On Friday Billy was a girl,
And now he's in for surgery.
The problem this time, my friends;
His mother took him seriously!

Oh I really really like that 😀

Thank you! 💐

Sticks it in my pocket for volume 2.

I'm loving all these new poems!

OP posts:
TheBiologyStupid · 08/06/2023 11:29

Excellent, @Piccalillipromises ! A Cautionary Tale for our times.

Piccalillipromises · 08/06/2023 11:19

No idea if it's any good or not but here's a silly poem I wrote before I'd found mn...

Billy Goat's Bluff

On Monday Billy was a dog.
He barked and barked all day.
He barked until his voice wore out,
Then howled the night away.

On Tuesday Billy was a cat,
He slept and purred and pounced.
He chased a dot around a bit,
Licked himself and flounced.

On Wednesday Billy was a goat,
He ate everything in sight.
He even ate a set of keys,
And gave his mum a fright.

On Thursday Billy was a chicken,
He dug up several worms.
He tried so hard to lay an egg,
His bottom really burns.

On Friday Billy was a girl,
And now he's in for surgery.
The problem this time, my friends;
His mother took him seriously!

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 11:05

Emily Wilding Davison died 110 years ago today

Emily Wilding Davison (11 October 1872 – 8 June 1913) was an English suffragette who fought for votes for women in Britain in the early twentieth century. A member of the Women's Social and Political Union (WSPU) and a militant fighter for her cause, she was arrested on nine occasions, went on hunger strike seven times and was force-fed on forty-nine occasions. She died after being hit by King George V's horse Anmer at the 1913 Derby when she walked onto the track during the race.

A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 10:19

LilacpointMummy · 08/06/2023 09:20

I love it!

Show quote history

😁 obviously no particular person was in mind when writing this 😁

And it's fitting that a poem called incorrect had a spelling mistake!

Misled not mislead!

OP posts:
LilacpointMummy · 08/06/2023 09:20

Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 07:52

INCORRECT

There once was an old man called Fred
Who larped as a woman instead
He bought dresses and tights
Thought that gave him rights
I’m afraid he was totally mislead.

I love it!

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 07:52

INCORRECT

There once was an old man called Fred
Who larped as a woman instead
He bought dresses and tights
Thought that gave him rights
I’m afraid he was totally mislead.

OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 06:41

Or even HELL and damnation. It's too early for this beetle.

OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 06:40

Oh help and damnation .Why did I never consider this could happen?

What happens when you've sold 1 e-book and 1 paperback since the day started?

A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
OP posts:
Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 08/06/2023 01:06

TheBiologyStupid · 08/06/2023 00:57

Excellent, well done Boiled (and FairyKindleMother)!

All those copies out there on bookshelves and now kindles... About a mumsnet thread!

Laughs hysterically.

Mad the world has gone mad!

I will admit in my house there's a copy in the library (ok dining room with bookshelves) the guest quarters (box room that the cats sleep in) and most importantly there's one in the bathroom mainly as the cover matches the colour scheme! And a copy on my tablet.

But the rest are in other peoples houses 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

OP posts:
TheBiologyStupid · 08/06/2023 00:57

Excellent, well done Boiled (and FairyKindleMother)!

Original poster
Boiledbeetle · 07/06/2023 23:45

I'm off to bed but thought you might like to see some total totals. Since we started we have sold 380 books and raised £963.62.

A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
A Mumsnet thread about a book about a Mumsnet thread “Under the Duvet of Darkness” written by the women of Mumsnet THREAD 2
OP posts:
Ourladycheesusedatum · 07/06/2023 21:57

Brokendaughter · 07/06/2023 07:53

I don't want to wear a bum bag
Brace for a back pack
Shoulder a shopper.

I want hands clutch free.
No elbow crooking walk
With purse suits me

And I'm not a walking billboard
Take your logos back from me.

You can keep your quilted, buckled, studded, zippered, poppered bags.

Give me oh so many pockets,
Sized for phones or cards or keys.
Maybe one to pop a lip balm in
(Plus an insulated chocolate pocket
For emergencies.)

Pockets I can put my hand in
All the way up to my wrist,
Pockets deep enough to curl my fingers up
Into an actual fist.

Don't give me shallow, tiny pockets
Sized just right for nothing much.
I want to root round in my pockets,
Full of pencils or some such.

I want to load my pockets up & go
Out for the day bag free

Because my stuff fits in my pockets
No substitutes for me.

All the boy clothes have big pockets
That the girl clothes seem to lack
So if you'd like to get my money
Put the girl clothes pockets back.

I adore this. I'm going to buy the next book solely for this poem.