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Original poster

Please can we have someone really sensible on to do a webchat about smoking in pregnancy?

66 replies

PencilsInSpace · 19/07/2017 21:22

In light of yesterday's report by ASH on smoking in pregnancy, and in light of the current thread on smoking in pregnancy with all its usual horrible responses, which are likely to drive pregnant smokers elsewhere and lead them to conclude that MN is not a place to seek support:

Please can we have someone really sensible on to do a webchat about smoking in pregnancy?

I'm sure ASH could suggest someone who can do a webchat. The main conclusion of their report is exactly the same as the issue that comes up on any thread here about smoking in pregnancy - everybody's great at rattling off the risks. Most people are totally shit at effectively communicating with PG smokers and supporting them to quit.

10% of women are still smoking at the time of delivery. That's at least 10% of pregnant women MN is letting down, because I wouldn't come here if I needed support, would you?

This is crap isn't it? Please can we do something to change the culture a little bit? It has to be OK for women who are pregnant and who smoke to ask for support.

OP posts:
MNHQ
LornaMumsnet · 12/09/2017 10:52

[quote PencilsInSpace]@MNHQ there's another thread today. Pregnant women who smoke are being referred to as 'selfish cunts', 'fucking disgusting' and 'the pits'. They are being told that if they can't quit they 'shouldn't even have a baby'.

Please please please can you help change MN culture around this issue? One in ten is rather a lot of pg women we're letting down. Has there been any progress yet with the webchat request?[/quote]

Hello!

Afraid we're still waiting for an update on this one but will let you know as soon as we know more.

In the meantime, we'll pop over to the thread and remove any posts that break our talk guidelines.

Flowers
Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 11/09/2017 20:29

@MNHQ there's another thread today. Pregnant women who smoke are being referred to as 'selfish cunts', 'fucking disgusting' and 'the pits'. They are being told that if they can't quit they 'shouldn't even have a baby'.

Please please please can you help change MN culture around this issue? One in ten is rather a lot of pg women we're letting down. Has there been any progress yet with the webchat request?

OP posts:
lljkk · 14/08/2017 11:33

MN fora are not supportive for lots and lots and lots of things.

Neverknowing · 14/08/2017 11:17

I think we really need to stop the stigma as it's not helping at all.
A close friend of mine smoked during pregnancy and lied to her midwife and other health professionals as she knew they would judge. If the stigma wasn't there she could have got the help she needed to quit? She still smokes now, albeit only 2 a day now when baby is asleep, but she could have received help. Your stigma and anger really isn't helping anyone tbh.

LuckyFraud · 14/08/2017 11:07

So you do exist then? Read the thread at all ?

LuckyFraud · 14/08/2017 11:07

Record time @MNHQ well done

LuckyFraud · 14/08/2017 11:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

JanetLeCarre · 14/08/2017 10:54

What else sensible is there to say apart from "Don't smoke in pregnancy"?

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 13/08/2017 21:23

Thank you Beyond. Any news yet MNHQ?

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BeyondQueenOfLists · 13/08/2017 16:43

Bumping to add my support for this :)

Polter · 07/08/2017 20:37

I am really pleased MNHQ have got back to you and look forward to seeing a webchat/Q&A.

The fact that hardly any of the 1 in 10 have posted on this or other threads about smoking in pregnancy is very telling.

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 07/08/2017 19:41

The thing is, Fluffy, you say 'there should be a stigma attached to it' as if there isn't already a MASSIVE amount of stigma attached to smoking in pregnancy. There is in fact so much stigma now that it's putting women off seeking the help they need to quit.

This is happening on MN too and it's a massive failure for a parenting site. Too many times I've seen threads started, often by quite vulnerable women, seeking help and support to quit in pregnancy and they are hounded off here. They are told they are filthy disgusting selfish arseholes who don't deserve to have children or are unfit to have children.

How do you imagine this is helping?

If stigma is such a brilliant approach to this problem can you explain why such a high number of women continue to smoke in pg?

OP posts:
Fluffypinkpyjamas · 07/08/2017 19:12

Yeah whatever pencils

Happy to help Grin

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 07/08/2017 18:48

^^ an example of the problem.

Thanks for the bump though, Fluffy Smile

OP posts:
Fluffypinkpyjamas · 07/08/2017 18:47

It's disgusting so yes, there should be a stigma attached to it I agree howto

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 07/08/2017 18:45

Thanks Polter, and three cheers for non-judgmental and pragmatic midwives everywhere!

MNHQ have got back to me and have said they will chase this up SmileGinFlowers

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Polter · 07/08/2017 08:44

Excellent idea Plenty, and one I'd fully support as someone who wasn't able to stop during pregnancy, but was able to cut down dramatically with the support of a wonderful non-judgmental and very pragmatic midwife.

Ollivander84 · 06/08/2017 20:54

Pictures on the pack, advertising, plain packs... none of that made a blind bit of difference to me because I was addicted
It's like sticking a picture of a dead person on heroin and titling it "you might die if you take this"
They know that, but the addiction pull is so powerful you don't think about it, or your desire to smoke overwhelms it
I smoked from 12 to 32 and not once in those years did I contemplate giving up. Even when the photos went on, even when the price went up, even when they put the doors on cigarette kiosks

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 06/08/2017 20:47

But don't you think that there SHOULD be a stigma around some things?

Not where it doesn't help, no. Especially not if it's counterproductive.

I don't know what you mean by 'smiley friendly support'. Do you mean the sort of support provided by SSS? They have a relatively good success rate. Over 90% of all quit attempts end in failure so I'm completely in favour of smiley friendly support and I think SSS do a bloody good job on the whole.

How would your philosophy work with, for e.g. weight loss? Do you think WW would be more successful if they shamed everyone who came through the door and called them a disgusting fatty? What about overweight PG women? That carries significant health risks for mother and child. Should we stigmatise and shame them?

I'm not going into the smoking rates again here, and what's influenced them. I've posted about it today on this thread. None of the things you have mentioned have had that much of an effect.

OP posts:
Thurlow · 06/08/2017 20:41

But we are now in a position where everyone knows how bad smoking is. There isn't a smoker in the country who doesn't know that it is bad for them, and there isn't a pregnant smoker in the ciuntey who doesn't know that there is a high risk of causing issues for the baby.

Therefore anyone who struggles to quit while pregnant (or who doesn't try to) clearly has other issues in place, such as stress, depression etc.

So clearly a different approach is needed than simply saying "it's bad".

Howwwtohelp · 06/08/2017 20:27

Smoking rates in general weren't drastically lowered just by throwing money at smiley friendly support.
They were lowered because of the stigma around smoking - pictures on the packs, no advertising, plain packs, reduced smoking in the media.

It's not 'cool' anymore; it has a stigma attached to it - so less people do it.

Howwwtohelp · 06/08/2017 20:24

But don't you think that there SHOULD be a stigma around some things? Genuinely?

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 06/08/2017 20:02

So how do we lower the 1 in 10 figure, Howww? ASH clearly think there is more to be done wrt staff training.

If a webchat helps break the stigma and makes it more OK for women to seek support I think that would be a good thing and I can't see what harm it could do.

If it goes a tiny way towards changing the culture on here then MN might not let so many women down who need support to quit.

Have you shared your funny views of support with Stop Smoking Services? Should they all just pack up shop because people should know better?

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Howwwtohelp · 06/08/2017 19:39

Honestly, I think 'support' comes dangerously close to condoning.

People manage to stop doing all sorts of dangerous things in pregnancy. Smoking should be one of them. Knowing how much you are harming a baby for the rest of its life should be enough; if it's not, I doubt a web chat will be.

Original poster
PencilsInSpace · 06/08/2017 18:31

Flowers thanks for the bump!

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