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MNHQ

Mumsnet Christmas Appeal/Secret Santa - your thoughts please?

258 replies

JustineMumsnet · 08/09/2014 11:14

Hi all,

It's that time of year again where we are looking towards Christmas and thinking about the annual Mumsnet Secret Santa.

For those of you who've no clue what we're on about, the Mumsnet Christmas Appeal is an annual (obviously) tradition in which MNers nominate other MNers whom they feel to be particularly deserving of support/reward/love to receive a Secret Santa gift. More about it here - and here's how it works plus some FAQs, too.

As we said, it has a long and honourable history on MN - but some have suggested that now we've got Giving Week we should think about retiring the Secret Santa.

So we thought we'd take this opportunity to ask you, before we launch it as usual, if you'd like us to continue with it. We do love helping with the Secret Santa and the thankyou thread is always a very moving read, but it's quite a mammoth thing to organise and there have been a number of complaints about gifts not arriving and/or a lack of thankyou messages which has put a slight dampener on it in recent years.

In short we're happy to stop if folks think it has run its course - and happy to continue if people still think it's worthwhile.

We'd be very grateful for any and all thoughts. Please do post them here.

OP posts:
MNHQ
RowanMumsnet · 17/09/2014 10:20

From BIWI's posts it sounds as though we passed on to her the nominator's reasons for nominating the recipient, which is usually something like 'She's had a tough year because [eg her mother has been ill], but I really admire the way she's kept her chin up and she's a lovely presence on on the boards.'

MNHQ
RowanMumsnet · 17/09/2014 10:13

@usualsuspect333

It just makes me feel uncomfortable that HQ are discussing people who have been nominated with other posters.

I know you have to give a reason for nominating someone, but you don't have to go into detail about their financial affairs. After all unless you know the poster off board they could be making shit up on here.

It just doesn't sit right with me. I was given a number and an address and basic information I wouldn't have dreamt of probing any further than the information I was given.

Morning

As BIWI says, we'd never 'discuss' recipients with anyone (donators or otherwise). Recipients can, if they like, tell us a few facts about themselves - from memory this is things like how many children they have, boys or girls, what ages and so on, and when we have that we pass it on to donators. It's absolutely not a case of gossiping over the garden fence about posters' personal situations or financial affairs - that's not something we'd EVER do.

SauvignonBlanche · 16/09/2014 21:20

I'm glad it's carrying on. Smile

BIWI · 16/09/2014 21:07

Well, usual, I wanted to make sure that what I was buying was appropriate. What's wrong with that? Why is that wrong? Nobody is gossiping about anybody - the information has been provided by one poster based on what they have read about somebody/know about somebody from what they've posted on the boards. Obviously we all take the risk that somebody is making it up, but I'd rather err on the side of generosity.

EverythingCounts · 16/09/2014 20:57

If it's going ahead, I think both a financial limit and a ban on 'thankyou' threads would be helpful. From this thread it can easily be seen how the thankyou threads have been the cause of a lot of unhappiness - people seeing that other givers have bought more expensive gifts than them and feeling bad, people looking for a thankyou from their recipient and not seeing one, all the rest of it.

usualsuspect333 · 16/09/2014 20:48

It just makes me feel uncomfortable that HQ are discussing people who have been nominated with other posters.

I know you have to give a reason for nominating someone, but you don't have to go into detail about their financial affairs. After all unless you know the poster off board they could be making shit up on here.

It just doesn't sit right with me. I was given a number and an address and basic information I wouldn't have dreamt of probing any further than the information I was given.

BIWI · 16/09/2014 19:55

Why not, usual? I was given some information, but needed some clarification so I asked MNHQ. They were happy to oblige. I didn't ask any probing questions like 'are they poor' or something equally insensitive. And - in any case - they can only give you information that's been volunteered by the person who nominated the poster.

MrsHathaway · 16/09/2014 14:28

Surely the instructions could say something like "usually this gift should be of token value" and then it's up to the giver to decide what a token is, or perhaps Sandy could make a judgement call about which recipients need more than a token, to be matched with givers who have asked to give more substantially.

Viviennemary · 16/09/2014 14:19

I don't think there should be a cash limit. But telling people how much you have sent or what a generous gift you have received shouldn't really be done.

usualsuspect333 · 16/09/2014 14:02

I was just given basic info, age of child. I don't think it's HQs place to give you any more information than that.

OodneedsanOod · 16/09/2014 13:53

It's a matter of matching financial need to those who are in need financially and smaller treats to the 'good eggs'
No idea how you do that though BlushBlush

BIWI · 16/09/2014 13:50

I did know, because of the information I was given, and because I asked some specific questions about the poster(s) I was matched with.

usualsuspect333 · 16/09/2014 13:43

I think there should be a cash limit.

I think people are put off taking part by posts about the expensive gifts etc some posters have received.

If it's anonymous I'm not sure how you know who is in need. I had no idea who I donated to last year I was just given a number.

BIWI · 16/09/2014 13:34

Please don't put a cash limit on it.

In past Christmases I've given to people who I knew were in need (for one reason or another) and it was really lovely to be able to send them something that would help to ameliorate Wink their situation. I have been in the fortunate position to be able to afford to do that. I've never boasted about what I bought, never told anyone, just been grateful that I'm in a position to help make someone's Christmas a little bit nicer/better than they might have been able to afford.

IrenetheQuaint · 16/09/2014 12:14

That sounds good, Justine.

I have given via the Appeal the last couple of years and seeing the thank-you messages from the recipients was one of the nicest moments of my Christmas. It was also good being able to nominate Mners who have put loads of time and effort into helping other MNers in difficult situations while clearly not having the easiest lives themselves.

However, I wonder if there is an argument for suggesting a price limit - I did feel a bit Blush about sending an Amazon voucher, chocs and a couple of stocking fillers when there were so many posts expressing thanks for the Fortnum and Mason hamper, designer baby clothes etc.

MNHQ
JustineMumsnet · 16/09/2014 12:02

@ItsNotEasyBeingGreen

I had to look up "ameliorate" on dictionary.com.

Good word! :)

Thank you very much

OP posts:
ItsNotEasyBeingGreen · 16/09/2014 11:58

I had to look up "ameliorate" on dictionary.com.

Good word! :)

MNHQ
JustineMumsnet · 16/09/2014 11:56

Hello, hello
Ok, so from what we can see general opinion is that, notwithstanding a few irritations (including the word Appeal), the MN Secret Santa is worth keeping.

So we will soldier on - or more accurately SandyMumsnet will Smile - but we will also make a few modifications, namely

a) Change the name to Secret Santa or similar as appeal isn't right

b) Work on some tech modifications to improve the operation of things and to try to ameliorate some of the usual causes of disappointment/gripes (eg auto notifications/reminders/tracking)

We'll also look at including an alternative call to action to donate to a charity (eg Shelter/Refuge) - can't see any reason why we couldn't do this.

Thanks everyone for the input. We'll be kicking off 2014 Secret Santa in the next week or two.

OP posts:
EverythingCounts · 15/09/2014 08:10

They could declare it a fallow year and then decide in 2015 whether they want to go back to it, as they'll have the two options for comparison then.

PetulaGordino · 13/09/2014 20:17

i doubt they're going to give a response on a weekend

the MNHQ christmas gin appeal is going well though

Mumsnet Christmas Appeal/Secret Santa - your thoughts please?
Maryz · 13/09/2014 19:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LineRunner · 13/09/2014 18:38

Zombie Grin

IamtheZombie · 13/09/2014 18:36

Or perhaps they are trying out some new mulled wine recipes this weekend.

Mulling over the mulled.

Mulling over the mulled © Zombie 2014

LineRunner · 13/09/2014 18:23

Over the gin, more like.

FruVikingessOla · 13/09/2014 18:21

I suspect MNHQ will be mulling this over, over the next few weeks.