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Original poster

Does anyone else DREAD weekends

60 replies

WeekendDisliker · 18/04/2005 13:13

I am generally a happy-go-lucky person. I am 30 yrs old and a step mother to two girls (16+13) and dd (2yrs). My DH is 10 years older than me. I am starting to hate my life...

My saturday is spent - wake up feed dd, dress dd, dress me, go to shops, feed dd, put dd to sleep, cook lunch, clean house, do washing, cook dinner, bath dd, go to sleep.

Sunday - wake up feed dd, dress her & me, clean house, cook lunch, iron, cook dinner, bath dd, go to sleep.

Never enough money to go anywhere, DH never has enough iterest to take a drive/walk. Is this really what life is supposed to be about?????

OP posts:
Fimbo · 18/04/2005 13:35

Sorry have just read your last post, he's acting like Bruno from footballer's wives. Can't you stand up to him or is it nor possible?

compo · 18/04/2005 13:35

I think if you are really feeling down about all of this you need to sit down with the whole family and tell them how you would like things to be

cod · 18/04/2005 13:35

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cod · 18/04/2005 13:34

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zebraX · 18/04/2005 13:34

Can't your step-DD's babysit the 2yo?? Let you go out? Why don't the step-DD 's help with the housework or cooking? They're old enough, surely???

iota · 18/04/2005 13:34

agree with Daliah - they are perfectly capable of fending for themselves. At 16 the eldest girl should be capable of doing her own laundry, cooking dinner and cleaning the house as well.

I had a Sat job doing all that stuff when I was 16 - and looked after 2 small boys as well ( my employers, not mine)

feelingold · 18/04/2005 13:34

So a 16 and 13 year old and their dad are not capable of getting themselves some lunch while you go out???
My 9 year old is able to get herself a sandwich and some fruit etc.
I find that if you want to go out you have to make the plans yourself and then just tell everyone else 'we are going to go to XXX today so get ready we leave in 1 hour'.
My dh is fantastic around the house etc but never thinks to plan going out so I have to make the decisions and then just tell him where we are going.
If money is tight just plan to go out once a month somewhere eg swimming, bowling etc or cheaper options eg picnic in the park (summertime), walk by the river and stop off for a coffee or ice cream.
Good luck and make some plans!!

Fimbo · 18/04/2005 13:33

Couldn't you all go cycling together and have a picnic or go out for lunch? Does he not want to spend time with his children on the weekend?

oatcake · 18/04/2005 13:33

simple for us to say, but, things have to change... sorry.

Original poster
WeekendDisliker · 18/04/2005 13:32

His money goes to the morgage and fixing up things in the house, my money goes to feed us, clothe us and make SURE there is always food on the table when he is hungry... Its just my job. Thats how it always was... I just want some time out so that i can also have a bit of fun. Thought of doing pottery - but that would be hard with dd. If i dont have food on the table, or leave her with him to go to a pottery class, I get told I am not a good mother and that I must stop trying to be like my single friends who are always out and about - because I am not single and I have responsibilities at home.

OP posts:
bakedpotato · 18/04/2005 13:32

he sounds like he is controlling you. that thing about not needing other friends is a bit scary TBH. and you say he is jealous.. well, it's textbook.

cod · 18/04/2005 13:31

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Dahlia · 18/04/2005 13:30

Would he get the message that you aren't happy if he came home after cycling and you weren't there, and then you waltzed in 3 hours later saying what a lovely time you've had being out with your dd?

compo · 18/04/2005 13:29

why don't you REFUSE for a weekend and see what happens?

Original poster
WeekendDisliker · 18/04/2005 13:28

He REFUSES to do any housework. He believes his part is cars, shelves, drains and those things.

OP posts:
cod · 18/04/2005 13:28

Message withdrawn

Dahlia · 18/04/2005 13:28

I do my housework on a Friday night - I spend about 2 hours max and it looks perfectly respectable. Leaves the weekend free. And why cook lunch? If they are 13 and 16, can't they make a sandwich? And when he gets back from his indulgent morning, tell him to make his own lunch too!!

bootsmonkey · 18/04/2005 13:28

Why do you need to come home & get lunch ready??? Who for??? Is he incapable of feeding himself???

compo · 18/04/2005 13:28

why can't you go out for longer? take your dd swimming and then to pizza hit. or shopping or to the park or to a play area

wild · 18/04/2005 13:28

Get him to attach child seat to bike and take dd to give you a break, or you could all go including the two big girls.

cod · 18/04/2005 13:28

Message withdrawn

WideWebWitch · 18/04/2005 13:27

But why isn't HE doing housework and cooking? It's his house too!

Original poster
WeekendDisliker · 18/04/2005 13:26

What would I go do? dd will have to go with and I would only have about an hour or so... what do u guys do on a weekend?

OP posts:
zebraX · 18/04/2005 13:25

Could You go out for lunch, or even just a mid-morning cake? Cyclists' tea-shops are usually fairly friendly places to take your children to.

Original poster
WeekendDisliker · 18/04/2005 13:25

Sadly Cod, he never cycles with ppl. Always alone. I wish I could just walk away from a dirty house, but I know I could never enjoy myself if the house was a mess... and as all mothers of two year olds know - dd CAN MESS!!!!

OP posts: