I feel so weary

Is there anywhere you can make some friends? Are there any mumsnetters near you - have you asked?

are there no clubs you could sign up to - however random and bizarre it sounds - you just might hit on something you are interested in...?

stone wall building
teaching
playgroups
join local NCT
volutary work for a charity or library or school or old peoples home?

Titania, I have never regularly ironed my bedclothes. Once in a while if I'm in the mood to feel like Martha Stewart, but otherwise I just try and dry them as straight as possible to minimise the creases, and then offer up thanks for fitted sheets.

I know the thread has moved on from sheets, but had to mention this!

If you and your family are warm, clean (ish) and fed, then that's all that matters - details such as ironing bedclothes (and frankly anything like t shirts, or jeans or pajamas I put way down the priority list.). We do have someone who helps us at the moment, so we are in better shape than we usually are, but the minute she is no longer with us the old rules will apply!

There's lots of free fresh air then? a library? a farm shop? set yourself a new walking task each day - every day walk a tiny bit further and a bit faster - get the blood pumping and your heart racing a bit - breathe in fresh air. Give yourself a mantra - something that you repeat to yourself in your head with each few steps - something positive:

"the ironing doesn't matter"
"my kids need me and I need them"
"each lungfull of air will make the cobwebs go away"

I don't know!?

Do you have a friend/relly near by that you can walk to every other day - for a coffee and a meaningless chat about celebrity relationships?!

what about trying new cafes or window shopping or trying swimming or jogging or chocolate shops - just something which gets you out of the house so you're not feeling trapped and guilty by all the housework you're not doing. staying in the house really won't be helping you - I had a very low point a few weeks back where for 2 weeks all I did was stay in the cold house, rooted to my pc, on mumsnet. As great as MN is, it is so important to get out and stop thinking about how sad you're feeling. Easier said than done I know. But truly - get some fresh air - go on a brisk walk once you've dropped the kids off in the mornings - treat yourself to a nice cup of coffee somewhere, with a newspaper or magazine. RELAX for a bit.

is there anything you enjoy like swimming or cinema that you could go and do? Do you have kids to look after today?

Hey Titania hope you feel a bit better today.

Honestly you do too much. Whats going to happen if your sheets aren't ironed? will the kids love you less? no. will dh? no. Will all these mumsnetters rally round to point the finger and pour scorn? hell no. Will you get ten minutes to do something else or maybe just to do nothing? yes.

I remember reading your daily housework routine on another thread and being amazed that one woman with kids could do so much in a day!

But sometimes its better to let the house work go hang (and lets face it your view of dirty is probably my vision of hygiene paradise) and just allow yourself to be still for a bit. Doing nothing for a while is not a sin!

I know that when you feel out of control in life, little things become really important to show that you do still have an element of control - but honestly, ironing is NOT important. Make a list of what is important and on the other side make yourself write down what really isn't important.

What is important is your health and sanity.
What isn't important is whether your sheets are ironed.
What is important is that you feel you still have a bit of 'you time'.
What isn't important is having a spotless bathroom.

Of course it's nice to feel on top of everything and have a lovely clean, tidy and ordered house - but at the end of the day noone is going to suffer terribly if the house is not perfect. You cannot be superwoman all the time. Accept that some things are going to have to go to pot for a little while until you feel stronger and have more energy.

Good luck. I'm sorry if I sound like I'm preaching - I don't know your situation - but I do understand the needing to keep control over little things in the house which really DON'T matter.

Titania you are too hard on yourself my kitchen table is covered in the breakfast things still and here I am on the computer

is there anything you can do that you will enjoy - video/music whatever

if you are too knackered to do the kitchen, you're too knackered - much better to have a proper break than to fret about it.

hey titania! well done on getting so much done. I don't iron sheets!! Where are you now - tucked up and resting?

T. I cant remember if ds or dd's but regardless they wont look back on their childhood and wonder if the sheets were pressed.

You need to look after yourself and rest and enjoy them. Housework can keep, childhood doesnt.

You arent useless at all and I hope you are ok.

Thinking of you xxx

Hiya mate, have posted a thread looking for you.

Am back online obviously, but have had to re install msn from scratch and can't remember your email address to speak to you iykwim. Mine is [email protected] if you wanna add me to your contacts.

If you wanna chat you know where i am .

big cuddle and a reassuring hug from me titania

Oh Titania!!!
My poor love! Really, bugger the bedsheets next time (and I speak as a quite quite mad ironer-even do dishtowels. It's not good for us you know!)
Goodness, MN is a sad place to be tonight.

Titania - just don't do the things that really don't need doing! Really, the sheets don't need to be ironed, OK they might look better but honestly, IT DOESN'T MATTER! just try to look after yourself as much as you can.

Titania Sweetheart, you need a rest. I'm sorry I don't know if you have dds or dss but they need you - not your sheets. You're not useless. Give yourself a treat and put your feet up. And give yourself permission not to be superwoman for a while, but someone in need of a bit of TLC. Lots of luck, Hope you get some sleep xxx