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Original poster

When does PND turn into Depression.........and what is the difference?

32 replies

emmatmg · 27/02/2005 10:34

Firstly, I know there is a million treads on this but TBH I haven't got the energy to look through them all and would really like aquick answer.

After Ds3 was born I had a bit of a run in with PND but thanks to my HV (and here) I recognised the signs and I got over ir quickly.

Now I been feeling quite shit lately and this morning just had a complete, well the only way I can describe it is a meltdown brought on be the simple fact the DH had a lie in (again). I have been in tears. scraeming that he has no idea how miserable I am and he hasn't. I'm not sleeping well ATM and when he commented on the fact that I choose to stay up late I lost. I don'tfucking well choose to, I can't sleep so whats the point of lying in bed wide awake.

I just have this horrible "I don't care" feeling all the time and living with a neurotic and anal man like DH(a whole other thread that) drives me mad.

Do you think by reading this little snapshot of my life that it's PND again, depression of just a selfish wanker of a DH?

Sorry about typos and crap puncuation.

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Original poster
emmatmg · 28/02/2005 12:13

Had a relatively good night sleep, woke early becuase of the alarm going off.

Not sure if it's made me feel any better, but I think I agree wih you Roobie about being able to put my finger on the reason. I'll wait a while to see if anything cahnges at home after yesterday.....I doubt it will though

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Roobie · 27/02/2005 19:49

Don't have any experience with PND but I would have thought if you can actually 'lose it' and put your finger on what makes you lose then it is likely to be tangible external factors that are making you depressed - ie your dh and his lack of support. I must admit I did have a small smile to myself when I read your description of his little ways - it sounds so much like my dh...totally anally retentive about so many things! Our house is like a minimalists dream with white walls, no toys around once dd in bed etc but still he is always going on about what a state it is in and manically wiping surfaces etc.

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 19:44

well, he is home tonight and the thought of idle chit chat fills me with dread, so probably will finally get an early night, will make sure it's ALONE.

kid's in bed now so can't run the bath unless I want 3 little helpers.

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WideWebWitch · 27/02/2005 19:41

emmatmg, I know this is inadequate advice really but could you go and have a bath and an early night and tihnk abotu this again tomorrow? Sleep will make all the difference (if you can, I know).

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 19:39

I think I could safely say that the atmosphere here could be cut with a blunt knife.

UUGGHHH! what a fantasic day I've had

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Gobbledigook · 27/02/2005 12:05

Oh Emma - so sorry to hear you are feeling low. TBH, it sounds like you are lacking in sleep and getting little help. I too would go ballistic if dh was staying in bed while I got up with 3 kids.

xx

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 12:01

he's back......

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blueteddy · 27/02/2005 11:55

We are going to move house soon & I dread it because I know dh will be worse!
He found a small pen mark on the radiator the other dat & said if it happens in the new house he will throw out all pens along with me & the kids
I hope he was not serious!

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 11:51

Yep, although it's got worse as the house has been decorated.

He's does the DIY and it's painstakingly slow and he wants it to be like a show home.

HA, with 3 boys it's a long way from that!

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blueteddy · 27/02/2005 11:48

Has he always been like this?

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 11:46

another example he washed down the kitchen cupbaords every week, yes, i wipe them if I see a splog of something but the whole lot?
I've just counted and there are 13 doors and 5 drawers, he does the ALL.....why???

btw is I disappear suddenly it's because he's back from swimming.

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blueteddy · 27/02/2005 11:42

Sound EXACTUALLY lkie my dh!
Everyone comments on how tidy our house is & he will come in & say it is a sh*t hole!

blueteddy · 27/02/2005 11:41

Tiredness & not being able to sleep can both be symptoms of depression.

megandsoph · 27/02/2005 11:41

haha aye marines, navy, raf all the bloody same.... :D of my experience with them anyways.

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 11:40

Yes blueteddy it is.

I think he see it as a pigsty when no-one else can see a mess. Drives me around the twist.

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biglips · 27/02/2005 11:38

emma - i cant really help you on the PND but my baba is 4.5 months old and every Sat DP have a lie in whilst i look after baba and Sun i have a lie in whilst DP look after baba as tiredness screw me up if i have lack of sleep as i get very moody out of the blue.

SeaShells · 27/02/2005 11:36

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way em, your DH sounds very obsessive, it must be really hard living with him, a sympton of my illness was being very obsessive, I used to make the bed while DP was still in it, I even once got up onto the kitchen units and cleaned the top of the cupboards ffs! I went onto AD and now I'm just a slob like everyone else perhaps your DH might be in need of some sort of help?

blueteddy · 27/02/2005 11:29

It is a nightmare living with ultra tidy men isn't it?!

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 11:21

well, his brother used to be in the marines....does that count?

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megandsoph · 27/02/2005 11:17

yeah he really does,
sounds so much like my ex.... and my dad (both Squaddies). hmmmm....

blueteddy · 27/02/2005 11:16

My H also drives me mad because he wants everything tidy all the time & will notice the smallest bit of food on the floor after my ds's have eaten.
THe children even have to have wicker chests from Next 4 their toy boxes, so they will blend in with the furniture!
People think I am lucky to live with a tidy man, but give me an untidy man any day!

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 11:13

No, he a train driver.

does he sound like a squaddie then?

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megandsoph · 27/02/2005 11:12

emmatmg,
Hun he isn't a squaddie by any chance is he???

Clare
x

dramaqueen72 · 27/02/2005 11:09

hi emma, not being able to sleep tho desperately tired is a classic depression 'sign'. and that closed in feeling of no good days behind or in front of you. i'd say you were also very very tired, and that alone makes everything seem like a mountain rather than a molehill. I've certainly been there, screaming at dh and breaking down totally cause i hadnt slept and yet had to 'get on' with another normal days routine. go and speak to your HV again if she was helpful before. dont brush it under the carpet as a one of, just incase.
you need some decent sleep, and a lot more understanding from your other half.
I hope you get an 'up' day soon, and find some support.

Original poster
emmatmg · 27/02/2005 11:08

I ofen joke that HE is turning in to my mother but I seriously think he is. He cleans things that aren't dirty, re-tidies things, makes beds that I've already made....these are all thing sthat my Mum does.

In addition to that he also moans about the paper work on the kitchen side (it's all his), makes comments like "Oh, don't forget the washing" "Do you want me to get the hoover out for you??" Is neurotic about the kids having claen hands (ds2 like DRY toast for breakfast and says he has sticky hand after eating it....errr it's dry.....not covered in jam).

Another tiny snapshot of my life but God, I could go on and on and on.

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