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Mental health

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Stressed, trapped etc.

1 reply

J7223j · Today 15:53

I moved far from home when I had the kids 23 years ago. I have a good husband. I worked part time for 18 or so years to look after kids. I was always the higher earner so went without for this time quite a bit. The town we moved to is small and has been good for kids and their education etc. I think for a long time I realised I missed the city and have felt that I don't really have a lot in common with people here - small mindedness, town gossips with nothing better to do, Lack of choices of places to visit, nearest cities 50 miles away. I now work full time but feel my job is increasingly stressful, again lack of choice of jobs here so feel trapped as need to earn a certain amount to cover bills and have some sort of life. Feel the stress takes over a lot and I struggle to switch off, kids arn't around much theses days and feel I need to start doing stuff for myself but no idea what - not a lot of choice here and I dont feel I have much in common with people here different music taste fashion taste travel etc. Would love to move nearer to city at some point but youngest definitely not ready to move out - feel frustrated trapped bored and stressed. Getting more and more work put on me at work literally dont stop all day and by the time i get home my brain is knackered - find the local fitness classes cleaky. Nobody you can talk to here as if you do its town gossip in a matter of days and dont have interest in friends like that. Just feel so trapped. Only time I feel content is on holiday or when I'm out and about in the city. Wondered if anyone else felt like this at 53 and if so what you have done about it. Hubby is lovely and always seems content in work life etc - his job isn't stressful and he's a pretty laid back person.

OP posts:
Eyesopenwideawake · Today 16:48

Your post is full of negativity about the place where you've lived for 23 years. The problem might be that, once you decide you (generic you) don't like/want something, your mind starting looking for validation of your argument – it's subjective, not objective. It's called cognitive bias; it's like when you decide to buy a red Ford Fiesta you start seeing red Ford Fiestas everywhere.

Maybe if you active started looking for positives about your environment in the same way you are looking for negatives, you might start finding some.

Oh, and talk to your doctor about menopause options.

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