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Original poster

18yo mental health crisis and services reluctance to admit

10 replies

WhatsitWiggle · 12/07/2026 19:15

My child is 18yo, has struggled with mental health - severe anxiety, burnout, eating - for almost 4 years. Diagnosed autism and ADHD.

CAMHS discharged without any therapy as Teen turned 18 before reaching top of waitlist. Now under adult services and going through fortnightly chats with lead practitioner who is getting to know her and relaying Q&A to MDT.

Mood worsened significantly last week, Teen is having visions of killing me and herself. Described as POV videos in her head.

Teen was accepted into a community crisis assessment unit on Friday night after all other avenues exhausted. This is like a mental health A&E, it's intended for up to 23 hours. Teen has been there since 10pm Friday as she is deemed too unsafe to be told to leave.

Teen wants to be admitted to a psych ward, she just want to get better and is scared of coming home because of what she might do. Nurses seem reluctant to push for this, despite me telling them I cannot watch Teen 24/7 and Teen saying she will hurt herself, she has a plan and the means to do so.

As an example, Teen is not allowed her laptop and phone chargers in the unit in case she uses them as a ligature. I cannot realistically secure all the cables in the household each day/night.

WWYD? I'm not sure if me telling the nurse in the morning that Teen needs to be admitted will make any difference.

OP posts:
Thiscantgoonlikethis · 12/07/2026 19:21

If they’re not detainable, they would have to go in voluntarily. And there is such a beds shortage at present. I wouldn’t pin all your hopes on hospital, I know it’s hard because you Dong have other options apart from home treatment, but hospitals are really helpful, they aren’t usually very nice, in terms of the other patients going through their own struggles. Doctors might put them on some medication, thats really it. They’re unlikely to get psychology or any other therapy.
It’s really tough, and I know you’re probably terrified, but I rarely see happy endings when young people are admitted. Especially ND young people. It more often than not starts a cycle of admissions and dependency on services to keep themselves safe.

Original poster
WhatsitWiggle · 12/07/2026 21:20

😭 thank you for replying. Deep down i know this, im just really scared at how bad she is right now. It's been getting progressively worse over such a long time, im so tired trying to keep her stable and stay calm when she harms herself, destroys things in my home, tells me multiple times a day she wants to die.

OP posts:
WajeehaKamran2 · 13/07/2026 11:24

Reading this really broke my heart. If your teen is saying she has thoughts of harming herself and you, and she's asking to be admitted because she doesn't feel safe, I would keep making that very clear to the team and ask for a senior clinician to review things if needed. You know her better than anyone. I've also seen ADHD Certify talk about how autism and ADHD can sometimes complicate mental health presentations, which is why specialist input is so important. I really hope both you and your daughter get the support you need. It sounds like you've been carrying an enormous amount on your own.

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PinkPanda99 · 15/07/2026 15:18

I am so sorry to hear you’re going through this. I’m not ND but some of the rest of this sounds very similar to what I went through at the same age. I ended up being admitted twice for a similar reason- nobody could keep me safe. You know your teen better than anyone, and I honestly don’t think you have any choice but to be adamant that you cannot keep her safe at home and escalate it as far as you can for her to be admitted.

I was diagnosed with bipolar later and although I’ve been through difficult patches, I have 3 children, a happy marriage, a job and a mortgage. I hope that gives you some hope. Good luck with everything.

Original poster
WhatsitWiggle · 19/07/2026 12:02

Thank you for your input.

Teen is still being held at the crisis unit. She's been started on respiridone, a very low dose, no impact as yet. We had a meeting yesterday - their suggestions were home under the crisis team (one hour visit per day) or supported accommodation. I had to point out she isn't independent as they expected her to go food shopping and cook for herself in a town shes never visited, 1.5 hours from home. She said to them if she was unsupervised she would find a way and told them all the things shes done at home and how she doesn't even realise until she sees the aftermath.

They said we'd rejected inpatient and I said we hadnt but that their staff had been reluctant due to the autism and id agreed it wasn't my preferred option but I couldn't see how I could keep her (and others) safe.

After a conversation where Teen explained how she isn't in control of her moods and thoughts, they explained that it sounded like she didn't always have competency and referred for a MHA assessment. That's happening this afternoon.

The lady from the council is the autism specialist, she called me yesterday so im allowed to attend as a reasonable adjustment. And sounded quite frustrated that previous support had been withdrawn once Teen started college and has put in referrals for things I couldn't do myself and would coordinate those I had.

Im so sad its got to this stage but I feel now that she needs the right assessment and medication to stabilise.

OP posts:
FMLpassthegin · 20/07/2026 11:00

WhatsitWiggle · 19/07/2026 12:02

Thank you for your input.

Teen is still being held at the crisis unit. She's been started on respiridone, a very low dose, no impact as yet. We had a meeting yesterday - their suggestions were home under the crisis team (one hour visit per day) or supported accommodation. I had to point out she isn't independent as they expected her to go food shopping and cook for herself in a town shes never visited, 1.5 hours from home. She said to them if she was unsupervised she would find a way and told them all the things shes done at home and how she doesn't even realise until she sees the aftermath.

They said we'd rejected inpatient and I said we hadnt but that their staff had been reluctant due to the autism and id agreed it wasn't my preferred option but I couldn't see how I could keep her (and others) safe.

After a conversation where Teen explained how she isn't in control of her moods and thoughts, they explained that it sounded like she didn't always have competency and referred for a MHA assessment. That's happening this afternoon.

The lady from the council is the autism specialist, she called me yesterday so im allowed to attend as a reasonable adjustment. And sounded quite frustrated that previous support had been withdrawn once Teen started college and has put in referrals for things I couldn't do myself and would coordinate those I had.

Im so sad its got to this stage but I feel now that she needs the right assessment and medication to stabilise.

Thinking of you @WhatsitWiggle and hope that the MHA went well and that a plan is in place. Wishing you all the best.

Ginflinger · 20/07/2026 11:27

Me too @WhatsitWiggle I really hope you have seen some good steps forward. You are doing an incredible job at such a hard time.

Original poster
WhatsitWiggle · 20/07/2026 12:12

Thank you both. I feel numb right now, I think the stress of the last few weeks has taken it's toll. She is waiting for a bed to come free somewhere across our county, and is still being kept at the crisis unit in the meantime.

OP posts:
bellalou1234 · 20/07/2026 13:18

Sorry your going through this

stepupp · 20/07/2026 13:31

Good luck OP, I'm glad someone that knows about ASD is involved.

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