Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend's dog bit a child, whose fault?

284 replies

karrabee · Yesterday 09:43

Dog was on a lead, probably 1.5 metres ahead. Family of 2 adults and 2 children walking past in opposite direction. Children probably 4 and 8? As they walked past the younger girl darted towards the dog and put her hand on his head (flat palm almost like she was hitting him but I think she was trying to pat him on the head) and he nipped her. We were passing each other on a path in a park so were quite close already. Had zero time to do anything as from her walking past to touching him happened in about 1.5 seconds. We had no interaction with the other family prior to this. Dog has never bitten before, we think he just got a fright from the girl, but the family went mad and started threatening to call the police saying we have a dangerous dog (he's am old staffy who has never bitten once and we were so shocked that he even nipped her as he is extremely gentle!). Family followed us round the park and kept shouting 'we know where you live, police are going to be well aware of you'. The girl wasn't injured, skin wasn't broken, but she was obviously scared. Surely this is the fault of the family for not teaching their children not to touch dogs? I don't have a dog so haven't really had to think about it before, but my son knows not to touch dogs without confirming with the owner that they're friendly. It is drilled into him!

OP posts:
SoThatsTheWayItIs · Yesterday 10:24

grumpygrape · Yesterday 10:18

1.5m is not a long lead
Child should have been on a lead if it's likely to smack pat random dogs.

Too long for the situation of passing others, especially children on a narrow path. A bit of common sense on both sides and this would not have happened.

LaceFerret · Yesterday 10:27

It is the child's parents fault and also your friends fault equally. They should teach the child not to approach dogs, and your friend should keep it on a tight lead as common courtesy when passing unpredictable kids. I do this even with my small whippet who worships children. Because she's an animal! Thus is unpredictable too.

Wiseplumnet · Yesterday 10:28

Parents should have taught children of this age not to approach or touch strange dogs. Dog was on lead and therefore under control, It wasn't muzzled but had no biting history. Like the poster up thread, I pull over with our dog to the side of narrow pathways until people have passed by. My dog has never bitten, but I could never guarantee how he wouldn't react to young children moving quickly toward him. The parents are responsible for keeping their children safe ( different if dog is uncontrolled in public). Definitely not the dogs fault and I doubt this would go further. You may want to preempt by reporting incident to 101 just so it is logged and you get your side in , if anything the family threatening you would be taken more seriously.

LVPLVT · Yesterday 10:29

It’s the parent’s fault but now your friend will need to muzzle the dog when out in public.

Screamingabdabz · Yesterday 10:30

Dog owner should have drawn the dog in when passing young children. Especially a powerful breed like that. If it’s ’equal fault’ the child’s welfare still takes precedent.

Sunsunsuns · Yesterday 10:33

The parents fault.
Child should know never to touch a strange dog.
Muzzle time probably

PointyNoseDog · Yesterday 10:34

karrabee · Yesterday 09:43

Dog was on a lead, probably 1.5 metres ahead. Family of 2 adults and 2 children walking past in opposite direction. Children probably 4 and 8? As they walked past the younger girl darted towards the dog and put her hand on his head (flat palm almost like she was hitting him but I think she was trying to pat him on the head) and he nipped her. We were passing each other on a path in a park so were quite close already. Had zero time to do anything as from her walking past to touching him happened in about 1.5 seconds. We had no interaction with the other family prior to this. Dog has never bitten before, we think he just got a fright from the girl, but the family went mad and started threatening to call the police saying we have a dangerous dog (he's am old staffy who has never bitten once and we were so shocked that he even nipped her as he is extremely gentle!). Family followed us round the park and kept shouting 'we know where you live, police are going to be well aware of you'. The girl wasn't injured, skin wasn't broken, but she was obviously scared. Surely this is the fault of the family for not teaching their children not to touch dogs? I don't have a dog so haven't really had to think about it before, but my son knows not to touch dogs without confirming with the owner that they're friendly. It is drilled into him!

It’s the child that’s out of control not the dog. The parents are 100% at fault, they need to teach their children not to rush up to dogs and to ask before touching.

That said if the dog had been walking at heel instead of ahead, the owner might have had time to stop the child trying to touch the dog. My dogs are always beside me, between me and the wall/edge of path, not in the middle, one of them is quite anxious so I make sure I’m between him and anyone walking past, or towards us. I shouldn’t need to take these kinds of precautions, but sadly we have to because so many people think dogs are public property and they can touch them without asking.

I also notice that most people try to touch the top of a dogs head, even though this is quite a threatening thing for a dog, even when mine are backing away or moving their head out of reach people keep reaching over them. I know not everyone is a ‘dog person’ but surely if you reach to stroke the top of a dogs head and it backs away or moves you can take the hint??

ExpressCheckout · Yesterday 10:35

Dog lover here. Basic rules apply here -

Parents - never allow your child to run towards a dog. Always ask permission before approaching a dog. Never shout or make sudden loud noises near a dog. Teach your child confidence, cheerfulness and common sense with dogs. Do not unwittingly teach your child to be afraid of dogs.

Owners - only use long leads in open locations where it's safe to do so. Don't use your phone whilst walking your dog. Shortened leads on paths, pavements etc. Full attention on your dog at all times. Oh, and the banned breed list applies to everyone, for good reasons.

Bitsostuff · Yesterday 10:36

If this had been a proper, aggressive bite then that would be the fault of the dog owner. A dog that will bite w no warning should always be muzzled. But a startled nip? That's just the response of a dog that's been taken unawares.

Lovemuesli · Yesterday 10:36

My granddaughter loved patting dogs when she was younger and we picked her up from school. She always knew to ask the owner if she could pat their dog. (There were always a couple of dogs tied to railings). The owners always said yes.

It was the parents' fault. Children should ask before patting dogs.

Tillow4ever · Yesterday 10:44

I’d have put it back to the parents that had I walked up to them and smacked their child on the head, and their child bit me on the arm, would they be blaming me or their child for the situation?

Of course it’s the fault of someone approaching a dog they don’t know without permission. As this was a young child, that fault moves to the parents - it’s on them to teach this to their children and to keep their kids safe. They did neither.

I came onto the thread fully expecting to say this was the dog or owners fault, but I don’t think it was. 1.5m doesn’t sound particularly far ahead to me - about a stride and a half? But I don’t have a dog so I don’t know the different length leads you can get.

ForPlumReader · Yesterday 10:47

SoThatsTheWayItIs · Yesterday 09:50

Dogs and children are an unpredictable mix. My dog has never bitten but in such circumstance I would always move him to be on my inside and away from passers-by and with no slack on the lead.

Fault on both sides but not on the dog’s fault. Parents should teach children not to approach but owners need to be aware protect their dogs from unexpected approaches.

Edited

This

Catseawitch · Yesterday 10:48

The idiot parents are responsible. They should have taught their child not to run to random dogs and touch them.

The dog was on a lead and minding its own business...

Pastasaladaddict · Yesterday 10:50

1.5m is not a long lead. That's only 1.5 steps ahead and if walking that's totally normal. My dog is on a normal lead and is probably that far ahead of me when walking, otherwise I would trip over him.

My DC have know since they could walk that you never approach a dog, you always ask the owner first. We have been lucky that this has always been the case when kids have wanted to say hello to our dog when out and about. They have asked very politely and we have asked them to be nice and calm because he's still young and can get a little bit excited. There have been zero issues.

The parents are fully at fault here. Plus it's an older Staffie, they look hard as hell but in reality they are mostly absolute wimps, the dog gave a warning which is what it should have done in the circumstances. Hopefully the child and parents have learnt a valuable lesson.

Mycatiscraycray · Yesterday 10:55

Who’d let their kid slap a random dog on the head then complain when it reacted? I’m no dog lover but jeez

karrabee · Yesterday 10:56

Where did the narrow bit come from? The path is large, I'd say about 4 metres wide at least. It's a wide path that goes round the outside of the whole park. People cycle and walk around it. Thanks for all responses!

OP posts:
Itiswhysofew · Yesterday 10:57

It would be a shock to the child and parents, but they should've been in control. I walk my niece's Staffy and I'm so careful with him. I have to say though, anyone that wants to say hello or pet him always ask. I haven't encountered any kids rushing up to him, thank goodness. Maybe my stern face puts them offGrin

I had a friend who always had Boxers. She was walking them one day and two kids came running over to them. She stopped them and told the mother off!

Gizlotsmum · Yesterday 11:01

karrabee · Yesterday 10:56

Where did the narrow bit come from? The path is large, I'd say about 4 metres wide at least. It's a wide path that goes round the outside of the whole park. People cycle and walk around it. Thanks for all responses!

Your original post says passing on a path so quite close together already which is probably where posters took narrow from

Savvysix1984 · Yesterday 11:10

Both are at fault. When I’m passing people on a street I always pull my dog close so that he’s at my heal. I also think the other parents need to teach their child not to approach a dog without permission.

CherryKerry · Yesterday 11:10

100% kids fault but owner maybe needs a shorter lead to keep full control.

Older dog probably can't see and hear as well as they used to so that will hopefully stop dog getting a fright and lashing out.

Regardless of fault, its not worth the risk as imagine how awful your friend would feel if their dog chomped a toddlers finger off.

Personally, if I had people following me round the park acting in a threatening manner I would have called the police for my own safety too.

oviraptor21 · Yesterday 11:12

Owner's fault. Dog should have been kept at heel once children had been seen.
Dog needs nuzzling now.

oviraptor21 · Yesterday 11:13

Wiseplumnet · Yesterday 10:28

Parents should have taught children of this age not to approach or touch strange dogs. Dog was on lead and therefore under control, It wasn't muzzled but had no biting history. Like the poster up thread, I pull over with our dog to the side of narrow pathways until people have passed by. My dog has never bitten, but I could never guarantee how he wouldn't react to young children moving quickly toward him. The parents are responsible for keeping their children safe ( different if dog is uncontrolled in public). Definitely not the dogs fault and I doubt this would go further. You may want to preempt by reporting incident to 101 just so it is logged and you get your side in , if anything the family threatening you would be taken more seriously.

As has been demonstrated - on lead was not under control.

FrogsAtDawn · Yesterday 11:18

Both. Parents should have made sure the child didn’t go towards the dog. Dog owner should have had the dog closer. This is why when I see someone with a dog approaching I make sure child is on other side of me to the dog.

oviraptor21 · Yesterday 11:19

oviraptor21 · Yesterday 11:12

Owner's fault. Dog should have been kept at heel once children had been seen.
Dog needs nuzzling now.

Muzzling obviously - although some nuzzling is fine too as the dog didn't do anything wrong

BluebellBeth · Yesterday 11:20

50/50 imo.

Parents should teach children not to touch dogs without asking, but she's 4 so still very young and perhaps she's never done this before either.

owners should keep dogs close when passing others as you simply never know what might happen, as this case demonstrates.