AIBU to think a teenage son would not be spoiled by this?

107 replies

Neonnectarines · 19/09/2026 02:09

Recently, our household income has increased, and we can now afford to give our DS some treats and luxuries. The opportunity has come up for us to buy a house, which has a big bedroom for him, with adjoining sitting room, which we would be a fun space for him to spend time with friends (he is 14).

My friend thinks I should withhold privileges like this from my DS, or he will be spoiled. For context, this friend is much wealthier than us, but they have different money priorities. They have a huge house, but would never “give my DC their own sitting room”.

All the usual caveats apply. I absolutely know we are in a position of relative privilege to many, but AIBU to think that my DS will not automatically be spoiled just because of having his own sitting room? When he was younger we were quite strapped for cash, so he will have experienced both sides of things.

OP posts:

Mosaic80 · 21/09/2026 16:02

I dont think that would spoil a teen ds and you know your son and his personality already. I dont think giving him an extra space is going to change him completely! Like someone else said id not want it to lead to him spending less time with family but again, you know him and whether that’s likely to be an issue.

Nameychangington · 21/09/2026 16:07

Do it. My DS has his bedroom plus a box room with his Xbox, TV, bean bags etc. None of his friends call him spoilt and we have no issues with friends trashing the place or anything else suggested. When he was younger he had to share a room and we had an outside toilet.

I've got a friend likes yours I think, they've got enough bedrooms for all the DC to have their own room, but is making the younger 2 share until the oldest goes to uni, for no reason I can see. I don't get it.

Etincelle · 21/09/2026 16:10

Sounds good. I stay in my bedroom when young adult dc have friends over. So they can relax. What you are planning sounds better

Mumtryingtolivethedream · 23/09/2026 14:35

I think its great for him maybe involve him in the decorating and the design so he has some pride of it and explain he has to help keep it clean and tidy if hes to have friends over.

TheLambtonWorm · 23/09/2026 14:40

My friend had this, it wasn't an expensive house she just had the attic space which was a large room with 2 additional rooms coming off it. Least spoiled person I knew. It was an excellent bedroom. One wall was blackboard paint. I was so jealous of her 😂 seriously though, giving a child additional space isn't going to "spoil" then (what a grim phrase too).

Elsvieta · 25/09/2026 07:30

Lots of kids have playrooms, in houses where there's two downstairs reception rooms. And then when they're older it can be a teen hangout room where you can shut the door on their noisy mates / video games / unfortunate choice of music / whatever. If you've got the space, it's a great thing.

MiniCoopers · 25/09/2026 08:42

Your ‘friend’ is not happy your finances have improved and doesn’t want hon having a better/bigger house …..

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