Lending things to neighbours

YANBU will they pay for it if they break it?

Also, why are they asking you and not your husband?

A ride-on lawn mower is an expensive item and requires fuel, servicing etc. So I would say no, as I would if they wanted to borrow our car.

Perhaps your husband could offer a lawn cutting service at the current going rate?

What i find easier when refusing someones request is that I bring up something I HAVE done for them.

For example "sorry no we won't be lending out the ride-on mower. I didn't mind lending you the ladder but not the mower, sorry."

Just remind them of something you HAVE done. I find it shuts people up.

Have you sent them a pro forma invoice for the annual service of said lawnmower? Once that’s paid they can perhaps use it. Otherwise they can fuck off.

"I can't loan the mower because of insurance restrictions."

This all seems very one sided. What have they offered to lend you?

Sounds unbearable - honestly, I would move 😂

Suggest if it's to become the Communal Mower that's great you can split the cost of purchase and servicing etc. And if he pops round later you'll have the invoice ready.

Their historic version of "helping each other out" doesn't match yours as a newcomer. Dynamics change over time. They might not like that, but helping neighbours is allowed to have boundaries.

It is an insurance issue, I would say that. It would get out of hand and everyone would want to borrow it. Say your insurance says for your own use only or not commercially.

Also, what do they do for you? Airport dropping is handy, and you can do it for someone who agrees to do it for you too, in equal amounts only. It works best when it is fair.

I had something similar not with lending but same principle, with a holiday home and friends asking to stay there for free, as they didn’t offer to pay. I said no, and they said but you let blah stay there. I said blah is one family and they have a holiday home that I want to use for the same amount of time a year and so it’s fair and not out of control. They thought that was unfair to them as they didn’t have a holiday home to offer. So they want me to let them wear the place out and then get funny if they damage something and I ask them to pay, no thanks.

I would hate to live with such expectations.Ride ons are expensive

Hell no!

Next time your husband uses it, he needs to have a loud conversation with himself. “They want to “borrow” my mower but will they respect me? Will they replace the fuel? Will they replace the blades? Will they take Mo the Mower for services? We all know that this is a NO!” Whilst glaring around randomly.

they won’t come near you!!

Ask if you can borrow their car? Or something equally unreasonable. To be fair, if they said yes I’d consider lending the mower (or doing their lawn for them)

You ought to have nipped this all in the bud at the start by telling them to fuck off.

Its your house and you are not obligated to do things for other neighbours.

Asking for the ride on mower is like handing them your car. Cheeky and entitled as hell.

You need to establish better boundaries I think.

I’d say go with the insurance reason. It is only insured to be used on your land. It’s a machine that could damage property/injure or kill living things if used incorrectly, or if it malfunctioned, and your insurance says you cannot be liable for that. Suppose the brakes went, it careered into neighbour no 3’s car and neighbour no 2 (to whom you’d loaned it) fell off and broke their hip and then ran over neighbour no 4’s cute little puppy. Who would they come to? You.
Highly unlikely but that’s the scenario the insurance won’t underwrite.

I like @LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand idea.

If it came up again I might be inclined to ask why no one had bought one before as it seems they are quite keen to use one.

From experience I learned to tell anyone who asks to borrow something that I no longer do that for anyone. It’s not personal it’s just that promises to take care of things and return them promptly have been broken more often than not.

Absolutely do not lend it or anything else for that matter! It is expensive they could crash it, break it and would they contribute to the maintenance costs (blade change, oil, fuel etc.) they are simply just rude to ask! If your husband wants additional income in could offer for a charge to cut their grass for them but again this may need insurance and open another can of worms but simply NO!

stick to parcels and bins if it is convenient to you

1. Do they ever reciprocate and help you back?
2. The amount of favours these people ask for, and the extent of them (giving lifts to the airport?! Petsitting?! Those are services everyone else PAY for), is insane. When they ask for so much, so often it goes beyond "helping a neighbour" - this is called a paid maid or butler. Emphasis on the word PAID.
3. The neighbour who said "we all help each other out here" - I would have responded with, "none of you have ever helped us, though, so why exactly are you expecting us to help you? We'll gladly help out if we also get some help in return. Otherwise, this feels an awful like entitlement to our time and labour with nothing in it for us".

I would set some clear boundaries, and stop doing favours to anyone who never offers to help me.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Would these neighbours lend you a big ticket item? Ask if you can borrow their car...

Cheeky feckers. Ask if you can borrow their car to save you money on running your own.

I would suggest anything that requires maintenance / has associated runnings costs / depreciates significantly with use (i.e. there is an ongoing cost of use) is not to be expected to be shared.

When we moved in, some of the neighbours spoke to us about expectations of living there
Wow, I would have made my excuses to leave the conversation at that point Im afraid! You know they are going to be problematic by that point.

They asked my husband and he said no so then spoke to me about it after that.
You did right by saying no otherwise you would always be the link to them, like kids asking mum after dad has said no. If they ask in future for anything else always ask them if they have already asked your dh.

Its absolutely ridiculous to ask you to lend your BRAND NEW ride on mower
Just say NO
An expensive item requiring fuel and servicing
I also live on a housing estate with entitled people
I use a gardener for large gardening jobs like pollarding trees etc
I stopped lending people thing when they were returned broken
We lent a hedge trimmer to a tight arse neighbour who needs to pay for a gardener
It was returned with a broken charger that I had to pay to replace
People are utterly ridiculous I was cutting some hedge recently and had a wealthy neighbour ask me to cut his hedge
Pay the gardener was my response

Its frustrating but be firm with your boundaries