To say my DS cant keep missing school because the school “cant cope”??

As already stated, they should call an emergency review of his EHCP and seek more support/funding from the LA, not unlawfully exclude him. It's in ALL the children's and staff's best interests to do this, so why aren't they?

This sounds very difficult but it sounds like the school isn't a good fit anymore and his needs have changed, which they aren't equipped to deal with. If he has become a safety risk then they have no choice but to ask you to pick him up. Schools have limited resources and if they're fulfilling the EHCP then they have nowhere to go beyond that. They are also probably trying to avoid a permanent exclusion if he is throwing chairs and pushing furniture with staff around.
Does you LA pay for children to go to private schools, or is there a special school he could get a place at? If so, I'd start pushing for it now.

There's a difference though between working with school and just doing whatever they ask, especially when what they ask is illegal and it isn't wrong for OP to raise that with school.

Acting unlawfully is hardly working with OP either and it has to go both ways.

what are schools supposed to do?
what is the school meant to do?

Follow the correct processes and procedures, not just act unlawfully.

This is why people don’t want to go into teaching any more and why so many leave

Because they have to follow the law? Yes it's shocking teachers aren't exempt.

"In this situation it’s just not fair for the parent to say “no keep him he’s entitled to an education” and refuse to work with the school if they can"

Of course it isn't, that is not my point.

My point is that the school cannot keep calling the child's parent saying to come and collect them, without putting a plan in place for what happens next. They cannot keep doing this as it is not in line with their legal obligations.

From what the OP has said on this thread she doesn't come across as someone not trying to work with the school her child is at. She doesn't come across as someone who is not interested in her child. What I hear is that she is getting no where and being told, just take your child home. That's not right or fair.

High Courts in England have already have repeatedly ruled that excuses from schools, saying they are understaffed, lack of resources etc cannot be used by a council to avoid fulfilling this duty.

Also, telling a parent that a child can only attend part-time, or asking them to keep the child at home without a formal suspension or expulsion, constitutes an illegal exclusion.

All of this and more is the point I am trying to make.

So yes you’re not wrong in that it should be possible to try to stop things getting to the chair- throwing stage, but in most mainstream schools in any class of 30 there will be quite a few kids with EHCPs (there were 5 in one of my kids classes), a couple more who have SEN but no EHCP, pupil premium children, some kids where there might also be safeguarding concerns at home, and some more where they are having an argument with their mates, feeling sick, being sick or are just having a bad day/ behaving like a tit. In this environment a single class teacher is trying to deliver a really full curriculum, observe lessons, give challenging work to the most able kids and help the ones who don’t understand. They might have a LSA/ TA but not always, especially if the TA is already doing an intervention/ ill/ helping another child.

It’s simply not possible for a single teacher to be so attuned to your child’s needs that they always see a meltdown coming and head it off with an appropriate technique in good time. A 1-1 might be able to do this, but essentially this is why special schools have so few children per teacher and also specialist training and premises (chill out rooms etc).

It’s a new term - a LOT of kids will be over-excited and out of classroom routine. So you can expect the first few months to be noisier, more disrupted etc.

You commented ”obviously they dont want to move children around just because there is a problem” - in my limited experience this is the only reason they will move people around usually.

Remember yours may not be the only child kicking off. The class teacher could be dealing with numerous kids who all have behavioural disorders.

It’s not really about whether he intends to hurt another child or not - many children will find his rage and outbursts very upsetting and frightening. The fact they know he’s capable of throwing a chair means that as soon as he kicks off, those kids will be worried he’ll cause them an injury. They are in a state of perpetual anxiety about it. My dd had THREE boys like this in her class all the way through y1 to Y6 and now she is 16 she talks with nothing but bitterness about her primary school. She opted out of mixed education and told me several times “she never wants to be in a classroom with a boy ever again”. (Obviously I’m not saying girls can’t be aggressive and violent when disregulated, but her experience is only boys are - the ND girls in her class didn’t explode violently.) Now she’s old enough to explain I realise it was very traumatising and I never realised the extent of her dread when she had to go in the classroom with those boys, trapped with her fear of them day after day after day.

So I would definitely look into moving him - I wouldn’t leave him where he poses a threat and is clearly deeply unhappy and unable to

Your son is not the schools responsibility hes yours and they need to keep other children and staff safe, it sounds like your son doesnt want to go And has control, maybe a SEN school would be better and if he does well maybe he can transfer back but saying the school are at fault and its their problem is not the solition

For what it’s worth I just wanted to mention this as someone who sees it from the other side.

Just because a child has an EHCP doesn’t mean the school get funding for everything necessary. For example, I have seen EHCPs recommending 1-2-1 support and they come with funding of £5,000 per year. How on earth are a school meant to fund 1-2-1 for a child on that? They don’t necessarily have reserve funding to cover the difference which is substantial on many occasions.

It also isn’t provided when the EHCP is issued - I have known occasions where it took 9-12 months for the school to receive the funding from the LA. So how on earth are the school meant to fund anything in the meantime?

My point is that school in your case are more than likely not to be over staffed to the point they have someone available to be with him 1-2-1 when he needs it to help regulate, that’s why they need your support. I agree that if you can come and help him regulate he should go back to class if possible.

Funding is currently so dire in schools it is becoming unusual to have a full time TA in each class. And there can be many conflicting needs that have to be juggled. And for the other children it is scary if things have been thrown - for some children this would make them scared to go.

All I would say is this. Please work with the school. You say they were good with your other child. They can support you in getting the EHCP reviewed and you can support them trying to get extra intervention or support for him.

However, I wouldn’t totally discount what your DH is saying. It may come to this and it may be good to research and have better knowledge of your options.

i wish you the best.

How did you know how many children had EHCP in the class? That's not public information.

You are being poorly served by the school.

It's not your responsibility to come up with a plan (they haven't even let you see in the classroom!) nor to take an overview of the needs of all the children.

You suspect they're not following the EHCP. They're not doing exclusion paperwork. They are at fault.

Schools can take legal action but they rarely do. I do know of one case where a school instigated judicial review action when a LA decimated a child's EHCP to make the school seem suitable when they weren't.

They could also do this when the EHCP isn't being appropriately funded. But again they rarely do.

They rarely stand up and tell LAs a child's EHCP needs to be more specific and quantified, despite knowing they should be and this is the only way to ensure adequate funding is provided. Why not?

schools can also tell parents they can't meet needs because they can't do x due to lack of funding and parents can then take action. Again schools very rarely do this though. Why not? These last two in particular wouldn't cost them a penny.

So I absolutely agree that the school do need a plan in place but I think where we disagree is that I think it is reasonable in the short term for the school to ask parents to implement a reduced timetable informally if this helps. And maybe whilst they work out whether this is an “blip” or a longer term issue. A reduced timetable for a short time with the consent of the parent isn’t unlawful. And in lots of cases schools ask the parent to collect because they would rather have this than take more formal action which will also be on the child’s record if the behaviour escalates. SEN schools can be really strict about where they won’t take children with behaviour difficulties as well as SEN, and it won’t do the OP’s child any favours (a) to have a record of exclusions and (more importantly) (b) to be kept at school in a situation where they are already completely
overwhelmed.

We said this to our relative - it was clear by chirstmas this was way wind was blowing. Took them till end of summer term to accept that and by then no local school would take the child saying couldn't meet needs.

The current school clearly do not want the child - and now no other school does leaving relative stuck and struggling round work.

If there is a school change for secondary coming up - now would be time to research and talk to local services about options - but special school place well that may well depend on what there is in your area but I'd be looking and then deciding what's best and how to get it.

Schools are loco parentis and absolutely are responsible for a child during the time the child is at school.

This must be very difficult but I agree with other posters. Throwing chairs and tables is distrupting and unsafe for other kids. I know nobody got hurt but they could get injured next time. I've heard amazing things about specialist schools which may be more suited to your son's needs.

But why does it require an informal (and thus unlawful) part time timetable? If a part time timetable is needed why haven't they offered a formal part time timetable with appropriate monitoring measures and a proper plan for reintegration or alternative provision?

The parent can be asked, yes (the OP doesn't appear to have been?) and the OP can decline if she likes. If the school do not know what's triggering the behaviour, nor have a plan to deal with it, what will be different after two weeks (I think two weeks is what's recommended?)

So much of this sounds like my DS. The only difference is he would just walk out of the classroom and disappear - usually to the toilets and be inconsolable rather than aggressive. He ended up refusing school a lot of the time. Tellingly it was only in certain lessons (secondary school) and with teachers who (a) ran very noisy classrooms and (b) who somehow allowed conflict to develop between the pupils - not my son who wouldn't say boo to a goose, but other pupils. The surrounding conflict was too much for my son. I can totally understand how your DS might end up being overwhelmed in a similar classroom and unable to regulate his emotions. Luckily our school agreed that he didn't have to attend the particular lessons that bothered him (no idea what they told the teachers concerned!). So in the end he was back in school for most of it.

If it happens at the same time each day, could you trial DS coming out of lessons before the time when he gets overwhelmed in that noisy period just before lunch. Maybe he could run some errands for the class teacher or be given some activity in the library to do?

But I do agree, you need to have a conversation with the school and SENCO before rushing to send him to a new school which would be a huge upheaval for an already distressed young boy.

"In total, across the period between 2020 and 2025, we found that more than 2,000 children with special educational needs were in schools that went on to close."

How pupils with special educational needs are more likely to see their schools close - BBC News https://share.google/83FNoaF7FL8tWBECv

I'm a teacher, albeit secondary.

You have sympathies. My (now adult son) is epileptic and we were often called to come and pick him up. Not because he was having a seizure, but the school would sometimes worry that he didn't seem quite right and regularly thought that he'd be better at home.

Potentially, what's happened with your son is that the transition between one phase of his primary education (a bit like the old infants) and another phase (a bit like the old juniors) hasn't been managed super well. The school might have an ethos of a slightly stricter routine at your son's age and less support overall in the classroom, expectations could also have shifted. He could be struggling to adapt. I think the moving up into another year group big picture could be useful for you.

The guidance is clear that a reduced timetable should not be used to manage behaviour.

The school calling the OP like they are, isn’t a reduced timetable either, it is an informal suspension and should not happen. The guidance is clear that it is unlawful to exclude a pupil simply because they have SEN or a disability that the school feels it is unable to meet and that all suspensions must be formal.