AIBU to make a roast when my daughter asked me not to?

She isn’t a child. She’s 22. She is perfectly capable of knowing what she likes and doesn’t like without needing someone to constantly lecture her with, “You have to try everything, and only then can you decide whether you like it.” She has preferences. She’s an adult. That’s normal.

And honestly, why are people acting like we’re living through WWII rationing? As if having a preference about what you eat is some outrageous modern luxury and everyone needs to be grateful for whatever happens to be put in front of them.

Somehow, though, forcing your family to eat food they don’t like is being presented as some profound parenting philosophy here. Apparently, “everyone actually enjoying dinner together” is now a terrible concept. Because obviously, sitting around a table eating something nobody wants is far more meaningful than cooking something everyone will genuinely enjoy and actually want to share.

And the irony is almost comical. We live in a time when people are constantly talking about having a healthy relationship with food, yet somehow making food enjoyable for your own family is treated like spoiling them.

What's the point of having a freezer if you still stick to use-by dates?? The whole point of a freezer is to be able to keep stuff "fresh" almost indefinitely.

Either you don't understand what a freezer does, or you're getting the word mixed up with fridge.

BTW, you won't come to any harm from cooking and eating a chicken one day past its use-by date.

Msybe they’re the dd as they can’t seem to see how unreasonable and ridicilous 22 yr old dd is being.

Since when is it acceptable for someone to dictate what everyone else can’t eat because they don’t ‘fancy’ it.

Then tell her she’s a grown ass adult who can make her own food. You are not her maid.

You can even put it in the freezer on its use by date. I wouldn’t put it in after that day but I often stick food (including chicken) in the freezer on their use by date, if I’m not going to eat it yet.

I know it’s unreal isn’t it 🤣🤣

I suppose what the DD could’ve said, hey mum I don’t fancy a roast, but you sit down put your feet up and I’ll make us something else…… but somehow, I don’t think she’s “that” type of daughter.

i mean someone goes to the trouble of cooking for a separate meal and you’re unhappy with them! 🤦‍♀️

This!

This is the most un-British thing I’ve ever heard, she doesn’t like a roast, utterly ridiculous. Police should be involved.

Your daughter's entitled generation then enter the workforce and make it hard for the rest of us. I'm thoroughly fed up of these 20 somethings now. I should start another thread about the new graduates starting at my workplace! 😕

You were not unreasonable, your dd was for rejecting the pasta bake and playing victim by eating the leftovers.

Like what? It would have gone bad in a week?

She wasn’t forced to eat the roast dinner. She had a pasta bake and cottage pie as alternatives. She was dictating what everyone else wasn’t allowed to eat.

JFC!!!

No one made her eat anything she didn’t fucking like, the mother made her a separate fucking meal that the DD also didn’t fancy!

It’s the DD that’s forcing the family to not have the roast they wanted! So all your sanctimony should be aimed at her!!

Then she can get off her backside and go and buy / make something else!
Entitled!

Praise the lord someone else can see the real situation!

The DD is trying to be the dictator!

A pasta bake for Sunday dinner? Be still my beating heart.

Presumably what she actually wanted was a nice Sunday dinner which wasn't meat, gravy and 2 veg. Even a lasagne with salad and garlic bread would have been more exciting. My DH is wedded to a traditional roast and sometimes its just so boring.

What do you mean, This? She wasn’t forced to eat anything, it was she who was forcing people to not eat something.

She wasnt.

She ASKED. Is that not even allowed for an adult in the house to ask for something eise? Everyone has to do as the cook decides or else maybe? Or everyone cooks what they want (and the OP eats her roast dinner on her own - never mind the waste). I’m pretty sure that if tge dd was cooking agd was doing tge same - cooking something she knows the OP doesn’t like despite having agreed she wouldn’t - the OP would not like it one bit.

The OP though AGREED and then WENT BACK ON HER WORD. That was shit.

This has gone on for 14 pages???

She was being an ungrateful brat! She had 3 options and was also capable of cooking for herself. My
10 year old DS wouldn’t carry on like this.

Why on earth would you make a family dinner with two meals that you already know they don’t like? It just seems like such a waste of time, effort, and money.

Wouldn’t it make much more sense to cook something that everyone actually enjoys?

She got something else!

Compromise?

I don’t like roast can I have something else?

Yes, I’ll do you a pasta bake!

Rest of family wanted roast (what on earth you’re talking about it being a waste), maybe they should’ve said no, we will dictate you’re having a roast because we are?

instead everyone got what they wanted with additional work for OP.

I can’t understand why others can’t see that. It’s so obvious she’s being dictator-like. My youngest (21) doesn’t really like roast dinners either, my eldest loves them. If I wanted to make a roast dinner he would be given an alternstive option and everyone else would be eating the roast dinner. He’s not a drama llama though so it wouldn’t (and hasn’t) been an issue.

It wasn't even the best before date, it was the sell by date! Ludicrous.

A dictator for ASKING for something else 😂😂😂
A dictator for being disappointed for her mum to agree to one thing and then decides to go back on her word 😂😂
Oh and a dictator to ask fur somethimg else without asking for a specific thing 😂😂

You all have a pretty skewed idea of what a dictator is.

And then it’s apparently better to ask real people like posters on MN rather than AI. Yep such a neutral place with really valid views, grounded in reality.

At least, you’ve all made me laugh 😂😂

The fact that people are losing their minds over someone not liking a roast and having the audacity to ask if the family could have something else for a change. She didn't ask the mum to cook her a separate meal, the mum agreed to make something else and then decided to make a roast and a 2nd meal for the daughter. I think it's nice to eat the same thing as a family so we roate what we eat so everyone gets to enjoy their favourite and whilst they eat the other meals they are presented it's not their favourite which is OK. I just think the mum should have just said I'll be making a roast anyway so what to you want or do you want to sort yourself out rather than saying yes then doing it anyway. The thread should be called, Am I being unreasonable for making the meal I said I wouldn't? Or am I being unreasonable for agreeing to make a different family meal and then not doing so? Responses would be very different but that's more accurate to what happened.