AIBU to make a roast when my daughter asked me not to?

And as you’re throwing around insults and digs, my children have been brought up to be respectful of people cooking for them! Yours may struggle and find it an issue, at their lonely dinner table no one wants to share because they don’t want to be dictated to what they can eat!

Why is it insane? Don’t most people try and use things up that are in the freezer before they get too old and before buying lots of new stuff? I think up to three months is ideal but not much longer.

I grew up in a house where we had a choice. We could eat what Mum or Dad cooked or go without.

No-one ever questioned anything about the food.

What a load of nonsense.
If a 22 year old wants something specific she can make it herself unless of course she was your guest for the meal, and lives elsewhere.

As long as it has been consistently kept below - 18 degrees celcius since before its use by date it will be perfectly safe to eat. After a year you can expect the texture and taste may start to deteriorate, but as long as it's kept properly frozen it would be safe to eat for decades.

What was the date?

I think your dd was being quite the drama llama. Is she normally like this about fairly inane stuff? Or does she have food issues?

I buy turkey crowns in the after christmas sale and freeze it. Sometimes we eat it around easter, sometimes it stays there until the following christmas

I think she means that it’s insane to freeze and then use something before it’s sell by date.

You might as well keep it in the fridge if you are going to do that.

The brat got what she wanted, which wasn’t a roast! She didn’t want a roast and didn’t get one!

But she still wasn’t happy, being cooked a separate meal! Have you missed that point?

Bossy? Because I actually care whether my guests enjoy the food I’ve made? That’s not “bossy” : it’s called being a considerate host. I entertain all the time, and I always tell people what I’m making beforehand because I have enough respect for my guests to care about their preferences.

I would never make something like seafood pasta and then expect people to sit there forcing themselves to eat it just to avoid hurting my feelings. That’s not hospitality; that’s ridiculous.

Maybe it’s a cultural difference. In my culture, when you have people over, you ask what they like, you make an effort, and you cater to them where you can. My mum has always done that for us — when I was 22, and she still does it now that I’m 39.

So I genuinely don’t understand your attitude. What exactly is the point of feeding people if you couldn’t care less whether they actually enjoy what you’ve served? And why are you acting as though not liking a particular food is some kind of personal offence?

People are allowed to have preferences. Expecting them to eat something they dislike just to make you feel good is far more selfish than simply asking what they like.

If caring whether my guests enjoy themselves makes me “bossy,” then I’ll happily be bossy. I’d rather be that than someone who expects people to suffer through a meal just to protect my ego.

Me too. In all the years we lived at home there was never a single conversation about what we wanted for dinner (or any meal). It was eat it or go hungry. You simply never questioned it. I admit though I did discuss options with my kids, but wished I hadn’t and should have just followed my mum’s way instead.

I don’t think you did anything wrong here. She is 22 not 6. And she had the pasta bake available but obviously wanted to make her displeasure clear by not eating that and having the cottage pie.
Unless there is further background info, your DD needs to work out how to deal with minor disappointments in life. I suspect at 22 she is torn between wanting to be independent and at the same time really not. Does she cook dinners at all? For herself and for the family? If not, she should be.

The point is that the mum agreed to make something else which she then didn't, it's not hard to understand the difference between "can we have something instead of a roast?" and I don't want a roast. The OP said it in her post that she agreed to that them did it anyway. If the DD had known she was doing a roast anyway she could have been prepared for that. The mum knew what she implied by agreeing to make something else. A simple conversation at that point could have avoided the whole drama

@Kittyninja267

i know right… when OP is all alone in a nursing home she’ll only have herself to blame!

She’s a spoilt brat! Eat what you’re given and be bloody grateful or batch cook for yourself and warm stuff up.
Mums have enough going on and you do get to a point where it become a chore.

22 yo and dictating what a family meal should be. WTAF!!

Apparently you could if you wanted to, defrost a woolly mammoth that has been frozen for millions of years and eat it.

Frozen food does have a best before date, presumably OP's frozen chicken had one on it? Dunno why this is a strange concept to people.

The point is the mum made her pasta bake! for her coz she doesn’t like a roast! Why should DD dictate that nobody could have a roast, when her DM has gone to the trouble of making her a separate meal.

She had what she wanted. OP didn’t present her with a roast dinner, that was for others to eat.

I’ve done this, don’t do it, the hair gets in your teeth!

That’s not how freezers work 🤦‍♀️. The point of them is that you can eat food past its use by date or it might as well just go in the fridge.

You allow your children to dictate what you eat?

Ive heard it all now!!

Sorry

buy
prepare
cook
and eat!

😂

Shock horror, we all like different things so we have meals that we all like on various days. That doesn't mean I am dictated to, just means I listen and take everyone's preferences in to consideration as well as mine and my husband.
Do I cook various meals in one day? No.
Do I cook meals my kids dislike repeatedly? No
Are my kids brats because they don't like some foods? No
There are plenty of options out there of which none mean being a brat or dictating to people.