AIBU to refuse to cut short our holiday for childcare?

This!

But they were taken there last year by their Dad, without their half-siblings.

It’s not the job of OP to police how her husband chooses to parent his oldest children. Whatever arrangements he wants to make are between him and his ex.

Thank you, I had missed that part. Makes it even all the more astounding that he jumped straight into having two more kids to be honest. His older kids need stability, not to feel like they are constantly a childcare issue to be resolved.

Read the thread, so many people saying don't cut the holiday short but not taking them is horrible. The vote is whether they cut the holiday short.

I agree don't cut the holiday short, however not taking them is horrible.

How he treated her? She cheated on him.

No not really. My guess is she’s difficult because she’s so bitter about how he treated her.

Haha, that is a very arrogant post. What makes you think people don't know what they're voting for?

He also had a holiday with just his oldest. Then all together. He is giving them all equal over time. It is fare and it would be more enjoyable for all, having age appropriate holidays with their age group in mind and no boredom in between standing around waiting for things they are not interested in. There have been many on this thread saying they do the same with their biological children.

Also the step children get to go away with the mum each year, why should they have to hear about their half siblings extra holiday each year but never have anything for themselves. Or should the OP have to take them away on her own to match up? How fare can you go with fairness in a split family. There will always be 1 child experiencing something the other doesn't

What ages are they?

This really is a wild take. The 2 older children went to Disney last year, the 2 younger children are there now. It's perfectly fair and actually a great way of doing it because the children get more individual attention and can do more of what they like without having to cater for younger/older ones.

I took my oldest three children away this year without my youngest. We are taking my youngest and my step daughter to Disney later this year without my older three, we're lucky to be in a position to be able to do this but I hardly think we're terrible parents for it.

I'm not sure they do disagree

I agree they shouldn't cut their holiday short.

I also think it's horrible what they've done

95% of people in the poll disagree with your view. You are seriously projecting.

Step mothers always get a bashing on here no matter how nice they sound 🙈

Women expression opinions aren’t ‘screaming’, you’ve let your internalised misogyny slip out there.

I’m a step-parent. The best thing about it is you get to see what kind of parent your partner is before you commit to children with them.

Can only suggest anyone contemplating it thinks long and hard before having a child with anyone who sees their children so little, prefers to holiday without them, and is comfortable with their kids going through so much change over such a very very short period of time with two families so very close in age,

She had extra money for childcare AND a holiday club for last week and didn't use it.

So why doesn't she have any money for childcare this week?

I have read the OP's posts but not the full thread, so apologies if this point has been made.

I'm not angry at all.

I think it's awful how much you're against a father spending time with just his older kids. Why do the younger 2 have to be there all the time? It's good that he took the older kids to Disney and he can focus on just them. Why are you so angry?

I don’t think you should cut your holiday short, you should advise her she can take unpaid parental leave which is a legal entitlement.
I am interested to know if you separated from your husband and had two more children with someone else would you leave your current children with your now husband whilst you went on holiday with your other two children and your new husband? I can kind of appreciate the Disney situation is special and I know of a few families who have taken older children one year and younger the next and left the others with grandparents but I feel that’s quite specific situation and surely you don’t just mean generally you would go on holiday without your step children?

any comment about the mum who can’t seem to look after the two kids she has, or just the dad?

We are on holiday currently with our 2 dc (2 and 4) (Disney Paris) due back home on Wednesday. Dh has 2 older dc from previous marriage (6 and 8).

Wow he moved on pretty quick. WTF is wrong with these men who seem to need to procreate so frequently?

I imagine a benefit of splitting the DC Disney experience across the years is that the older kids got 1 on 1 time with their dad. If all 4 went last year and this year the DSCs might feel they wanted a bit of special time with their dad. I suppose it depends how close all 4 are but I can see why it makes sense to take them in 2 lots of 2 vs the larger group of 4. I actually think it's a nice idea!

He is.

He took the eldest 2 to Disney last year, and is taking the youngest 2 there this year.

Totally equal.

If he took the oldest 2 again this year, that would be unfair on the youngest 2.

I agree, no one is a saint and no one is a sinner all the time, people are far more nuanced than that. So when an OP comes on pleading sweetness and light trotting out every trope in the book when they had a child just 2 years after he had a child with his first wife, don’t expect everyone to lap up everything she says. You said yourself women aren’t perfect, of course they’re not, OP definitely isn’t either.

Well we clearly don't know the access arrangements. It's obviously not a 5/2 arrangement because the OPs DH has them 10 overnights pm not 8.

Also arrangements often change during non term time. I can only speak for my own DHs order which is a 5/2/2/5 scenario but during the summer each parent gets 14 day blocks in order to facilitate any holidays.

They also regularly swap days if it's in the best interests of the child. For example SS mum wanted to go to a gig with him so she took 2 of my DHs days in June and we will have SS an extra 2 days in August.

Also we don't know how far the travel is.